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So you stayed home full time with your children until the youngest was 5?
My wife stays home... didn't even want them in daycare/after-school when they started Kinder. We've found that it gets no easier once they hit school. There's consistently something going on during the day that involves the kids. If you work fulltime you're missing most events... and then of course there's Summer time.
My wife stays home... didn't even want them in daycare/after-school when they started Kinder. We've found that it gets no easier once they hit school. There's consistently something going on during the day that involves the kids. If you work fulltime you're missing most events... and then of course there's Summer time.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but having to go to work during the daytime is not a Long Island-specific phenomenon. It's generally called being a professional.
My wife stays home... didn't even want them in daycare/after-school when they started Kinder. We've found that it gets no easier once they hit school. There's consistently something going on during the day that involves the kids. If you work fulltime you're missing most events... and then of course there's Summer time.
So your children are raised by someone else (I.e. Not you). And I guess by definition you're missing most events. Got it.
While I agree with Mike about a stay at home raising their own is a better life for child and parent, the idea that it's less prevalent on LI than in Charlotte is silly. Can anyone find the stats.
While I agree with Mike about a stay at home raising their own is a better life for child and parent, the idea that it's less prevalent on LI than in Charlotte is silly. Can anyone find the stats.
MikeyKid will simply retort that the COL is cheaper in NC and therefore easier for one parent to stay home. Because of course it is simply 'impossible' to have that situation on LI now. ALL households have 2 full time working parents here! EVERYONE apparently has a 3 hour commute to work and never sees their kids as well.
MikeyKid will simply retort that the COL is cheaper in NC and therefore easier for one parent to stay home. Because of course it is simply 'impossible' to have that situation on LI now. ALL households have 2 full time working parents here! EVERYONE apparently has a 3 hour commute to work and never sees their kids as well.
Well, obviously not. However, with the "make ends meet" number for a family of 4 around $90K on Long Island that means for an average middle class living with one parent working that parent needs to earn close to 6 figures. I know quite a few families where the breadwinner earns $75-80K, and the spouse works part time, juggling the kid/kids with help from the grandparents.
Once you start getting into the better school districts, with a "nicer" home that you pay north of $600K for, it starts to get to a point where it's more common for both parents to work. One might have a work from home job, but both parents work.
Well, obviously not. However, with the "make ends meet" number for a family of 4 around $90K on Long Island that means for an average middle class living with one parent working that parent needs to earn close to 6 figures. I know quite a few families where the breadwinner earns $75-80K, and the spouse works part time, juggling the kid/kids with help from the grandparents.
Once you start getting into the better school districts, with a "nicer" home that you pay north of $600K for, it starts to get to a point where it's more common for both parents to work. One might have a work from home job, but both parents work.
Yes but 2 working parents is common nationwide. It is not just a Long Island thing. Tons of stats out there to support this.
But it is the two income trap. My wife quit work a few months after our fist one was born and we just bought a fixer upper house and I was making absolute peanuts.
My wife's female cousins who worked full time husbands all made like 20-50K a year more than I did were shocked that she quit work and was going to raise a family on a 60k a year income and this was 2001.
Second kid came in 2002!! Cars were getting older by the day with wife still driving her "single" car from back in the day.
Huge rock on my back and we had 9/11 to boot and recession of 2002. Guess what the heavy rock and a supportive wife let me work as much an as hard as possible, first in, last out, ready to travel for work at a moments notice, checking emails at all time. I was the guy mowing my own lawn and doing home repairs on Sunday after a 60 hour work week.
While the other dual income guys with kids, running for door, no sense of urgency as if laid off the other still had a job, running to pick up child care. Taking vacation at worst times to coordinate with wifes schedule. And bosses sensed this. Many did not survive the 2002 recession and most did not survive the 2009 financial crisis.
By 2009 my salary was more than double any of the dual income couples my age.My wife stays home and we saved well into the six figures alone on day care, take out food, commuting,
Meanwhile the dual income men are sitting in cubes in middle management jobs because they never ever put work first and did it for a long enough period of time. The boat has sailed.As I drink my morning coffee, in my large corner office overlooking the water from a high floor I enjoy looking out at the male cube dwellers whose careers never got to far as they did not want to work in their 30's to early 40's where for most firms that is the meat of the career. They dont promote folks to big jobs between 21-28 so might as well enjoy and by the time you are late 40s the boat has sailed.
But it is the two income trap. My wife quit work a few months after our fist one was born and we just bought a fixer upper house and I was making absolute peanuts.
My wife's female cousins who worked full time husbands all made like 20-50K a year more than I did were shocked that she quit work and was going to raise a family on a 60k a year income and this was 2001.
Second kid came in 2002!! Cars were getting older by the day with wife still driving her "single" car from back in the day.
Huge rock on my back and we had 9/11 to boot and recession of 2002. Guess what the heavy rock and a supportive wife let me work as much an as hard as possible, first in, last out, ready to travel for work at a moments notice, checking emails at all time. I was the guy mowing my own lawn and doing home repairs on Sunday after a 60 hour work week.
While the other dual income guys with kids, running for door, no sense of urgency as if laid off the other still had a job, running to pick up child care. Taking vacation at worst times to coordinate with wifes schedule. And bosses sensed this. Many did not survive the 2002 recession and most did not survive the 2009 financial crisis.
By 2009 my salary was more than double any of the dual income couples my age.My wife stays home and we saved well into the six figures alone on day care, take out food, commuting,
Meanwhile the dual income men are sitting in cubes in middle management jobs because they never ever put work first and did it for a long enough period of time. The boat has sailed.As I drink my morning coffee, in my large corner office overlooking the water from a high floor I enjoy looking out at the male cube dwellers whose careers never got to far as they did not want to work in their 30's to early 40's where for most firms that is the meat of the career. They dont promote folks to big jobs between 21-28 so might as well enjoy and by the time you are late 40s the boat has sailed.
Thanks for this. Your story makes a really great point.
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