Job suggestions for college age son please (Dallas, Plano: apartments, hotels)

[Saintmarks]

I have a 19 year old that I had to bring back home from College Station last month because the situation wasn't working for him, sad to admit (we are only suppossed to brag on our progeny like in Christmas letters, right?)

I laid down the law (or at least thought I was) and told him he had to find a job and see what life is like for those who don't stick with their studies and complete their degree. So far, he has not found anything. He has visited most of the retail establishments in a 5 mile radius. He is overweight and has some self esteem issues and getting out on his own is not working.

I am at that point of despair. The tough love thing is not working right now and I am not the personality type to really stick with it anyway (ok go ahead and recommend us for Dr. Phil). I am trying to direct him and give suggestions, but in this day and age it is all in "who you know." As we are not that long in the area, don't have a ton of contacts like I would if we were still in the Atlanta area.

We are in McKinney, so McKinney would be preferable, but Allen, Frisco or Plano would work as well. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

[jtrichel]

I personally believe that working in hotels and restaurants builds character. Bell boy, bus boy, whatever. That's what my parents made me do in college. Since your'e asking about "connections" I am assuming that your "Saintmarks" registered name is referring to somehthing other than the connections laden campus on Preston (?)

You might also want to rethink the 5 mile radius, that seems prohibitive.

[bettylu]

What about the local community centers or YMCA type places? They seem to always have a need for that age to work as year round lifeguards for indoor pools, etc. I have to agree w/above poster about the waiting tables thing - builds character for sure.

[WillysB]

There's some lessons to be learned, real fast, from mowing lawns. And with immigrations issues....

[Saintmarks]

Originally Posted by jtrichel

I personally believe that working in hotels and restaurants builds character. Bell boy, bus boy, whatever. That's what my parents made me do in college. Since your'e asking about "connections" I am assuming that your "Saintmarks" registered name is referring to somehthing other than the connections laden campus on Preston (?)

I got the online handle from the small rural community in Georgia that I hale from. Don't have the blue blood Dallas pedigree, sorry to say, or we wouldn't be in this position. He could just live off me until he could get his hands on his trust fund.

I have several guys at my church that have small construction type companies, would love for him to work for them and they would be willing to hire, but in this economy everyone I've spoken in this position has laid guys off and are hurting themselves. Would love for him to do some hard, sweaty labor.

[loves2read]

then have him volunteer for habitat for humanity--they can always use volunteers--he can learn some real skills that might help him get a job later--and he can learn that there are people worse off than himself even in this economy where he is going to have hard time getting work...

there are other agencies that can use volunteer help as well--if he likes animals have him volunteer with an animal rescue group or do tutoring for kids in need

if you want you can tie his being a volunteer into minimum allowance because you are probably going to be paying him something anyway...
make it a condition of his staying home that he has to volunteer a certain number of hours a week as a base line and then he can make a resume and walk himself around the strip malls in the area

I see signs in my area in Tarrant county that stores like Target and Kroger are hiring--
ALDI is hiring if there is one going in your area...

there are plenty of jobs that pay crappy that people really don't want to take because they can't support themselves but your son is basically having that taken care of
just don't let him off the hook--
and remember that since he is not in college you are going to have to stay paying COBRA to cover him for health care--not cheap--I would definitely make him pay 50% of that bill if he does get a job...

IF YOU DON"T HOLD HIM ACCOUNTABLE YOU HAVE ONLY YOURSELF TO BLAME

I say that because my husband has someone working in his dept who has son 21 or 22 now who fell off the rails in high school supposedly as soon as he got his driver's license and a car of his own--started staying out past curfew, dropped his old friends for new ones that were bad influence, started failing classes and cutting school, and finally drinking and then using drugs...
this bad behavior was mixed with yelling and profanity toward his parents, and basically ruining his chances of any positive behavior...he has started two different area colleges with the tuition his mom and dad had already banked in his tomorrow fund and wasted all the money because he flunked out--they put money into his apartments, into cars when he totaled two they gave him--and he is just a waste of space--frankly they are afraid of him--

his parents rather than taking a hard line with him vacillated--one minute being tough and the next, backtracking and caving in to his demands...
should have gone for counseling right from the start to find out why a boy they claimed was honor student, good athlete and motivated to succeed turned into such a loser...

as a former teacher--I initially thought when he started telling my husband all this that either he had been abused and was acting out of repressed rage (he had been involved in soccer from a young age and played on select teams as well as his school's so there was the possiblity that a coach had abused him),
or that he had always had opposition-defiant disorder they ignored until he was too big and they couldn't,
or he was into drugs (and that was evident fairly soon)...
or a combination of all of them...

in any case--intervention through some demanding counseling for the whole family was better than sticking their heads in the sand which is basically what they did for past 4 or 5 years...

get your son and your family some counseling---and get someone who believes in telling it like it is when there is a disfunctional situation going on...having psychologists who just listen and don't argue for specific change is just wasting your time and padding their bill...

[MaryS80]

You say he has tried retail, has he tried applying at one of the local supermarkets. They hire plenty of teens and young adults with little work experience. It's a tough job market for anyone at any level, it's so important that he takes the initiative and call places back, ask for an interview and make sure they received his application or resume. These places have to know the applicant is genuinely interested

As you said there may be some self esteem issues, but nothing that should hold him back from being employed. I work for one of the big grocery chains we hire all sorts of people, young, old, and everything in between. I've worked with kids who have Down Syndrome, Autism, and all sorts of "disabilities". Someone as capable as your son should have no problem getting a job.

I would advise that it may take some tough love. My stepbrother boomeranged back home when he was 25, and it took a full decade to get him standing on his own two feet. It put my father and step mother in debt, he totaled a car of theirs and could never hold down a job for long. Everytime they tried to come down on him he would give his mother some sob story and make her feel guilty and tell her that his only other option would to live on the street. Don't be an enabler, and don;t allow your son to take advantage. A parents love is only natural, but don't be a sucker.

[GayleTX]

You have the right plan. A little sweat seems to develop a thirst for knowledge in many cases. My son wasn't going to go to college til he spent the summer on the maintenance crew at a state park....he specialized in the sewer system. (he now has a master's degree, by the way).

From the appearance of most of the guys I see working the road construction crews (and they are all over the place now and will be all summer), they aren't too particular about appearances...and most of them are quite young, so I know they don't have much experience.

Has he registered with the state employment office? Many companies are required to list their openings there and they take whomever that office sends them for manual labor.

Being willing to work the night shift and weekends is a big plus when applying for jobs in retail and food service....he needs to make sure they know he's available for that.

[Spree]

Hawaiin Falls is hiring Hawaiian Falls Waterpark! He needs go out and hit the pavement and get scour the area for jobs.

I would also encourage him to enroll in community college atleast half time. That way he can plug along at some courses and maybe make a local connection that way while getting some schooling done.

Not sure what you might think of him joining the military. There are plenty of people I know that enlisted in the Air Force, gained self confidence, a technical skill and traveled the world in their young adulthood. There's a unique niche of jobs in the airline industry that a prior military person with experience in aircraft maintenance is looked upon very favorably in the civilian world.

[FarNorthDallas]

I would steer clear of retail. I was just talking to a neighbor with two sons with the same problem. One is college material and one is not. The college material son does take classes at the Jr college. But both tried retail and it was deadend and they only got scheduled 15 hours a week, so no real money and both have since gotten out. (I worked retail in college - major dept store - and it was without a doubt the worst job I ever had.) Plus, retail experience doesn't help a person out at all for getting any other job and recruiters will tell you they toss resumes of people who only show retail experience. It's that bad.

So, one of her sons is working in a call center. The other is helping family-owned businesses - construction and a linen service.

What about security guard?

School Bus driver? Job Postings : Plano ISD

Or some kind of warehouse job like this one NOW HIRING (http://dallas.craigslist.org/ndf/mnu/1673224476.html - broken link)