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It's dicey. I looked on Google and it appears that every single reunion revolved around one common last name and one common ancestor. I'm so surprised that that is how every single reunion has ever been constructed. When I go to family gatherings, there's always families of my in-laws and cousins of cousins.
My great grandma had 2 different marriages. I was very tempted to just have the reunion for only relatives of my great grandma. But then I realized that my first cousin is going to be bringing cousins that are related to my great grandpa's brother. And they would be related to half of the people under my great grandma, but not the other half. And then I found that my OTHER cousin also knows a cousin on the other side that is so hyped up about coming. And then I even found more on ancestry and their cousins are super excited.
So what am I supposed to do? Separate everyone and have 2 different reunions? Because technically, we have 2 different family trees here. If my great grandma, only had one marriage, then everyone under her would be related.
Look I do have OCD, but the fact of the matter is I may be attempting something that has never been done before. I looked on Google and I can't find anything like it. And now I've got cousins on one side who think they're related to cousins on the other side. It's making me very nervous.
You know the funny thing though? I realized that one of my great uncle's had a similar reunion 40 years ago and invited everyone related to him. So it's almost like I'm doing something similar.
Now for the record, every single person invited is on my grandfather's side. So not my grandmother's side, not my mom's moms side or my mom's dad's side. So I think it's within reason... But then again, 2 trees are 2 trees...
Honestly, this is not the first time in history (including for your uncle 40 years ago) that such a thing has happened. I have a first cousin who gets together with people on her mother's side of the family every July for a "Christmas in July" type of reunion. Believe me, there are all levels of relationship and attachment in that big bunch and nobody is fretting about who is "real" or not.
Most people have more flexibility than you do.
Why don't you try to look at this "reunion" as a BIG PARTY under a BIG TENT where all of these people would be welcome regardless of which tree they're attached to? Isn't the real goal to get to know people you're related to and not to parse their bloodline?
10,000 years back, you all may have a common ancestor anyway.
There's no real rules here. If you want to do a reunion for everyone descended from your great grandma, do it. So what if a few people who are related to half the people there, but not the other half, show up? It would only be weird if they weren't related to anyone there. I'm sure things like that have happened before. A reunion is just a social gathering - there's no rules. If some cousins are confused about who they are related to, a reunion is the perfect time to print off charts showing everyone how they are (or are not) related to everyone else there.
But equally, if it's going to stress you out that much, don't do it. To be frank, it sounds a little like this is more about your anxiety and OCD than it is about genealogy and reunions.
To be clear a lot of historical reunions worked like this. They sometimes are centered around a specific family but they just invite anyone connected from various family friend lines, intermarried lines, and even commonly just put out public ads inviting whoever.
One held by my own ancestor in the early 1900s according to newspapers had 750-1000 attendees. They put a local ad out and many family friends and long time locals came with no relation at all.
Einhander: This is right back where you started with your first two threads. Please go back and re-read them. When you re-read your own posts, try to think of it as if you are reading about someone else's family... see if that gives you a different perspective.
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