Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Is there anyone who has ever moved away from family simply because you wanted to move away? Or have you ever thought about it?
I love my family but I DREAM of the day I can move away from everyone unfortunately. There's too much drama and headache and heartache for me to handle. I can't do it anymore. I used to love being around my family and seeing them but when we moved close to them some kind switch got turned on when I was 15 and I actually began paying attention to the fights and arguments that went on. It's very ugly. Even when we're staying over some kind of fight erupts because of control and power issues. I don't want any part of this. I'm going off to college soon and thinking about going off to a city and state far away from home. Chicago comes to mind. I know it quite well having lived there for 3 years. None of my family lives there. Only good family friends. So I'm thinking about it. I enjoy thinking about it when I have a fight with my mom or anyone else. I can't wait for my day of retribution to come. That's when the tears start rolling and the calls start coming angrily talking about "Why don't you call?! I miss you." Buhahaha.
This is a pretty old example, but in 1946, my newly married parents (my Dad had just got out of the army) moved from the east coast to the midwest where they did not know a soul. Growing up, I barely knew my grandparents because we only visited once a year (if that). Ditto on aunts and uncles. I'm 55 now, and I have first cousins I've never met. That's sad. I'm fortunate I've "adopted" myself to my husband's close-knit family.
I can't wait for my day of retribution to come. That's when the tears start rolling and the calls start coming angrily talking about "Why don't you call?! I miss you." Buhahaha.
Wellll ... that's the wrong (and childish) reason to move, but I'll discount the reason because of your age. What are you going to do, stick out your tongue and say "bwah. there! that'll teach ya!"
But moving because you are ready to get on with your life; perhaps try a new area? That's normal, and may actually turn out to be the right thing for you. I'm the genealogist for the family. It's been surprising to trace the path of my ancestors from one side of the country to the other. Most branches started in Maryland and Virginia, ending up over the generations clear over to California. I'm sure they had their reasons. Some were clearly stated to be the incentive of open land, free for the taking (though they had to watch for those pesky Indians, it wasn't long before they were wiped out ). Others - well, they just seemed to have itchy feet, wanting to see what kind of land was over the next rise or river. It's the way this country grew and developed. And while I'm sure their family was sorry to see them go - with the anticipation in those days that they might never see them again, or even know if they survived the trek - that was just considered the natural course of life.
It may be that a new place is just the right fit for you. I don't believe that people should stay rooted in one spot just because all the rest of their family lives there. We moved from the Midwest to the Southeast for a job relocation. Didn't know a blessed thing about the area, but once we got settled, we found that this is where we belong. Our Midwest families have a hard time wrapping their heads around anyone not wanting to live where they do, while we know we'd be miserable if we had to go back to that part of the country.
I'd say go for it; at least give it a try. It's not like you'd be cut off from your family, not with the continuing advances in communication. Today we have teleconferencing, someday it will probably evolve to holograming one another. And given your age and current wrangling state with your folks, perhaps some distance and growth will make you get along better in the future
I completely understand where you are coming from. I too was once upon a time in a lining situation where family was always in my face and my business. My husband and I finally got to the point where we avoided contact with parents, brothers and sisters (especially my sister, she was such a control freak), even to the point of not going into a business if we knew she was in that particular store. Finally, we were able to sell our house and move away to another town.
I will state that it was the best thing we ever did for ourselves. My only regret was that we didn't do it sooner.
I'm going off to college soon and thinking about going off to a city and state far away from home.
You might want to do some research on the tuition for out of state residents - it generally takes a full year of living in a state, before you qualify for in state tuition, and the difference can be thousands of dollars per semester. It can also impact your ability to qualify for some kinds of financial aid - particularly grants given by the state.
Might be smarter to just pick a city in your state that's a few hours away. It's possible to get away, without going across the country to do it...
Is there anyone who has ever moved away from family simply because you wanted to move away? Or have you ever thought about it?
I love my family but I DREAM of the day I can move away from everyone unfortunately. There's too much drama and headache and heartache for me to handle. I can't do it anymore. I used to love being around my family and seeing them but when we moved close to them some kind switch got turned on when I was 15 and I actually began paying attention to the fights and arguments that went on. It's very ugly. Even when we're staying over some kind of fight erupts because of control and power issues. I don't want any part of this. I'm going off to college soon and thinking about going off to a city and state far away from home. Chicago comes to mind. I know it quite well having lived there for 3 years. None of my family lives there. Only good family friends. So I'm thinking about it. I enjoy thinking about it when I have a fight with my mom or anyone else. I can't wait for my day of retribution to come. That's when the tears start rolling and the calls start coming angrily talking about "Why don't you call?! I miss you." Buhahaha.
If I were you, I wouldn't... because living with family is a LOT cheaper than living by yourself during college... after college, move out (that's what I did)... but 10 years later... guess what... I want my parents to move in with me cause I miss them so much... ironic...
I enjoy being away from my husband's family. Its nice to visit, but when we all lived in the same area, I would find myself drinking during the 'family time visits' to cope... probably not a good sign.. I enjoy their company for a few hours at a time.. anything beyond that and it's just time to go.
Allen, I went to Murray State University in far western Ky in the 70's. One of my suitemates was from Ashland, Ky., just about as far east in Kentucky as you could get. We asked him once, with all the good colleges around the state, why he picked Murray. He didn't get along with his dad, said he never had and never will. His dad said he would pay for tuition as long as he stayed in state. Murray was the furthest he could go and still be in state, so that was his pick!
It might be a little hard at first, but I say go for it and be happy!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
). Others - well, they just seemed to have itchy feet, wanting to see what kind of land was over the next rise or river. It's the way this country grew and developed. And while I'm sure their family was sorry to see them go - with the anticipation in those days that they might never see them again, or even know if they survived the trek - that was just considered the natural course of life.
