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1. the waiter take the menu away ( you cannot check on the prices when you get the bill, you cannot check if you want to order something additional - except you call your waiter and ask for a menu again)
even if you ask to leave one menu on the table, the waiter will take it away so soon he have a chance
2. when you come with a company the dishes do not arrive for everyone at the same time, or appetizers arrive together with the main dish.
3. in many ( not so elegant places) you get the bill even before you finish the meal
4. if you take a short break from eating, the waiter come from nowhere and snap your plate away ( even if you still have lots of food on it)
5. wait staff will sweep the carpet while the restaurant is still full of people
6. a tip is a recognition for a good service, right? but in many places they add the tip to the bill. Now, don't get me wrong - I always leave a tip for the wait staff, the amount depends how superior was the service, but I do not like to be pushed to do so.
We have noticed whilst living here that there is a VERY different way to use a knife and fork from how we use ours.
When I was a child in primary school 5 - 11 our dinner-ladies would hit our hands with wooden spoons if we didn't hold a knife and fork correctly. ie knife in right hand and fork in left hand with the prongs facing down.
This was also how I was taught at home. (I was also never allowed to put my elbows on the table nor would I leave the table whilst others were eating.)
But nearly everyone I have watched here - even in really high end restaurants eats with just a fork in the right hand. Using the knife to cut to food at the start of the meal and then discarding it. I personally find it quite shocking but accept that there are different etiquette rules here.
Fork etiquette in Western social settings takes two primary forms. The style used mostly in the United States of America, which is sometimes called the zigzag method or American style, differs from the European style (sometimes known as the continental style) which dominates in the rest of the western world including Europe and British Commonwealth countries. Both styles are common in the United States[3] but the zigzag method is almost completely unknown and considered improper outside North America.[4] Eating utensil etiquette - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I wonder if other customers in the restaurants we eat in are looking at us thinking we eat 'oddly' ??
Do Americans think we all eat 'oddly' when they travel to the rest of the world ??
I have also seen groups of people eating directly from sharing plates. Not putting food on their plate, just putting it straight in their mouthes - is this normal ? again in fairly nice restaurants.
My last observation is one that really annoys me. When in restaurants if one person at the table has finished their meal the waiters swoop in to remove the plate. I have lost count in the short time we have been here of how may times I have stopped them in their tracks with a " can you please wait until everyone has finished eating ". Am I being out of line ?? I am prepared to accept that it is just a difference of service if that is the case or is it bad training from the restaurants ?
Using one hand, versus two hands to cut and eat meat is a cultural thing. Back in WWII, the Germans were told that to find Americans who were being billeted in homes to walk by the house at dinner time because you could hear the Americans clanging their knives and forks as they were changing hands while eating. Whether that worked or not, I don't know, but it does demonstrate the differences in how we hold our cutlery versus many other European cultures.
As a child I was taught to cut all the food on the plate at once, then put the knife down. I have since been taught that that was considered rude. I cut each piece as I'm about to eat it, and place the knife down between bites. I do not change hands. I hold the knife with my right and the fork with my left. Maybe because I'm left handed, but a bit ambidextrous. I was always taught it was ill mannered to hold both utensils in your hands while eating.
Holy cow, that knife and fork hand-switching thing is something I've never recognized as something cultural. I always thought it looked so awkward. Maybe that's because I'm left handed and always keep the fork in my left hand, tines down.
What I remember learning is to place used utensils on the plate when one is finished. And that sweeping or vacuuming next to a table full of diners is a pet peeve of mine. It's so rude, like they didn't even notice people were sitting right in from of them.
OP, I surely don't think you're out of line in asking that plates remain on the table until everyone is finished with their meal. I think rushing customers out the door is a part of our 'hurry up and get going' culture which doesn't exactly lend itself to relaxing and enjoyable meals.
I doubt most Americans even eat at the table these days! I use my utensils as the tools that they are. Forks points up and Spoons so they'll hold food! Simple stuff....what etiquette??? Seriously who cares about the way one holds their utensil??
6. a tip is a recognition for a good service, right? but in many places they add the tip to the bill. Now, don't get me wrong - I always leave a tip for the wait staff, the amount depends how superior was the service, but I do not like to be pushed to do so.
Absolutely, the staff should be paid a fair wage. If they go above and beyond in their service you might want to leave a tip! No tips added to bill!!!!!!!! That's constitutes a charge not a gratuity!!
My last observation is one that really annoys me. When in restaurants if one person at the table has finished their meal the waiters swoop in to remove the plate. I have lost count in the short time we have been here of how may times I have stopped them in their tracks with a " can you please wait until everyone has finished eating ". Am I being out of line ??
I don't think you are out of line to assert your preference, but lots of people prefer for the remains of the meal to be cleared away as soon as possible since dirty plates are visually offensive when you are still trying to eat. I don't really understand the purpose in insisting on keeping dirty plates on the table until everyone is done, nor how it could be considered rude to remove the plate of someone who is done with their food.
I don't think you are out of line to assert your preference, but lots of people prefer for the remains of the meal to be cleared away as soon as possible since dirty plates are visually offensive when you are still trying to eat. I don't really understand the purpose in insisting on keeping dirty plates on the table until everyone is done, nor how it could be considered rude to remove the plate of someone who is done with their food.
If you are with 3 others at a table and enjoying conversation someone will inevitably be the last person to finish because they were talking more then everyone else..... ( and not eating whilst talking !) If everyone's plates have been removed then you feel like you are being hurried to finish - personal observation.
I feel uncomfortable if it is me and don't want to put my friends in that position.....
If I am eating quicker that others I will also slow down so we all finish together.
Some people feel like dinner is a race and others take more time.....
We have noticed whilst living here that there is a VERY different way to use a knife and fork from how we use ours. When I was a child in primary school 5 - 11 our dinner-ladies would hit our hands with wooden spoons if we didn't hold a knife and fork correctly. ie knife in right hand and knife in left hand with the prongs facing down.
This was also how I was taught at home. (I was also never allowed to put my elbows on the table nor would I leave the table whilst others were eating.)
But nearly everyone I have watched here - even in really high end restaurants eats with just a fork in the right hand. Using the knife to cut to food at the start of the meal and then discarding it. I personally find it quite shocking but accept that there are different etiquette rules here.
Fork etiquette in Western social settings takes two primary forms. The style used mostly in the United States of America, which is sometimes called the zigzag method or American style, differs from the European style (sometimes known as the continental style) which dominates in the rest of the western world including Europe and British Commonwealth countries. Both styles are common in the United States[3] but the zigzag method is almost completely unknown and considered improper outside North America.[4] Eating utensil etiquette - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I wonder if other customers in the restaurants we eat in are looking at us thinking we eat 'oddly' ??
Do Americans think we all eat 'oddly' when they travel to the rest of the world ??
I have also seen groups of people eating directly from sharing plates. Not putting food on their plate, just putting it straight in their mouthes - is this normal ? again in fairly nice restaurants.
My last observation is one that really annoys me. When in restaurants if one person at the table has finished their meal the waiters swoop in to remove the plate. I have lost count in the short time we have been here of how may times I have stopped them in their tracks with a " can you please wait until everyone has finished eating ". Am I being out of line ?? I am prepared to accept that it is just a difference of service if that is the case or is it bad training from the restaurants ?
I just reread the OP and couldn't help but laugh at the first part. Teaching manners is not something typically done is U.S. public schools. Most of the lunch ladies that I have experienced, either in my own education, or in my kids, were just there to make sure food fights didn't break out. I don't even really recall the actual lunch ladies ever really leaving the kitchen. Usually its either just a couple of teachers assigned to "lunch duty" or at one our my kids schools they hired a mom to come in and control the crowd. Plus many of the kids brought their lunches from home. No utensils required for PB&J, chips and a cookie.
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