Where to Meet a Guy

[DelawareLiz]

Qworldorder's post is spot on....about everything. I met my husband on Match.com. I was able to type out all my criteria and correspond with him before wasting my time meeting somebody who would not be up to my standards.

[seanlax]

After 10 years of terrible luck on Match.com, my mother found success. I wouldn't say its a fool-proof solution. It certainly requires a lot of patience.

People my age talk about how much harder it is for young people to date today. But I disagree. There are just fewer formats in which to meet people. Best advice I have for others: do something you enjoy, and try and meet people along the way.

[EnjoyEveryDay]

Or you can follow the advice that I regularly give (for free) to my twenty-something kids:

Four Simple Rules for a Lifetime of Happiness
Rule 1: Date all you want, but don't marry.
Rule 2: If you break Rule 1, marry someone with a lot of money.
Rule 3: Don't have kids.
Rule 4: If you break Rule 3, make sure you followed Rule 2.

Of course, I am completely kidding. I always mention that I am completely kidding to the love of my life, my wonderful and beautiful wife. By the way, that's Rule 5....

[rdlr]

Originally Posted by EnjoyEveryDay

Or you can follow the advice that I regularly give (for free) to my twenty-something kids:

Four Simple Rules for a Lifetime of Happiness
Rule 1: Date all you want, but don't marry.
Rule 2: If you break Rule 1, marry someone with a lot of money.
Rule 3: Don't have kids.
Rule 4: If you break Rule 3, make sure you followed Rule 2.

Of course, I am completely kidding. I always mention that I am completely kidding to the love of my life, my wonderful and beautiful wife. By the way, that's Rule 5....

Boy, that's a lot of kids!

[newmassphd]

Originally Posted by hi733

I am in my middle 20s and want to know where to go in the area to meet a decent guy. I have heard a lot of people my age go to Ocean City, Maryland in the summer. Is that a good place to meet guys?

OK, so its been 13 years since I've been mid twenties, but perhaps I could offer some input.

What are you looking to find when you mention a decent guy?

It is difficult to assess whether or not a guy is decent given the party scene, albeit young and energetic,
at a beach party area. If you are looking purely for someone who is fun and or to enjoy company in
the short term, who am I to judge.

I would say to change the setting to one where you have more opportunity to assess whether or not someone
is decent in the way that you measure it.

When I was young and single, I did a bunch of things out of interest and met a huge number of decent
people.

- For a woman looking to meet guys, a technical convention or sci-fi type gathering such as Star
Trek Convention, Comic Con, etc. Women to whom I mention this chuckle and later report back
to me "holy crap why didn't I do this before!" Think about it, many young male Engineers who's
career choice was influenced by the popular culture side of things. They are all busy, gainfully
employed, must be professional and responsible, organized, articulate, and engaging for their
day to day careers.

- Volunteer for a political campaign. Only if your values coincide with the particular candidate.
There will be MANY interesting people there. The younger ones will be interesting and you will
learn the things in life that are meaningful to them from many many opportunities to converse
while stuffing envelopes, putting together mailers, or taking a break from phone banking.
Some will be mid twenties and single. The married members will say, "hey I have a coworker
or friend who would be perfect for you." The retirees will say I have a nephew who would
be perfect for you.

- Be happy. You would be very surprised at how simply being happy about everyday life can
attract a member of the opposite sex. Is is feeding the ducks, or flying a kite, maybe its
passing a soccer ball back and forth with a friend in the park, it doesn't matter. People want
to be around and get to know pleasant people. Remember the old saying. Its not what you
say, but how you make them feel about themselves that they remember. Everyone wants
to get to know someone who makes them feel great. Its just human nature.

Personally, way back, I had tried internet dating. It never worked out because I prefer atoms over
bits. Moreover, I things online are hyper emphasized. Everyone on-line was a Rhodes Scholar,
who spoke 3 languages, was a semi-pro Vegan athlete, who either goes hiking or long walks
on the beach. I remember thinking always "holy crap! Isn't there anyone who occasionally
likes a silly Adam Sandler movie and a messy sloppy burger?"

Anyway, decide what is your definition of descent and be honest with yourself.

Then, choose a venue where you are not seeing the "trailer" for the people you meet.
At the party scene, everyone has their best polish, their best clothes, best cologne
and life just doesn't work that way.

Know what it is your definition of decent and find a venue where you have to
read the long version versus the trailer. The added benefit is you meet interesting people
and, in the process, you learn something about yourself.

[newmassphd]

Originally Posted by newmassphd

OK, so its been 13 years since I've been mid twenties, but perhaps I could offer some input.

What are you looking to find when you mention a decent guy?

It is difficult to assess whether or not a guy is decent given the party scene, albeit young and energetic,
at a beach party area. If you are looking purely for someone who is fun and or to enjoy company in
the short term, who am I to judge.

I would say to change the setting to one where you have more opportunity to assess whether or not someone
is decent in the way that you measure it.

Know what it is your definition of decent and find a venue where you have to
read the long version versus the trailer. The added benefit is you meet interesting people
and, in the process, you learn something about yourself.

And by the way I have been happily married for 10 years to an amazing French woman
(seriously) who finds my corny jokes funny, laughs at silly Adam Sandler movies, and occasionally
likes a sloppy messy hamburger!!

[harriet1954]

Originally Posted by qworldorder

Yea, not so much anymore. What's the saying--you get what you pay for? With so many other, paid services that have raised the bar for serious singles, POF is now a joke. While you can meet someone special off of any online site/app, you'll have far better success with those sites/apps that curtail spam and boorish behavior through paid subscriptions. And you'll have even better success doing things the old fashioned way--actually meeting people in real life (hence the Trolley/Main suggestions), though paid sites/apps do help facilitate such meetings.

The only reason I went on POF to see what was what was because I was working two jobs at the time -- I was delivering newspapers in the middle of the night, in addition to my 8:30-4:30 job. Also at that time, he was working nights. We just couldn't get out there normally and meet people anyplace. No time. We first started seeing each other only on Sundays, that was it. Almost 9 years later, I'm thankfully down to one job, he works for the same employer as me now (and works from home 4 days a week), and we're like an old married couple. I did meet one other person before him from there, and we dated for a month, but that didn't work out and I'm glad, because that guy needed a nurse more than a girlfriend. I'm one of the lucky ones!