Uncertainty about Returning Back Home

[TRex2]

Yes, the mid-Missouri and all of the smaller cities are pretty normal, as are the areas of Arkansas just to the South of them. Not sure about the Bootheel area, since I haven't spent too much time there. When you get away from them, it gets pretty obvious how messed up a lot of other places are. There isn't much trouble in the smaller cities across the Midwest, But St.Louis (as well as E.St.Louis)is starting to show inability to self govern.

That is one reason I recommended looking South of E.St.Louis, especially Carbondale, as they seem a lot more safe and sane. If things continue, we may have to send troops into St. Louis to straighten things out, and that would be bad for everyone.

[RisingAurvandil]

Originally Posted by TRex2

Yes, the mid-Missouri and all of the smaller cities are pretty normal, as are the areas of Arkansas just to the South of them. Not sure about the Bootheel area, since I haven't spent too much time there. When you get away from them, it gets pretty obvious how messed up a lot of other places are. There isn't much trouble in the smaller cities across the Midwest, But St.Louis (as well as E.St.Louis)is starting to show inability to self govern.

That is one reason I recommended looking South of E.St.Louis, especially Carbondale, as they seem a lot more safe and sane. If things continue, we may have to send troops into St. Louis to straighten things out, and that would be bad for everyone.

I'm not sure about that. From my perspective in the StL suburbs, both rural Missouri and inner-city Missouri are governed terribly. Both are poor. Both are in decline. Idleness is common in both. Both are drowning in welfare and drugs. Both are deficient in education, modern jobs, and access to the broader world.

But there are very fine people on both sides.

And some folks in glass houses.

[julesevar]

Originally Posted by SciFiNerd1

Hello everyone,

For quite some time, I have been thinking about moving back home to MO to be closer to family. I was born and raised deep in the Bootheel in a small town of Kennett. Although my family is very open-minded, it was still an awful place to grew up as a person who is LGBTIQA+.

I left as soon as I graduated from high school in 2001. I have attended colleges and lived in bigger cities across the country. I am currently in Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex in Texas. I always visit home once a year mostly for Thanksgiving.

The rest of my family are now in Cape Girardeau. My family has been getting smaller and smaller. As I grow older, I have realized that I want to be with my family while I can, especially to watch my little cousins to grow up.

I am married with a husband and we have no children. I am a professional licensed school counselor and my husband is a college professor teaching music.

I know MO economy has always been stagnant and state politics has leaned more conservative the last few years losing the status as a bellwether state.

Where in MO do you think would be best for an educated gay married couple to live? It does not have to be in Cape. A few hours away from Cape will be fine. We enjoy hiking, sailing on lakes, and be politically active. We enjoy going to gay bars once awhile.

Well I live in JC. We have no gay bars. We have had several drag shows here. Columbia has a bar that I am not sure is open now- Arches and Columns. The other gay bar Yin Yang closed. It seems that the whole 90's dance/gay bar culture is quietly dying. It is more drag queens and their followers? I am not sure if St Louis has a dance club where cool music is played. There is a bar near downtown that has a goth night which isn't just gay but I'm sure you'd be fine. There is a cool bar that shows videos and has karyoke on Manchester, but I forgot the name.

I would recommend you check out the gay resources to see if the area is "gay" enough. I would also look into jobs. I'm not sure most college professors (your hubby) can just jump and get another job? As far as school counselors I'm not sure. Have a good day!

[julesevar]

Oh the cool bar that I was talking about is called Crack Fox.....| The Crack Fox – 1114 Olive St. – St. Louis, MO. Bar for the misfit toys!

[SciFiNerd1]

Originally Posted by MOforthewin

Missouri has some of the best gun laws and self defense laws in the country. You can protect yourself. In St. Louis City or inner parts of St. Louis County like Crime Lawn I would carry an AR15 in the car if it were me.

When you said Crime Lawn, I assume you are referring to Pine Lawn. Unless I am wrong, most of the high crime rate is in North County. What is the boundary where North County starts where it gets really dangerous?

[SciFiNerd1]

Originally Posted by julesevar

Oh the cool bar that I was talking about is called Crack Fox.....| The Crack Fox – 1114 Olive St. – St. Louis, MO. Bar for the misfit toys!

Thank you for your suggestions. I will need to visit Columbia one day. By the way, I remember going to a gay bar in East St. Louis once with friends. Boxers N' Briefs was the name I think. I don't know if it is still there or not. It was pretty wild!

[julesevar]

Originally Posted by SciFiNerd1

Thank you for your suggestions. I will need to visit Columbia one day. By the way, I remember going to a gay bar in East St. Louis once with friends. Boxers N' Briefs was the name I think. I don't know if it is still there or not. It was pretty wild!

Yeah it has those male dancers that aren't ashamed to shake their money maker. I think it may still be there but haven't been there in years. I think it is in Centerville, IL.

[MOforthewin]

Originally Posted by SciFiNerd1

When you said Crime Lawn, I assume you are referring to Pine Lawn. Unless I am wrong, most of the high crime rate is in North County. What is the boundary where North County starts where it gets really dangerous?

It all depends. Crime Lawn is a running joke people call Pine Lawn even in law enforcement circles. Hell, their police dept. in Crime Lawn was corrupt too. Their chief was only allowed to be an officer in Pine Lawn due to some rape charge against him.

IMO hard to judge. North County in General I think now. Ever since the car plants left is when it started going way downhill. Look what happened to the Ferguson area. It wasn't always a bad area like it is now.

Wellston is another very bad area along with Pagedale and anything within the inner parts of Stl county that border the city in that area.

Those areas geographically not in traditional North County but for all intents it basically is north county.

be careful and stay out of those areas.

[STLCityMike]

I'm gay, and live in St. Louis City. I would look at Soulard. Very small town feel (for now) in the heart of the city. St. Louis definitely has some issues but don't judge a book by its stats. Visit the city and get off the highway into some amazing neighborhoods. The central corridor from Downtown to Clayton is certainly seeing most of the growth. I personally favor the 63104 zip code, and it offers quick access to 55 and isn't far from Cape. I live in the Gate District, have been here for 10 years and you would not believe the improvements made in that time (on LaFayette Ave especially). Let me know if there is anything I can help with.

Oh - the bar referenced above was likely Just John's. The Grove is home to most of the surviving LGBTQIA bars, but there are others in Soulard, South City and yes, Boxers is still open.

[MrIndependent]

Originally Posted by SciFiNerd1

Hello everyone,

For quite some time, I have been thinking about moving back home to MO to be closer to family. I was born and raised deep in the Bootheel in a small town of Kennett. Although my family is very open-minded, it was still an awful place to grew up as a person who is LGBTIQA+.

I left as soon as I graduated from high school in 2001. I have attended colleges and lived in bigger cities across the country. I am currently in Dallas/Fort Worth Metroplex in Texas. I always visit home once a year mostly for Thanksgiving.

The rest of my family are now in Cape Girardeau. My family has been getting smaller and smaller. As I grow older, I have realized that I want to be with my family while I can, especially to watch my little cousins to grow up.

I am married with a husband and we have no children. I am a professional licensed school counselor and my husband is a college professor teaching music.

I know MO economy has always been stagnant and state politics has leaned more conservative the last few years losing the status as a bellwether state.

Where in MO do you think would be best for an educated gay married couple to live? It does not have to be in Cape. A few hours away from Cape will be fine. We enjoy hiking, sailing on lakes, and be politically active. We enjoy going to gay bars once awhile.

St. Louis is the no brainer choice.
The real question is what part of STL.
I would recommend in between University City - Clayton as a first choice (STL County).
STL City has some real gems like Benton Park, Central West End, Soulard, The Grove, etc. The Grove is the center of gay social life in the STL Metro Area.

Regarding the politics. In my opinion, MO is still winnable for Democrats who are laser-focused on a true populist economic message. The challenge is that in present-day America, politics is now equally about social issues/culture war topics, not just economics. MO will never ever move far left on those issues, and will therefore remain solid red for a very long time.

It's not like MO is receiving massive influxes of transplants coming from other states, or immigrants from abroad. The economic attractions are minimal, subsequently, the population growth has been lackluster.