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No it wouldn't make any difference. Even if you let it interfere with your social life, you'd be doing so in your own self-interest. Now you are just begging someone to try to persuade you otherwise. Why is that, I wonder? Hey, we heard you. You want to remain single and childless.
Yes I do. I love it. Its such a refreshing way to live. Im not balding, not fat and dont have any grey hairs on my head or any mouths to feed. The stress level involved with raising kiddos is something that I have made a concious and wise decision to not want anything to do with.
A lot of people these days are also making the same decisions.
Unfortuanetly their are people though, who desire to have the "single, childless" lifestyle BUT still cant resist to have kids for their own selfish reasons..thats pathetic.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
That's your own personal business, and I don't think any one who's posted cares. Move on.
No. Maybe people do care, If I persuaded just one person who was considering having kids for their own ego filling, selfish reasons...to NOT have a kid...then Im happy.
I hope I also convinced some people to have some pride and not succumb to pressure from friends and family to have kids even though they dont really want to.
Most kids grow up to be defiant little brats who eventually turn on their parents and cause more headaches then they do good. Adopt a puppy or kitten people...They are much more loyal, and much easier to afford.
My efforts to raise awareness to people having kids for their own selfish reasons will not end here. I am going to begin, blogging about, probably create a website and maybe even write a book at some point about it.
And all of it is gonna be VERY pro, being single and childless and how some people instead, foolishly choose to have kids for their own selfish reasons.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
Even parents who are ready to make a lifelong commitment and who are responsible, caring and mature still have children for their own selfish reasons.
Yeah thats true..its a very egotistical thing to do.
Sandra Bullock brought up a good point, she said people should consider adopting homeless and neglected children.
My main problem is with the people who have kids for their own selfish reasons in mind which is not in the best interest of raising a kid properly. Which effects us all, because the little ones eventually become big ones and wander into society.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
We bring children into the world of teething, disease, broken bones,having to clean up your room and to be nice to your sister, having to "make something of your life and stop being a bum" -- in short, it's a world of strife for even the luckiest person, with but fleeting respites of comfort. With that in mind, life isn't a "gift" as much as an imposition, and it is never in a child's interest to be born. Yes, parents have an obligation to make their child's existence as comfortable as possible, but that is merely making up for the selfish act of reproduction. Even if they abide by that obligation, it doesn't change the fact that their fundamental reasons for having children in the first place were selfish.
Yep. Cant really argue with any of that.
I think life is a lot more hassle then it is good. Im here and will try to make the most of my life, but I have made a wise and concious and UNSELFISH decision to not bring another life into this already overpopulated crazy country.
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Originally Posted by Redisca
That's myopic.Preliminarily, people differ considerably their ideas of how to raise a child properly. Second, in many cases, transferring the children's custody to someone more capable of raising them is actually the responsible and wise thing to do.
And most dont...they end up growing up in awful conditions.
Perhaps that $1 a day program to not have children will catch on more and even be offered to adults.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
A "father figure" isn't a panacea. Some fathers do more harm than good, but it makes sense in light of everything else you've said so far that you would single out "females" to bash for their supposed irrationality and mental instability. You know, us "females" just can't be trusted to make our own reproductive choices!
Females are the ones ultimately responsible for choosing to have the kid or not. Plus I havent heard much cases of men who want kids because there lonely and need attention.
Both men and woman are guilty for choosing to have kids for selfish reasons but in most cases I listed in my initial post, its the females selfish needs looking to be filled.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
The real world isn't quite as simple as you make it out to be.
I am the realist of all realist and I have never claimed the real world to be simple. I have claimed that to many people are mental mushes, and fold under pressure and choose to have kids to feed their own egotistical, selfish reasons, that DO NOT have the childs best in mind.
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Originally Posted by Redisca
If a pregnancy is unplanned, then the parents didn't create it "for their own selfish reasons". They had sex for selfish reasons, which is totally different. Geez, your lack of logic is astounding.
Nope. I think its more your lack of ability to interpert and understand what I am actually saying as opposed to immediatelty trying to put your own hunky dory everyone is good spin on my posts.
Unplanned and Unwanted pregnancys are not exempt from the selfish list!
Deciding to continue the pregnancy and deliver the baby could very well be and is often motivated by very wrong, very selfish reasons!
Welfare money, and goverment/state funded housing, Tax exemptions, attention, saving a relationship, filling that "missing void" in their life.
You seem to want to spin everything in being hunky dory and that everyone will magically do right. Thats not the case. Their are plenty of people in this country who are having children that is not fueled by the desire to be loving and caring, but instead is fueld by ego, selfishness, and in some cases greed.
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Originally Posted by Redisca
As I previously stated, anyone who truly has the child's best interest in mind will not have one. Everyone who's had a child did so for his or her own selfish reasons.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
And, wtf are you "proud" of? If you discover the cure for cancer -- that's something to be proud of. If you reconcile the theory of relativity with quantum mechanics -- that's something to be proud of. But being single and childless isn't an achievement; in fact, it's the easiest thing in the world.
Yeah stay classy NY.
I already told you and everyone else what I am proud of and I will gladly repeat it again.
I am proud of the fact that I am honest, caring, thoughtful, intelligent, drug free, alcohol free, dont give in to pressure to do things I choose not to, or that some people consider "the norm" or "popular"..among many other things in my life.
As it pertains to the topic at hand though, which is People deciding to have children for their own selfish reasons...I am VERY proud that I have enough pride and enough intelligence and enough Intestinal Fortitude to not give in and trade in my beliefs to bring a child in this world for all the wrong, selfish reasons...That ALONE...is an achievement and something to be commended!
This country would be a lot better off if more people had made that decision. Instead of some of the frauds masquerading as "parents" using their own kids for selfish reasons.
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Originally Posted by Redisca
Live however you want to live, but don't expect admiration.
Why not? I should be admired for the fact that I chose not to have kids for selfish reasons that would be of no benefit to the kid.
People shouldnt expect admiration just because they do have kids. In fact its those very people who are part of the problem, the selfish, needy, attention seekers who have kids to feed their ego.
I have had 2 different occasions where I was in relationships with VERY beautiful women that I actually enjoyed being with. Both told me that they would like kids at some point. I told them my feelings about having kids, and on both occasions we both decided that the relationship wasnt worth persuing.
NOW, had I went along with their wants and needs and had a baby with either one of them, I WOULD HAVE BEEN DOING SO FOR MY OWN SELFISH REASONS, IN ORDER TO CONTINUE THE RELATIONSHIP! That would have been no good for anyone involved...For me, the woman, and the child.
As much as I enjoyed being in relationships with them, I did not succumb to there wants and needs to have kids. It has made me better, and probably their life to, because hopefully they found someone who wants to be a good dad to their children.
For that, I should be admired and hopefully set an example to some guys being pressured.
A lot of guys cant resist the pressure and end up having kids for selfish reasons that only benefit them for the short term and up being labled dead beat dads and spending time in jail for not paying child support for the next 18 years.
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Originally Posted by Redisca
"Well thought out" isn't the opposite of "selfish". It's perfectly possible to make a well thought-out decision motivated entirely by one's own selfish reasons.
Yeah and many people do...all the time. The problem arises when it actually effects someone else, and in this case that would a child who is depending on them!!!
Plus when so many people claim to make "well thought out decisions" its often motivated by their own ego and greed and selfishness in mind, not with some one elses best interest.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
For example, a person who feels a void in his life may make a well thought-out decision to reproduce. Given your hermit lifestyle, together with your contempt for other human beings, I find that unlikely that you see other people's lives in a way that would make you capable of understanding them.
Thats fine if people make a well thought out decision to reproduce. Hopefully they are doing so by knowing they are entering a life long commimtment to being a good parent and not just doing so to feed a selfish need.
Your right, I do have a hermit lifestyle and I do have contemp for other human beings. Introverted Misanthrope can best describe me ...and you know what I am damn proud of it. I live a happy and pure life, and have a great set of beliefs that I only wish can be shared by many mental mushy, extroverts.
My life experiences have made me a Introverted Misanthrope and I have never ever been happier in my life! I mean that. Im still young, and good looking and have my whole life ahead of me, but I no longer disguise myself as a extrovert looking to fit it.
That being said, I do "understand" people....I just dont agree with it. I have my beliefs and morals and I dont check them at the door for NO-Body!
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Originally Posted by Redisca
As for what you "read" and "hear", I suggest you lay off talk shows and tabloids, and study something serious for a while.
You amuse me, you really do.
Are you incapable of acknowledging ANY wrong doing by parents having kids for their own selfish reasons???? Can you take a look at the list I posted and defend and or condone having kids under any of those circumstances??? You make it seem like everything is hunky dory with everyone and that bad parenting, fueled by selfish reasoning does not exist. Now THATs Astounding!
I am not a talk show or tabloid junkie. I speak from experiences in Life! Not a sheltered existence in hunky dory world behind pearly white gates. I am in tune with reality. I have been around for a few decades and I have been around the block, I know what goes on out there and I also read and watch the news...Not talk show nonsense...Legit news stories, local and nationwide. You should try it sometime, it might open your eyes. Studying books about the reasons people reproduce is not a good indication on what is happening NOW. Study life. Open your eyes. Its a mess out there.
Watch Nancy Grace sometimes too. That show alone can open the eyes of even the biggest non believers!
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Originally Posted by Redisca
They were more like what? Using caps doesn't make your "argument" any more persuasive than using lowercase.
Neither does insulting me or using "big" fancy" words.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redisca
It's in the child's best interest not to be born. It's in the child's best interest not to experience the horror that is existence and ultimately to die. If anyone was truly altruistic, they would not reproduce and instead adopt orphans. Financially and mentally stable people can be quite selfish. Also, in taking very good care of their children parents likewise pursue their own selfish purposes.
Well I agree with that more then anything else you said, thats for sure and Im shocked that you actually admitted that life isnt a bowl of peaches and a bed of roses.
Aside for my dislike for being "daddy do gooder" If I really wanted to have kids, I dont think I actually would. I wouldnt feel safe and comfortable raising a kid in these sick and perverted times.
No matter how many twist and turns and attempted spinning of my words this topic takes. I will never be convinced, approve or condone ANYONE deciding to have kids for selfish reasons.
Last edited by Edison Winter; 07-28-2009 at 08:17 PM..
Seems like its to define having children as a selfish game.
Seems that just about everyone here openly and gladly admits that.
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Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
How does having children benefit a parent? If anything it costs the parents & benefits the rest of the world in most cases.
It could very well benefit the parent in many selfish, ego, greed filled ways. I am not saying every parent of guilty is that...not at all...I am saying that some people have decided to have kids with very selfish reasons in mind, not the best interest of raising a kid and making a life long commitment to parenthood.
Benefits the rest of the world? Chances are very slim, if there is bad parenting along the way. All inmates in the Prisons in the country were once someones babies. Turn on your local news tonight, I am sure you see some criminals that grew up with parents who should have never had kids.
Some people might think kids will benefit them in these ways
Bottom of the barrel types having kids because welfare gives them more money and provides housing
People having kids in hopes of "saving" there relationship
Looneys having kids because they want attention
People having kids because they simply have a void in there life and want something to do
People having kids for there own status in society, its like there trophy piece
A female who doesnt take her birth control pill on purpose, in hopes of forever being connected to the man shes with and or to receive monthly "child support"
Pressure from family and friends because "everyone your age has one"
Also the people who have kids for the need to fit in with others
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Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
I'm not worried. Its none of my business who has or doesn't have kids.
Its not directly my business either, but I cant say Im not worried about it. I have to go out in public everyday and its a mess out there. I think fraud parents should be exposed for the greedy selfish mush brains they are.
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Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
I'm certain there are others who think the same thing you do.
Thankfully there is Tin, a few people I know personally, lean towards my direction, and I posted many links of people who have written articles on the exact same subject I talked about here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
If you want to talk about having kids for your own selfish reasons you need to start with those who actually pay money to be inseminated or other things & bring a kid into a home that couldn't have one. Theres many thousands of kids needing a good home & its selfish to let them rot & use science to get what you couldn't make naturally while those kids are homeless.
I agree with that. That is a very selfish maneuver that I didnt originally list, and it is not as bad as the reasons I listed but, yet still Very selfish. Instead of adopting a neglected and homeless child and providing it with a great life, they want "Mini Me" clones.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
Then there are single women paying to get pregnant & bring kids into a single parent household just so they can have a kid. Also same sex couples bringing a child into an unatural skewed existance, the last 2 are very obviously selfish & undertaken with zero careing about the life the kid will lead. Its an obvious case of "Lookit what I can do"
I agree with that as well. Very selfish and obviously with the adults best interest in mind, not the kids.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
I apologize but I'm not bothering with the links. You are obviously trying to demonize most normal parenting to justify your choice to not have kids.
NO...That is not the case. I assure you.
My only issue is with people who have kids for their own selfish reasons that involve reasons that are not with the kids best interest in mind but instead to feed an unhealthy ego or need by a more often then not unstable adult.
I have nothing against good parents.....really!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tin Knocker
Possibly you feel you might be being selfish & are trying to find ways to justify your oun selfishness in not being willing to devote 20 years or so to bringing a kid to adulthood. But I dont mind, we need folks like you, there are too many of us, thats obvious. Thanks for your contribution to population control.
Nah, Im really not.
I am fine with my own selfishness. It doesnt effect anyone and it only makes me feel better.I have said my reasons why I choose not to have kids, the main reason is I am not willing to make the lifelong commitment to good parenting.
My problem is not with good parents.
Its with fraud parents who are basically using their own kids to fullfill their selfish wants and needs and who are not good parents, when there children are depending on them to be.
I don't think most people have kids for the reasons you listed. In my experience, people have kids because they had sex. There was no forethought what-so-ever. Not that they never thought about life with kids, just that they made no plans to either not have or to have. But I don't think we should have everyone running off to murder a baby they didn't plan on either. Not to imply that I think abortion should be illegal - I just think it should be used a little more sparingly. Lets use some self control, condoms and birth control for cryin out loud! And some people decide after getting pregnant that they are capable of loving and rearing a child.
I do agree that some poeple have kids for the reasons in your OP. Heck I know a few. But I don't agree that it is the epidemic you make it out to be. And in a lot of cases, these people that had the wrong reason to start out with, can buck up and rear their kids properly.
The sad thing is, that for the people who had the reasons you listed to have kids, they actually believe they are doing something right! They truly see nothing wrong with their thought process.
The reason people are so screwed up anymore is not because of having the wrong reason to have kids, but because no one cares about anyone but themselves anymore. And no one is held accountable for their actions, it's always someone elses fault. See, if it's always someone else fault, than I have to do nothng to correct it, because I can't correct what someone else did, and I can just continue living like a screwed up peice of crap.
Your list is geared towards evil women. Could you add to your list that some men want to get the girl pregnant as a form of control. So the girl will not be able to leave them. Even if they break up, they man knows that she is forever "stuck" with him. And I do know of men who have done this. It's the whole barefoot in the kitchen thing, or if I can't have you no one else can.
Yes I do. I love it. Its such a refreshing way to live. Im not balding, not fat and dont have any grey hairs on my head or any mouths to feed. The stress level involved with raising kiddos is something that I have made a concious and wise decision to not want anything to do with.
Most kids grow up to be defiant little brats who eventually turn on their parents and cause more headaches then they do good. Adopt a puppy or kitten people...They are much more loyal, and much easier to afford.
Actually, I think the main flaw to your logic is right here. You basically have a very self oriented view of the world, the emphasis is all on you.
When you bring up kids you discuss them as an object, and generally with assumed long term negative consequences.
This perception only exist inside of your own head.
Not having any kids is certainly a wise decision for you, because of your perception about how they fit into your life. However, this reality is only your own, each of us has a different perception of the value in raising a family.
Some folks do have kids for questionable reasons, but many of these kids turn out just fine too. Most kids are desired for the best reasons, and will continue to be something that enriches the lives of those choosing to have them.
Some of you make me chuckle...not even "lol" just a slight little chuckle..more like a "heh"
Seriously, did you people I quoted and am about to reply to read all of my posts in this topic? Or did you just skim over a few pages and throw your 2 pennies in?
Your absolutely right about that. Thats a whole other issue for a whole other time. But there is a big difference when raising kids are involved, especially when the childs best interest are not in mind. In other words, the person just wanted a kid not because they are serious about being a good parent...but for other selfish reasons as stated in my list.
I have a lot of things to do at all times, and things much better then posting on a message board, but when I have some spare time I do enjoy posting on City Data. I am not "worried" about what people are doing with their lives, unless they are my immediate family or a close friend. However I do enjoy discussion on various topics and like to raise awareness to things I think arent right and or are a problem with our country.
Really? Ya think so...90% of the world? Thats a shame and its sad and pathetic if thats the case.
Its the mature people who are financially and mentally stable who make a concious decision to have kids and raise them properly and make a life long commitment to being a good parent that I have respect for. And I think those are the only people who should be having kids.
Thats way to young to have kids. She should be a freshman in college focusing on her life and securing her future not having a kid at 19. Its unfortunately all to common though, these days.
I have no problem with abortion and think its there for a good reason. If someone had an unplanned pregnancy or was raped and got pregnant, things like that are a tremendous reason to get an abortion.
A concious decision to not have a kid? Whats wrong with that? That is totally UNSELFISH...Thats like someone like me who doesnt like kids, doesnt want to be a "daddy" and doesnt enjoy anything that has to do with being a parent...making a wise and consious decision that it would not be in anybodys best interest to have a kid!
If I was concerned about my status in society, or was being pressured by family to have children, or wanted to have a kid because I felt lonely and want attention....and then decided to have one...knowing I dont even like kids...That would fall under the category of people having kids for their own selfish reasons! ....See what Im saying here?
I think I said it best in my last paragraph but I will say it again and something to it.
There are many reasons why some people dont want to have kids and I certainly cannot speak or any of them, however I will speak for myself and say..YES I AM SELFISH. I am a very selfish person...But you know what? THERE IS A BIG DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BEING SELFISH WHEN IT IS JUST YOUR OWN LIFE INVOLVED...AND WHEN YOUR ATTEMPTING TO RAISE A CHILD FOR SELFISH REASONS!
I dont want to take away from my own life to raise a kid and be a parent because I have NO desire what so over to make that financial and emotional commitment to being someones daddy....
IT WOULD BE A HUGE DIFFERENCE IF I ACTUALLY WANTED TO HAVE KIDS BUT DIDNT WANT IT TO INTERFERE WITH MY SOCIAL LIFE!
This is a concious well thought out decision that I will never change for me.
Thats the whole point of this topic!
Not every parent has made a wise and consious decision to have a child, and not every parent is ready to make a lifelong commitment to being a resposible, caring and mature parent. Some have just had a child for their own Selfish and Wrong reasons.
Many "parents" are not taking the time and effort to raise a child properly, many "parents" are to busy smoking weed, doing other drugs, in and out of jail, and or dumping their kids off with parents, grandparents or other relatives. while their off clubbing or hanging in bars!
Alot of the females in those situations are young, immature, emotionally and mentally unstable, with little or no money and WAAY more often then not have no "father figure" for the child. And in most cases the baby was an unplanned, unwanted accident who ends up growing up in a disfunctional "family" setting.
Whats worse is that Selfishness is often to blame by these "moms" because some have kids at a young age just for attention.
Do you know they are now actually paying young females in certain areas a $1 a day to NOT GET PREGNANT!...Its true.
Your damn right I did and I am proud of it. Can some of the people who made the choice to have kids for their own selfish reasons without the childs best interest in mind be proud of it?? If yes they should be ashamed of themselves.
And you condone that? You think thats ok for people to bring a child into this world when it is for selfish reasons that only benefit them? As opposed to someone who makes a well thought out decision?
You got that right.
Nope. Not at all.
Because I ALREADY KNOW WHAT I SAY IS TRUE...100 %....BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN EVERY REASON I LISTED FIRST HAND AND UPCLOSE, AND ALSO HEAR AND READ ABOUT WAY MORE OFTEN THEN I LIKE TO.
(caps werent "shouting caps" they are more like...trust me, I have seen this way to often caps"
Its refreshing to hear about other people who feel the same way I do on this subject, which is one of the reasons I started it. I also started the topic to keep the other sides view on it, and Im a bit surprised by some of the responsives saying that "were all selfish..everything we do is selfish"
Thats sad.
Those links I have provided are great sources of refreshment for me and I have never recieved so many Rep points..so yeah it is refreshing to know some people understand what I am saying and believe in it also.
The more people who talk about this, then the more people will maybe sit back for a second and think about their reasons for having a child.
Its a big resposibility and has an effect on the entire society because those kids grow up to be adults.
Because I think its wrong thats why. I think its wrong and stupid to bring another human being in this world when it is for selfish reasons other then the childs best interest.
One of the reasons I care is because I have to go out in Public and have to watch what areas I enter into because some people raise their children so poorly that they grow up to become thugs and criminals and are a nuiscance to society and its sickening.
Not at all. I assure you that. I am very proud of the way I live my life. Pure and with good morals. I am not influenced by others, I do whats best for me and it doesnt effect anyone in the process...unlike some people who have kids out of pressure and end up not raising them properly.
My lifestyle is great. I dont drink, I dont do drugs, Im not a criminal, I was raised with good morals and a good family, I make thoughtful decisions and I speak my mind when I think something is wrong.
Not all of them. I have always said, if the parents are financially and mentally stable and they have the childs best interest in mind..then great, go for it.
However I have no respect for people who just want to fit in with the neighbors or are pressured by friends and family members to have kids, when they dont really want them!
To those people I say, Be yourself, have some courage and pride to make your own decisions, dont just do things to fit in or because everyone else is doing them.
You dont?
Its to discuss and raise awareness to people having children for their own selfish reasons.
Big difference between helping out at a homeless shelter for "selfish" reasons and adding to the countrys population with a child that potentially will be neglected and or raised poorly due to the parents own selfish reasons for bringing them into the world as opposed to making a lifelong commitment to being a good parent.
I guess you can say there is a "good selfish" and a "bad selfish" To me doing something that only benefits YOU and effects others is a "bad selfish"
That can CERTAINLY be debated...but thats a topic to its own.
Dont worry, people will never stop. Well some people like myself will, because I would not want a child to have to endure and see the things that go on in this country.
And yes it is GREAT sense of Validation to see that other people are spreading the word about this subject and have taken the time to raise awareness to it.
Perhaps its easier to put all the links I posted in 1 place, because apparently some of you didnt read them or didnt bother to read them..but you will see that their is other people who think the same way I do on this subject ...and have also posted much of the same reasons to NOT have kid that I posted in my initial post. A lot more people these days, are making a wise conscious decision to NOT have kids, especially for all the wrong reasons!
Five Wrong Reasons to Have a Baby - MSN Relationships - article (http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/articletkt.aspx?cp-documentid=8518916 - broken link)
I don't think most people have kids for the reasons you listed. In my experience, people have kids because they had sex. There was no forethought what-so-ever. Not that they never thought about life with kids, just that they made no plans to either not have or to have. But I don't think we should have everyone running off to murder a baby they didn't plan on either. Not to imply that I think abortion should be illegal - I just think it should be used a little more sparingly. Lets use some self control, condoms and birth control for cryin out loud! And some people decide after getting pregnant that they are capable of loving and rearing a child.
I do agree that some poeple have kids for the reasons in your OP. Heck I know a few. But I don't agree that it is the epidemic you make it out to be. And in a lot of cases, these people that had the wrong reason to start out with, can buck up and rear their kids properly.
The sad thing is, that for the people who had the reasons you listed to have kids, they actually believe they are doing something right! They truly see nothing wrong with their thought process.
The reason people are so screwed up anymore is not because of having the wrong reason to have kids, but because no one cares about anyone but themselves anymore. And no one is held accountable for their actions, it's always someone elses fault. See, if it's always someone else fault, than I have to do nothng to correct it, because I can't correct what someone else did, and I can just continue living like a screwed up peice of crap.
Your list is geared towards evil women. Could you add to your list that some men want to get the girl pregnant as a form of control. So the girl will not be able to leave them. Even if they break up, they man knows that she is forever "stuck" with him. And I do know of men who have done this. It's the whole barefoot in the kitchen thing, or if I can't have you no one else can.
Men wanting to get the girl pregnant as a form of control, is a VERY selfish reason and I totally agree.
It sickens me when people have children in hopes of using them as a bargaining tool.
I hope you do write a book. In fact, I can't wait for you to try. If you manage to get it published, and I hope you do, I can't wait for the reviews. My crystal ball says it is going to be a blast.
At this point, you have nothing but finger pointing. You have no real research, you have no idea of the history and you have no "real" idea of the problems with the children. You don't know who steps in and you don't know the problems associated with the kids when they are taken from the parents and I don't think that you know what they are when they hit the age of 18 and what they are left with.
You need to get off your behind and do some valid research. You need to decide right away who your target audience is. At some point in your book, usually this occurs in the last two chapters you must show some attempt at solving the problems.
If you don't, you will be nothing more than somebody who rants and is uneducated. You will be deemed as selfish as in attempting to make a buck and inciting and ignorant. So, your credibility is on the line. Right now. By all means start a blog and fail to attempt to write a book. At that point, you can avoid any actual research but still rant. We call that "LAZY". Especially, if you have not even taken the time to evaluate proposed solutions that are already out there.
Remember you need to target your audience. I promise you that if you wrote a book with what you have at this point no one that works in the mental health system, law enforcement, corrections, lawyers, probation/parole, CASA or DCS will buy it.
Welcome to the game. The onus is on you. Put up or shut up. Start researching. Dig deep.
Edited for: I'll even try to follow your little blog. At some point, your going to actually have to make a decision of exactly how much you truly care about these issues and are actually putting forth that effort or you don't care one bit and like to hear yourself talk. At that point, you will be in that camp of yet one more person who thinks that what they have to say is valuable. So, choose wisely.
Last edited by Pandamonium; 07-29-2009 at 12:50 AM..
I hope you do write a book. In fact, I can't wait for you to try. If you manage to get it published, and I hope you do, I can't wait for the reviews. My crystal ball says it is going to be a blast.
At this point, you have nothing but finger pointing. You have no real research, you have no idea of the history and you have no "real" idea of the problems with the children. You don't know who steps in and you don't know the problems associated with the kids when they are taken from the parents and I don't think that you know what they are when they hit the age of 18 and what they are left with.
You need to get off your behind and do some valid research. You need to decide right away who your target audience is. At some point in your book, usually this occurs in the last two chapters you must show some attempt at solving the problems.
If you don't, you will be nothing more than somebody who rants and is uneducated. You will be deemed as selfish as in attempting to make a buck and inciting and ignorant. So, your credibility is on the line. Right now. By all means start a blog and fail to attempt to write a book. At that point, you can avoid any actual research but still rant. We call that "LAZY". Especially, if you have not even taken the time to evaluate proposed solutions that are already out there.
Remember you need to target your audience. I promise you that if you wrote a book with what you have at this point no one that works in the mental health system, law enforcement, corrections, lawyers, probation/parole, CASA or DCS will buy it.
Welcome to the game. The onus is on you. Put up or shut up. Start researching. Dig deep.
Calm down, I have no plans to write a book about this or anything else for that matter. I was exaggerating about the book part.
Blog...maybe.
I dont know anything about writing a book and I dont think I have enough patience to go through all the mumbo jumbo chain of command that goes along with it. Plus I am more focused on other things in my life at the moment, so blogging is much more convenient for me at this time.
If anything, I will put a lot of effort into my blogs.
What classifies as an unselfish reason to have kids? I think some good points are made here, but I think I would want kids one day because it would be a fulfilling addition to my husband and I's (probably worded wrong) life together. Sure, we could be happy without kids...I mean we don't have them now, but I guess there is something a little selfish of wanting a little baby to give all your love to, because it is nice to love someone!
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Given your hermit lifestyle, together with your contempt for other human beings, I find that unlikely that you see other people's lives in a way that would make you capable of understanding them.
...and you know what I am damn proud of it. I live a happy and pure life, and have a great set of beliefs that I only wish can be shared by many mental mushy, extroverts. 
...and have also posted much of the same reasons to NOT have kid that I posted in my initial post. A lot more people these days, are making a wise conscious decision to NOT have kids, especially for all the wrong reasons!
Calm down, I have no plans to write a book about this or anything else for that matter. I was exaggerating about the book part.