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It wouldn't happen here because parents have a much greater opportunity to have input on school spending. Have you ever attended a local school board meeting? I have. Parents are very vocal when it affects their kids.
You have yet to convince a single person on this thread that you idea is viable, or even worthy of consideration. You'll either have to come up with a new pitch, or find a real career.
I always see a small, minority of parents who are very vocal, but a big majority of parents who don't even know what a school board meeting is.
You also realize that I wouldn't be receiving about 90% of the money? The idea of the salary is to just avoid inconveniencing the students by paying for their meals in advance and not restricting their choice of foods.
I know this might come as a shock to you, since adults are all-knowing and all-powerful, but mean girls don't really care if you approve of their behavior or not.
You are SO wrong. If you were really knowledgeable about pre/young teens, you would know that they thrive on peer/authority figure approval.
The worst thing an adult can do is to appear to give validation.
This is patently false. You embolden bullies when you laugh with them.
I wasn't terribly worried about what you were saying until you made the above statement. Just about everyone who has patiently taken the time to respond to you has a great deal of experience of working with young people. You brushed off their expertise in this field for each and every valid point that they have made. I have been keeping up with this thread and have yet to find someone who agrees with you. Don't you think that there just might be the possibility that you are wrong? That the people with the education and experience in this field might, just might, know more than you?
I was just watching this thread for entertainment value, but the above statement scares the hell out of me that you might actually talk someone into letting you near kids.
At least you have alerted us to who you are and what you are about; we educators from all over the United States.
Not true. Most bullies fully believe that what they are doing is right.
Laughing with them allows them to not have to worry about concealing their behavior. That's not the same thing.
But you also have a great deal of experience and expertise in getting poor results. If the results were great, then that point would be valid. But with such poor results, doesn't that demonstrate that new ideas are needed?
And even if I have alerted you as to what I am about, it doesn't matter.
I only have to convince a single district to adopt my plan. Not the entire US.
OK, either you are really trolling now, or you just don't get it.
How are you not joining in the the bullies, when you sit with them and discuss their ideas to torment another child and laugh along with them? Even though you say that you were able to get the mean girls to usually do something that was not as bad as they originally had planned. You still had information about other children doing something to emotionally (or possibly physically) harm another child and did nothing about it.
Because if I did something about it, I would cut off my ability to reduce the severity of their plans in future idea planning sessions.
You want to think long-term. Not just the next day.
If I leak all the info they share in one session, do you think they will trust me at all to include me in their next session? Of course not.
So, for example, take 10 idea planning sessions and on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the worst, I move an idea of a 7 down to a 2.
Over 10 sessions, that reduces the relative suffering the target experiences by 50 points.
If I squeal after the 1st session, I reduce only by 7 points.
50 points is a much better reduction than 7 points.
So you, as an adult, are hanging out with bullies, being their buddy, and laughing at kids they're laughing at, vocally agreeing with them that a kid they find annoying is "annoying but not THAT annoying," etc....and this is not bullying.
Got it.
In what world is that not giving both the bullies and the bullied the message that an adult is advocating such behavior, and that, therefore, it is okay? And why are you surprised that no school system is going to allow any such tactics, let alone pay you to enact them?
No, because I only ever say what I believe to be true.
If the kid was fully not annoying, then I would say so.
But if I say the kid is not annoying at all and he is, then you are lying to the kids and what reason should they then believe anything I say in the future when they see me lie outright?
It is OK to tell the truth. That message should be given to everyone. If not, you'll keep having the under-the-radar bullying that you have now.
Do you feel better about yourselves because you say it's wrong? Even though that doesn't actually help you solve the problem?
Okay... my middle son is a target for bullies. He has mild emotional delays, is small for his age and is very book smart. He has been assaulted by five boys at once and sexually propositioned by a different boy. I feel I qualify to remark on this.... this proposal.
OP, are you freaking nuts? How is a bully narc going to protect my son? In our school, the assistant principal is the go to guy for the undercurrents of the social stew. He knows what is what.... BUT his hands are tied until there is a definitive ACTION by the bully. So even knowing the players and the currents, an educator can do nothing to the bully until there is ACTION by the bully. Glares, snickers and bowing up while walking the halls aren't ACTIONS that can be disciplined. So even if your wacky plan to document and report the social currents we in place... what good would it do? If the bully takes no ACTION then there is no disciplinary reaction by faculty. So you'll (supposedly) have all this data and nothing you can do with it. I would rather take my tax dollars and spend them on more sports, more arts, more drama classes where kids have a chance to meet and interact with others that share their thoughts and ideals.
It, unfortunately, is human nature to exclude some. As much as it kills me to see my son excluded from the 'in' crowd, my heart warms as he is accepted into his oldest brother's hodge-podge of friends and to hear (from the assistant principal) of the girl and some boys (who he sits with at lunch) who stand up to the boy who made lewd suggestions to my son over lunch. My son, while deeply hurt, doesn't want any one to get into trouble.... even if they are clearly in the wrong, so he doesn't run to adults... or even other kids... he just accepts that some people are ... well... arses.
So dear, OP, what can you do for my son, with your notes and dinners and fake, information grubbing 'friendship'?
The major bullying actions usually have many precursors, such as the glares, snickers, and bows you refer to.
If someone knows about everything involved, then as soon as an actual action is taken, you can discipline aggressively on it, because you will already have a lot of data and a large sample size. If nothing is known, then it's easy to just dismiss the action as an isolated incident or an outlier or to say you don't have enough proof.
And most of the money involved is to just not inconvenience the kids. Your child would still get the food associated with the meal. It's just a practical issue that I can't pay for everyone's lunch each weekend.
Your son is a great example of my plan. He doesn't tell adults because he doesn't want anyone to get in trouble. But since I transcend typical classifications, I would know everything about what is going on.
I'm sure there are some REASONS why your son was attacked. Do you know what they are? Without them, it's pretty difficult to actually help.
I know this might come as a shock to you, since adults are all-knowing and all-powerful, but mean girls don't really care if you approve of their behavior or not.
More of evidence of a very limited grasp of adolescent behavior, of developmental psychology overall, and of functional behavior analysis.
But, of course, you "transcend typical classification."
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