Struggling to make friends after overcoming depression (pressure, take, get)
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Age 23. I was a very sociable girl before I slipped into depression four years ago, when I moved to another country. What made things worse was I was in an abusive relationship for two years during that time. I did make a lot of friends but no one I could talk to on a daily basis or hang out with frequently, apart from my abusive ex. I started to get a lot better mentally a year ago and be able to find myself again. I was more involved in social activities but I still struggled a lot to make and keep friends.
I love playing [insert musical instrument here, trying not to reveal my identity on here]. I travel a lot and make friends in hostels. I join hiking groups and go hiking occasionally. I also try and explore new things in my city. I'm not sure if the aftermaths of four years of depression are still keeping people from seeing me as a great potential friend. I just still feel pretty lonely especially now I'm out of univeristy. Any advice would be appreciated
Good that you value yourself enough to leave a bad relationship.
For now focus on staying healthy and balanced. Do things you enjoy & people will be drawn to you. Take a class or learn something new. Music is a great way to meet other people. Just relax and don't put extra pressure on yourself. It will take awhile to heal.
You sound like you have really grown and healed quite a bit. Keep doing what you are doing and slowly things will come together even more. It can be frustrating not to see a difference but it's really true that little by little changes will happen. Wishing you strength to keep up the good work. You will be rewarded.
I'm so happy for you having such a turnaround. When I went through a depression in my 20s, I ended up getting a retail job at a store I loved. I met many coworkers who had similar interests. 15 years later, they are still my close friends, even though I've moved 2,000 miles away since then. I've made other friends through dog sports. And others through my writing group.
Meetup.com has been a huge boost to my social life.
When I moved four years ago, I didn't have any friends locally. I found other musicians to play with. What started as a casual jam eventually lead to playing gigs in bars as a group of friends. Music might be something worth looking into, you're more than welcome to come play at my house lol
I'm not sure if the aftermaths of four years of depression are still keeping people from seeing me as a great potential friend.
People don't have to know about your prior status unless you really, really want to tell them.
Follow up with the people you've met through hiking and maybe you have more in common. Just do what you enjoy doing (unless it's super solitary) and it would likely put you in the same space as potential friends. Depending on what city you are in, Meetup groups might even work.
You may want to consider 'meetings'....CODA, AA, Al Anon, NA, Nar-anon...if any of the subject matter applies to you. This is generally where 'strangers' come together to be open and honest about issues that they have
Would love for the original poster to comment again to let us know how you are doing.
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