I'm out and much happier! (Miami, Fort Lauderdale: sale, buying, to live in)

[yrralis1]

Originally Posted by Jmlacysr

That's exactly right and it seems that's less of a problem up here. The poor tend to congregate, live and work in the poor neighborhoods, not all over the city like Miami. Don't go to those hoods and you're less likey to see the seedy. That doesn't mean there is not some spill over but from my experience not anywhere close to the same degree as Miami. Poor lives with poor here, rich with rich.

You might find that there is a crime element in Boca . Just give it some time to learn the place more. I think the main difference is that the general atmosphere is much calmer , the beach is much nicer, and in Delray it does have a "home town" feel .

[Manolón]

Originally Posted by Jmlacysr

You are the very type of person I won't miss and so typical of the in your face self entitled Hispanic Miamian. You are the one that has to live with people just like you, now I don't.

It's inconceivably to me a case where your comments, your beliefs, your very existence on earth could have less to do with what I believe, feel and know.

Don't act like a subspecies, it's not adding value to my thread.

-----

JM

I lived in Boca, I know the area. Not for you, you are a Texas Ranger, you need confrontation, you are a frontier man. In no time you'll start blasting Jews driving Cadillacs, Newyorkers, Hanukka signs, gated areas for the very rich, boredom, very old people in their Arvida buses, punks at the beach....and Delray has seedy areas while Boca has no seedy areas.

I'll grant that Boca is a paradise compared to the place you were living, but not a place for a ranger.

[Jmlacysr]

Originally Posted by Manolón

-----

JM

I lived in Boca, I know the area. Not for you, you are a Texas Ranger, you need confrontation, you are a frontier man. In no time you'll start blasting Jews driving Cadillacs, Newyorkers, Hanukka signs, gated areas for the very rich, boredom, very old people in their Arvida buses, punks at the beach....and Delray has seedy areas while Boca has no seedy areas.

I'll grant that Boca is a paradise compared to the place you were living, but not a place for a ranger.

You're right more than wrong on here, but I think even you hope this time you're wrong. Where would a Ranger go anyway?

You're right again, better is a relative. If your hand is in the fire it feels better once it's out even if it's charred and blistered, but soon you'll be complaining it was burned at all.

It may be some of that I agree, and the culture shock probably accounts for the unrealistic bliss.

What I can say, is it's better for today and I'll take that over what I had yesterday.

[allcladrad]

Pear Martini,

"Wow, you are just a plain racist"

Why because he feels more comfortable living among people he feels more comfortable living amongst or because he admitted it?

Are the residents of Little Haiti racist? Of course not, but they are probably more comfortable than if they lived in Kansas.

[boxus]

Originally Posted by allcladrad

Pear Martini,

"Wow, you are just a plain racist"

Why because he feels more comfortable living among people he feels more comfortable living amongst or because he admitted it?

Are the residents of Little Haiti racist? Of course not, but they are probably more comfortable than if they lived in Kansas.

plus one on this. Nothing worng with want ing to live among people who are similiar in culture, ethnicity, and race. Many people do it and go without criticism, that is why we have numerous ethnic communities throughout the US.

I segregate myself by socioeconomic status, even though it would be cheaper for me to rent in Overtown, I choose Brickell because the building and people in it match my economic status, therefore I am comfortable around them. My money, my choice, and judging by things, I am not alone in this concept, not even close.

[Glasvegas]

Originally Posted by boxus

plus one on this. Nothing worng with want ing to live among people who are similiar in culture, ethnicity, and race. Many people do it and go without criticism, that is why we have numerous ethnic communities throughout the US.

I segregate myself by socioeconomic status, even though it would be cheaper for me to rent in Overtown, I choose Brickell because the building and people in it match my economic status, therefore I am comfortable around them. My money, my choice, and judging by things, I am not alone in this concept, not even close.

Nothing wrong with it at all, if that's your thing, but I believe the problems arise when people make sweeping generalizations about certain races. I encountered many Hispanic people in Miami who felt exactly the same way about Miami as JM did (still friends with 2 of them). I know the easy thing is to think that ALL Hispanics in Miami act a certain way, but that's a generalization and a generalization we should try to avoid making.

I was as guilty of this as JM was, but you live and learn. Miami has douchebags of all races and I cannot single one group out as being worse than the other.

Living among "your own" ends up being boring. One thing I appreciate about Boston is its true diversity. It doesn't feel as segregated and even Lynn, which has a large Puerto Rican population also has many Irish Americans, Italian Americans and African Americans living there. If I wanted to live among just white people in a white neighborhood where people stil wear fannypacks and smile at you for nothing, I'd move to Kansas.

[boxus]

People make generalizations all the time about people. I actually respect those who take action on their words, but I cannot stand those vocal few who rattle out how we should all hug each other, but then find out they are living in some area in which the population is mostly what the person is.

Socioeconomics is the reason for much segregation. People will tend to move on up as their income increases. For people who cannot acheive a higher income, they will migrate to areas that have a similar culture and race/ethnicity. I do not see anything wrong with it at all, it just seems people have a problem with it when a white person does it and openly states it.

[yrralis1]

Miami has douchebags of all races and I cannot single one group out as being worse than the other.

Well .......

This thread seems to have taken a turn and it's a shame because there are some nice things that Delray has to offer . The size, character, diversity, and way of life can be compared without pointing to streotypes , labeling, or name calling .

Perhaps the word "ghetto attitude" ought to be defined on a broad scale applicable to anyone regardless of race , ethnicity ,socioeconomics etc.

I would define "ghetto attitude" as a selfish , simplistic , need to affirm ones own ego . A person can even be wealthy and successful and still display this attitude (Ie celebritites) . It's all about "I , I , I, and me, me, me " attitude where somehow self esteem is an entitlement and actual respect isn't something a person earns . This attitude can be found anywhere .. but it is very visible in Miami .

Rather than speculate theories (as to why) it might be more accurate to list observable trends . Here's a few ...

1) A constant need for attention .
2) The person is never wrong . It is always someone else who has the problem ( the scapegoat) .
3) They can criticize BUT any criticism of them is not tolerated (and even may spark a narcissistic rage) .
4) Deception and lying -- They will misquote you right to your face and many times make more of an effort to be dishonest than if they just did the proper thing right from the start.
5) Lack of empathy -- The person is not capable of seeing how someone other than him/her self feels because his feelings are the only thing that matters .
6) Impulsive ( and perhaps even wreckless behavior ). Behavior and attitude is based on how one feels in that moment.
7) The "poor me" mantra ... This individual always plays the victim to the drama he creates and perpetuates . (The term "drama queen" sound familiar?)

They are adults but have the emotional maturity of a child on a verge of a tantrum . When upset .. they might even appear like an adult having a tantrum.

Now whether this behavior stems from insecurity , or lack of sophistication , or lack of emotional development .. or some other theoretical explanation .. it still has its impact on others . The degree or severity can vary but the impact can be seen in business , in personal relationships and friendship , in daily interractions , and even in taxpayer cost to provide counseling or extreme cases legal consequences .

[WINTERFRONT]

Originally Posted by yrralis1

1) A constant need for attention .
2) The person is never wrong . It is always someone else who has the problem ( the scapegoat) .
3) They can criticize BUT any criticism of them is not tolerated (and even may spark a narcissistic rage) .
4) Deception and lying -- They will misquote you right to your face and many times make more of an effort to be dishonest than if they just did the proper thing right from the start.
5) Lack of empathy -- The person is not capable of seeing how someone other than him/her self feels because his feelings are the only thing that matters .
6) Impulsive ( and perhaps even wreckless behavior ). Behavior and attitude is based on how one feels in that moment.
7) The "poor me" mantra ... This individual always plays the victim to the drama he creates and perpetuates . (The term "drama queen" sound familiar?)

+1

Extreme selfishness is the root of your examples.... but where does this selfishness come from?

[yrralis1]

Originally Posted by WINTERFRONT

+1

Extreme selfishness is the root of your examples.... but where does this selfishness come from?

I don't believe it's possible to define if/then causality to human behaviors. Social science tends to be more theoretical unlike math or science where facts are concrete .

What is easier to notice is what they avoid --

1) They dislike being exposed. They actually know the truth but they prefer fiction beuacse it even prevents them from exposing their own true self even to themselves .. much less others .

2) They are fearful of abandonment . Without the turmoil they face being alone .It's no surprise that they don't like their own company .

3) They detest dissent .... any disagreement is viewed as criticism . Any criticism is viewed as a personal insult .. even if it can help them.

When the truth is finally exposed (friends family, work, or in extreme cases a coutroom) beyond any reasonable doubt .. then they abandon and scoff all those who figured them out and simply move on to next sucker . They rarely have long term friendships.