Would a Northeasterner fit in TN? (Memphis, Knoxville: appointed, real estate, 2014)

[poety]

Originally Posted by Shalako

Depends. An arrogant, superior attitude will not fit in. Southerners in general are a get along group and don't accept others who don't act accordingly. Note that I'm not accusing you of having an obnoxious attitudeI don,t know you. Indeed parts o f the South, Tn being no exception, could stand some improvement, but telling the locals that they are a bunch of backward, ignorant rednecks is a guaranteed prescription forruining one's day. In small rural locales you may never be accepted into the inner social circles having not been born and lived all of your life there. I don't think that they are trying to snub anyone, it's just that most of these people tend to associate with those who have lived there their entire lives. Parts of eastern Tn. Have seen a lot relocation from other areas of the Country over the last some Years so the situation may now be somewhat different at present. I grew up in a very rural area of Alabama, but left after High school and have seldom been back. I lived other places and did other things. When I do go back for visits, I am receivedwarmly enough, yet relationships are not the same due to my different background. It's a natural thing. How would someone from a rural Tn.background be accepted in the Northeast?

Hi Shalako,

I'm not really sure to be honest with you - there haven't been a lot of transplants that I've met from the south - maybe because of the weather? LOL - When I was in SC the people from that area had no desire to come north - and I'm not sure what the reason was, I never cared to ask. There would be very few churches compared to the south, but then again, people up here tend to keep their religion to themselves and I've known people a LONG time and never knew they went to church every Sunday. I personally do a lot of donating to my church but don't attend often and do so anon. just because thats how it was always done when I was growing up.

I am not white so that was one of my many concerns in TN about being accepted, and as I said - I have a daughter so I'd want her accepted as well - tahnks for sharing your experience.

[jabogitlu]

I grew up in northeast TN and turned out just fine. I'm not religious, but I'm not not religious, either. I guess I just don't think about it? My dad has never really talked about religion either, but my mom is a believer. There's room for all kinds of folks in east TN. We're a live and let live type of folk. Of course, the key phrase is the "let live" part, and you must realize that a STAGGERING majority of people believe in the Judeo-Christian experience, so just be ready. You might get asked where you go to church, or if you'd like to come to their church. It's part of the social fabric, but you'll still be respected no matter your response.

Of course, there is the 1 idiot out of every 100 people who thinks that because you don't believe exactly like him/her, that you are doomed to a fiery hell. Those aren't limited to the South.

Being a "variety" (in your case, not white) is also a non-issue. I had many friends of all types of beliefs/colors/ethnicities in Johnson City. Whites, blacks, Pakistanis, Chinese, Muslims, atheists, pot smokers, churchgoers, etc. Growing up in little podunk Greeneville, our high school football coach was a white man with a black wife and mixed kids. It wasn't an issue.

[poety]

Originally Posted by jabogitlu

I grew up in northeast TN and turned out just fine. I'm not religious, but I'm not not religious, either. I guess I just don't think about it? My dad has never really talked about religion either, but my mom is a believer. There's room for all kinds of folks in east TN. We're a live and let live type of folk. Of course, the key phrase is the "let live" part, and you must realize that a STAGGERING majority of people believe in the Judeo-Christian experience, so just be ready. You might get asked where you go to church, or if you'd like to come to their church. It's part of the social fabric, but you'll still be respected no matter your response.

Of course, there is the 1 idiot out of every 100 people who thinks that because you don't believe exactly like him/her, that you are doomed to a fiery hell. Those aren't limited to the South.

Being a "variety" (in your case, not white) is also a non-issue. I had many friends of all types of beliefs/colors/ethnicities in Johnson City. Whites, blacks, Pakistanis, Chinese, Muslims, atheists, pot smokers, churchgoers, etc. Growing up in little podunk Greeneville, our high school football coach was a white man with a black wife and mixed kids. It wasn't an issue.

Thats awesome to hear!! Our saying here in NH is live free or die and goes right along with the whole live and let live theory, thank you for your post jabogitlu!

[ColdAilment]

modcut

To answer your original question I'm not sure how you may feel out of place in Tennessee? You say you are black and from New Hampshire? Well, one thing I can tell you right off the bat is that your accent will stick out, especially amongst most of the black folk. I don't think it will be an issue, but it will be a sign that you aren't from around there, you may just get questioned on where you are from.

Southerners are very religious, and probably not the same denomination as you. Baptism reigns supreme here, Catholic are few, unless you go to the coast. Joining a church is very central to getting on good terms and learning the local community.

I'm not sure if you are bothered by the possibility of racial tensions in the south or not, but I can assure you it is not as bad as it is played out to be on television and the media. This is the 21st century, yeah, things have a long ways to go, but it's not the 60's anymore.

Weather is a helluva lot better here, snow is rare, winters are short, rain is aplenty and so is the warmth and sunshine.

[Serious Conversation]

Being AA in rural New England is itself a rarity - I just came back from Burlington, MA, but spent most of my weekends in Maine and NH, and it's at least as white there as it is here. Moving to somewhere where there are comparatively few transplants (compare the relocation threads on the Tri-Cities board vs. Nashville) and being kind of rare anyway is going to be a bit of culture shock. That's not good or bad, but most areas aren't going to have a lot of experience with an AA NH resident.

I grew up in Kingsport and we had a few Catholic students in our class. They were definitely an oddity, but I don't think they were discriminated against. There are some fundamentalist churches that believe Catholics are not Christian and are thus damned. I don't think it would be a big issue as long as you kind of keep it to yourself among people you know are of primitive Baptist faiths, Assemblies of God, Pentecostals, etc. IMO, religious issues were bigger a few years ago before the economy tanked.

Race shouldn't be a big issue, but there are still plenty of folks flying rebel flags. It seems I see more rebel and Gadsden flags than I do the state flag. I don't think people would say something to your face, but you do need to be comfortable with seeing rebel flags and other southern pride type things.

[queenladybug817]

My sister was telling me about a gal she was talking to about the race thing here in Eastern TN. She was AA and Hispanic mixed and never had any problem with folks around here, pretty much not even a factor with people. It seemed that people were more discriminating towards what they considered "white trash" or poor people that were lazy and didn't try or care. Being poor wasn't the factor, it was the attitude the people had.

She moved to Nashville (where my sister works) and was amazed at how different it was in Middle TN vs here with the race thing. She had more things said to and about here there than she expected, especially with Nashville being the "big city". She eventually got fed up with it and moved back to the Tri-Cities.

I think you might get more questions from folks about the NH part. Many people down here in the south have a hard time grasping how rural Upstate NY, Vermont, NH and Maine are.

[lagoon7]

Originally Posted by poety

I'm a true blue Northeasterner but would love to relocate to a slightly better climate for my horses so I can ride more and have more land with less tax burden. Is NE TN considered the "deep south"? I enjoyed FL but it was just too hot in the summer, lived in SC and really loved the ppl FROM sc BUT I couldn't stand most of the transplants (oh the irony!!) I don't mind ignorance as long as they leave me alone - true libertarian lol

Do you think NE TN would be a fit? I'm coming from NH if I decide to move and though I love it here, I find the gray days are getting to me and I need more sunshine and "outdoor" time without the severe overcast for 6 months/ year. That combined with ridiculous housing taxes and land prices I'm thinking of a move...

Thanks for any input!

I think you'll find that is the prevailing attitude here. As far as the church thing, I haven't been asked once since I moved here what church I go to, what denomination I am, etc. Our neighbors invited us to go with them to their church when we first moved here, but that was it.

[poety]

Thanks for your replies everyone - we are actually not black, we're brown, most people think we're spanish and try to speak spanish to us in the bigger cities LOL but in all reality we're Hawaiian I'm in rural No. NH and I've had some racist experiences up here - more like out of ignorance to be honest; so that doesn't bother me too much but I definitely don't want my daughter subjected to anything that would make her insecure as she grows. Growing up nowadays is hard enough with all these shootings, etc so I want to give her the best chance at a place she'll feel welcome and not looked upon differently. It is worrisome since we're not only brown, we're Catholic. In all reality, I don't think about it much in day to day here - we spend most of our time with our horses, and animals, I work, she goes to school, we live a quiet life. But it has been hard for her even up here, making new friends, etc. Its a very small rural town and its so hard for her to break the ice to be accepted. We didn't experience this in the southern part of the state but have definitely experienced it up here. Its taken me a year to just start to make friends. Unfortunately, we used to live in Florida and I really missed the NE a lot - we relocated up here and now I'm finding that the winters are just too long for me. I long for four seasons but need a milder winter and a low tax burden state. I'm a single mom so it would also be nice to relocate somewhere to possibly have a life outside of just work. If we were to relocate - what part of TN would you guys recommend given our lifestyle? We would definitely need to be able to get about 10-20 acres for our horses and I'd like very much to be near a bigger city for the access to what it offers. Maybe TN wouldn't even be a fit and you guys have some other ideas on good states to relocate to? LOL Thanks again

[DaveinMtAiry]

I could be wrong but reading this thread makes me wonder why you feel TN would not be a fit? Is it that you are looking for a larger city than JC?

[queenladybug817]

I have to agree with Dave. Some of your big desires seem to be met. Low tax burden (overall anyway) and 4 seasons with a mildish winter, especially compared to the Northeast. Plenty of rural area here as well. I think race and religion will be minimal concerns here for you, no worse than pretty much anywhere else in the country and IMO, less so than a lot of the south with race. Besides the Tri-Citites, Knoxville could even work for you. I personally like it better here, because I think the views are absolutely gorgeous, but maybe you'd like a larger city nearby? You only mention wanting a life outside of work, not what kind of job need you may have. That could be a big factor, as different opportunities will be available in different areas of the state.

Best bet would be to plan a trip. It would be super easy to spend a couple of days in the Tri-Cities, then Knoxville, and even a pitstop to Gatlinburg (for Dollywood for your daughter?)