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Really -- there are people on that forum with the same problem. You do know when you were born; you know where; you know your birth mother's name.
The "no other relatives in the world" is your alternative to finding a way to convince your birth mother to share the information. There may be other family of hers out there. Where did she go to school? Classmates who knew her at the time? Was she alive in 1940?
I'm not saying those things guarantee results, but there are ways around. Did she tell you anything about him?
I suppose I could try every high school yearbook from all the schools in the city I was born in; my mother was 17 when she had me so I have an approximate age so if I can find her school I can find her friends and talk to them. I am rather certain she was not raped.
Maybe your mother doesnt want the past raked up for loads of reasons....and doesnt understand your yearning for your roots... which is sad , as we all want to know where we came from.... I dreamed for years of meeting my real father... as never knew him.... found his address ten years ago. but he had died two years before.... but from what I heard he wasnt the man I had put on a pedestal..for all those years.... sometimes we're better without knowing ..... but good luck in your quest.. difficult one though if your mum wont give a name... Id ask the older people in the town where you were born, ask around shops.. unmarried mothers homes, etc. they might know something...
There are a lot of teen age girls that made dreadfully stupid mistakes. After they have grown up, they seldom want the detail known.
Do your mother a favor and forget about him. She could lie about him or she could tell you some terrible truth about what he was. Do you reallly want either of those two things to happen?
If you are a male, you can DNA and have it compared to all males for surname -- and maybe you will find a family . That is about as far as you can go. It won't be cheap to search after results. If you are female, you don't have the father's DNA to test, only your mother's.
I am searching for a birth father. The father has a very common name. Any suggestions of where to begin. Birth mother was located and has no idea where he might be as she lost touch at birth.
Last edited by adlez; 10-19-2013 at 09:19 PM..
Reason: misspelling
I am searching for a birth father. The father has a very common name. Any suggestions of where to begin. Birth mother was located and has no idea where he might be as she lost touch at birth.
Have you done a DNA test? It costs $99.00. This has an effective way to find extended family members. Ancestry.com seems to get the most looks. You can then upload your DNA results from Ancestry.com to Gedmatch.Com for free and FTDNA.com for $69.00 for more matches.
I have personal experience and met my birth father this summer for the first time and it was all because of the DNA test.
If you are a male there is a Family Tree genealogical Y-DNA test that can possibly reveal within 5 generations all males who you are most likely related to.
DNA is no panacea. If you have a common name DNA can tell you where your group is found in the world. Many Americans of European descent are found in Western Europe and are of English, Scot, Irish, French, Spanish, and some times German descent due to the Holy Roman Empire wars of the Middle Ages,
You might get lucky, and I hope you are, but you might not. The one thing I am certain is you will learn something about your family history you did not know before you took the test. Many times it is simply amazing.
I guess I'll chime in here, relating to the OP. You can actually obtain copies of US censuses after 1940 but only you can do that with a direct petition to the Census Bureau and you'd need to show proof of identity---but that might not be of help if you did not appear until the 1990 census, thus that already is about 7 years removed from time of birth (assuming you were born in 1983 or 84 as you implied).
I take it you have your birth record and the father is just not named, which is common. Before about 1980 or so many states had rules where illegitimate children's birth record was not public and could only be obtained by that person, but in your case this might not apply.
Like someone said, a y-DNA test can be used in an attempt to find possible surname or match to other people-could provide a clue if you get lucky and other members--even distant cousins of the father have their results online or available to match. Also...and I suggest this more, take a DEEP look into your mother's past, including old police and court files in the city and county where you were born and places she was known to live before and a little after that time. That there could provide clues---if she graduated high school then that too should be examined well as her known family members---in detail.
Long project but you'd be amazed at what can be found...But I do have to emphasize researching the past of your mother and her known family and friends in as much detail as possible...it was only 30 years ago so many people are still could be alive who knew her then.
I'll add: actually, take a look at her high school even if she did not graduate (or if she attended more than one, those too going back at least 2 years before you were born--and 2 years after) or any other known places she might had lived in that time....even 30 years later, someone might still be around to remember something, if not clues in records of some sort.
Last edited by Austin023; 10-21-2013 at 02:53 AM..
Reason: addition
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