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I have the same problem all my life. My ENT tells me many people have the same issue and nothing will help (diet...). He uses a small suction device every 3 months and that takes care of it.
ENT is Chinese. She used a long vacuum type probe but every time she turned on the motor my daughter would flinch and bring her shoulder up which kept the doc from doing the job. She says it hurts and I'm sure it does but if I had been there I think I would have read her the riot act or held her down myself.
Doc said the wax has probably sealed to her ear drum and if it (wax) is pulled it hurts. We are to use the softening agent 2-3 times a day and go back Monday. I will be with her then and will have a good talk with her before we go. This is a kid who is afraid to even swallow a Tylenol!
Doc said her fear is worse than her pain and only other solution is to have outpatient surgery with being put all the way under! No way are we doing that.
Our Korean daughter had bad ear wax problems as a child too. Once I took her to the doctor who used a water pik to blast it out of there. I could not believe what that child had in her ear. It was like panning for gold. She held up a basin to her ear and chunk after chunk of golden hard ear wax came out. I tried doing it myself at home some months later and we got the entire kitchen soaking wet. Strangely she is an adult now and has had no problems since childhood.
Sedating her might be an excellent solution. Something like Propofol just puts the patient to sleep. They wake up feeling great, and life is good again.
Xanax, Valium any anti anxiety med will help her if she lets them. The only problem with them is that if she's anxious when she takes it her adrenaline will already be high and she won't feel the anxiety relieving effects of the drug. She'll sleep like a log when the procedures over though. If she does willing take one try and let her rest at the doctors and try to keep her anxiety down. I don't really support lying, but maybe you could tell her the doc's just going to look but not do anything. It might help lowering her adrenaline so the meds can kick in.
My mother had hard ear wax and I used to have the job of taking a tweezer and pulling the hardened ear wax out of her ear. I couldn't believe how hard it actually was and how long I'd have to pull to get the whole mess out. Fortunately my moms ear wax was close to the open canal so I didn't have to put the tweezers in deep. I don't recommend that or bobby pins either. But, I didn't know any better.. looking back.. I could have broken her ear drum or something.
I would consider going for something fun like a soda pop or a little (small) ice cream before the procedure and give her the ativan or whatever is prescribed then, and then heading directly to the office (you'll have it in her system about an hour before hand). It will calm her down to get a treat beforehand and you can give her the medication then, and it should be working when you get her to the office.
You want to avoid any stronger sedating medication in children because of the risks. Benadryl is less likely to be so helpful in this instance (though it could make her very tired as another poster suggested). The only risk with that is that some pediatric patients have the opposite reaction and get anxious or hyper on benadryl, and this would not be what you want. However, if you cannot get a prescription for ativan, talk with the provider about alternatives, as sometimes antihistamine class meds are used for acute anxiety with fairly good effect.
Mild liquid-detergent with no coloring, fragrances or other added crud. Fill your the ear-canal while laying on your side.........stay there while watching TV. Rinse and repeat a couple of times.....kinda slow, but it does work.
Putting oil into your ears, I have gotten inflamed ear-canals from doing so.
For 4 days we used Debrox twice a day and got a script for diazepam. We picked her up from school and gave her 4 mg of diazepam by cutting the two tablets in half. We had packed a yogurt and spoon and she filled the spoon with yogurt, I poked a piece of pill in it and she swallowed it without any trouble. I knew this was not the time to mess with teaching her AGAIN how to take pills with water.
Half an hour later she didn't feel any different but we went ahead with the procedure (vacuum). Doc said it was obviously much softer and she proceeded to remove the FIRST LAYER of softer wax. Then doc gave her another 2 mg of diazepam and more Debrox to soften the really HARD second LAYER and Oh Boy!!!! you would not believe what she got out. Three little dark brown stones and a bunch of other gunk. No wonder she couldn't hear!
So now we have a very mellow and affectionate girl on our hands and we are all very relieved the whole ordeal is over. Doc said Debrox or Colace will work just fine on a regular basis. We put it on our family calendar for the first of every month.
Glad it got taken care of! I have a lifelong problem with excessive ear wax. While not a "wimp", I have to get it taken care of every 3 months or I go deaf. TG my ENT is a fun guy and we can joke. "Oh, no, here is that lady with the waxy ears again". LOL
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