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It's just a changing world to me. Right now, I think a lot of the things that were buried and kept hush are all coming to the surface at alarming rates and it's overwhelming a lot of people causing them to be increasingly sensitive. But I don't think it has to do with poor coping skills. It's just we're receiving so much...heavy information at one time that it can really weigh down on the psyche and people are acting out because they just don't know what else to do.
"...they just don't know what else to do." Well, that, by it's very definition is what I mean by having poor coping skills. The term 'poor coping skill' should not be taken in offense. It's simply describing the ability of one to cope. Good, Fair or Poor: in this case, their coping skills are poor.
"...they just don't know what else to do." Well, that, by it's very definition is what I mean by having poor coping skills. The term 'poor coping skill' should not be taken in offense. It's simply describing the ability of one to cope. Good, Fair or Poor: in this case, their coping skills are poor.
Here is a link to an article on "emotional resilience": Psychological resilience - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. It is easier to fix you then the rest of society. I know someone that is the result of an overindulgent mother who, I believe for her own benefit, smothered the child to a sort of psychological death. The person has nearly no coping skills and is totally dependent on getting a "feed" from outside sources and totally destroyed when this is not positive. Should bullies be punished? Of course. Does it do any good? I don't think so because most of those kids grow up to be bullies in the work place or in the neighborhood.
Here is a link to an article on "emotional resilience": Psychological resilience - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. It is easier to fix you then the rest of society. I know someone that is the result of an overindulgent mother who, I believe for her own benefit, smothered the child to a sort of psychological death. The person has nearly no coping skills and is totally dependent on getting a "feed" from outside sources and totally destroyed when this is not positive. Should bullies be punished? Of course. Does it do any good? I don't think so because most of those kids grow up to be bullies in the work place or in the neighborhood.
Yes, that's what I was alluding to in my post but you hit the nail on the head with your choice of words. Resilience. I think a lot of people are just at a time where they're being bombarded with stuff that weighs heavily on the psyche so they haven't been able to take the reigns just yet. We won't know how people, as a whole, are really coping until a while after, by assessing how much we've changed, adapted, and function.
In terms of bullies, I've had a clinical instructor in a hospital who was mean to me because she was experiencing burn out in her job. She was unhappy with herself and it use to really get to me when she took it out on me, and I actually cried a river when I made it to my car one day. It's funny to me, that we complain so much about getting rid of bullies, and then when we get into the work world, there's a ton of them and they're actually endorsed and encouraged. Fortunately for me, this lady has changed her tone with me.
I was bullied as a kid by a girl who used to rub my face in the snow. I don't have good coping skills but it has nothing to do with her.
My sister took her daughter out of school due to being bullied and she is being home schooled. I think that was a mistake. Her daughter was suicidal but are you going to become suicidal every time someone is mean to you in your life? I think not.
My sister took her daughter out of school due to being bullied and she is being home schooled. I think that was a mistake. Her daughter was suicidal but are you going to become suicidal every time someone is mean to you in your life? I think not.
But you know I can see how the pressure would build for kids that already have problems with their own self-esteem. It can be a hard time for even the most well adjusted young person. Whether some might not see taking the kid out of the school as right, that's probably what I would have done too. Everyone isn't built the same nor is each kids home situation the same, where there may be love or just more put downs. It can be an almost constant torment every day in school for these kids and it doesn't stop there these days with "social" sites like FB. It almost seems like the girls are worse than boys with the constant needling at someone. It used to be a guy might have to face the bully to have the torment stop. Things are different today. Now there might be a gang of evil kids following one child around during the school day mocking every step they take. Are kids talking to their parents. I suppose it depends on what kind of relationship they have with them. Personally I think home schooling is a better option for many kids. Schools can pigeon hole children, stifle creativity, and I worry about the quality of teachers as well.
Have you ever seen any of the videos on YouTube reference a child that was bullied to death. I came across one, and you'd have to be a stone to not feel water in your eyes watching that. Still there were some 500 dislikes, why because it pointed to the problems and told the story of ones sister, because they advised depression is real and to tell someone if you are being bullied. I found it a moving video, so you have to wonder about people, I certainly do. I'm glad to see a more proactive stance from the schools, but it comes a little too late for some of those poor kids. To think that evil kids capable of such vile emotions will be parents, is in itself a scary thought.
Psychological resilience depends greatly on the individual. Factors such as genetics, and ones environment play a role as well. From that article on Wikipedia quoted, "There is also controversy about the indicators of good psychological and social development when resilience is studied across different cultures and contexts". "People who experience acute trauma, for example, may show extreme anxiety, sleep problems, and intrusive thoughts. Over time, these symptoms decrease and recovery is likely. This realm of research shows that age and the supportive qualities of the family influence the condition of recovery". Well duh.
Misty, I hope things get better and the child can move forward and be happy.
I think it's important to retain a certain degree of "sensitivity." If we "turn the other cheek" and make everything "okay" how can we recognize abuse? Or take a stand against abuse?...I think kids and adults need to have a set of standards when it comes to "fair" or "unfair treatment."...When people become passive and compliant their "oppressors" gain "free reign." And the "oppression" continues because no one stands-up against it...Complaining alone isn't usually enough. At some point "stronger action" needs to be taken...I think it's important to teach kids how to get along in groups. (Learn social-skills.)...And I think kids need to realize that they are not going to be the absolute "center" of everyone else's "universe." (And receive "special treatment" or "favors" etc.)...But I think it's also important to tell (and teach) kids that they deserve to be treated "fairly." (With dignity and respect.) So they will be able to recognize abusive behavior and report it to adults when need be...And hopefully the adults around them will take action to stop the abuse and intervene.
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