NJ to NC, then back to NJ? (Clayton: to rent, car insurance)

[spidron]

Anybody here who relocated to the NC RTP area then moved back to NJ?
Why?

[Yorkiegirl16]

Originally Posted by spidron

Anybody here who relocated to the NC RTP area then moved back to NJ?
Why?

This is my first post, but I have to respond because this hits close to home (no pun intended). I've been living in Concord NC for four months and its beautiful. I lived in Central NJ for 20 years and like many others I got sick of the high prices, the crowding, etc. As much as I love Concord -and its even more beautiful than I imagined, its just not what I'm accustomed to. Granted, I haven't given it a whole lot of time and I might be going through another bout of the "homesick blues", but how many bouts do me and my husband need to go through before you realize you're not where you want to be? I would suggest to anyone looking to move from NJ to NC to not just look at the home prices (which are climbing, but still nowhere near NJ), the car insurance and the climate. Look at other things that might not seem as important to you now but will be once you realize you're really 600 miles away from them. Those of you who are leaving family, friends, routines and the comforts of certain places or even a quick ride to the city, consider that as well. One more footnote- don't come down without employment. Promises of employment are not the same as a paycheck. Think long and hard and choose wisely. NC is beautiful, but my husband and I are already having serious discussions about moving back to NJ.

I'm off my soapbox now

[cyntmac]

Originally Posted by Yorkiegirl16

This is my first post, but I have to respond because this hits close to home (no pun intended). I've been living in Concord NC for four months and its beautiful. I lived in Central NJ for 20 years and like many others I got sick of the high prices, the crowding, etc. As much as I love Concord -and its even more beautiful than I imagined, its just not what I'm accustomed to. Granted, I haven't given it a whole lot of time and I might be going through another bout of the "homesick blues", but how many bouts do me and my husband need to go through before you realize you're not where you want to be? I would suggest to anyone looking to move from NJ to NC to not just look at the home prices (which are climbing, but still nowhere near NJ), the car insurance and the climate. Look at other things that might not seem as important to you now but will be once you realize you're really 600 miles away from them. Those of you who are leaving family, friends, routines and the comforts of certain places or even a quick ride to the city, consider that as well. One more footnote- don't come down without employment. Promises of employment are not the same as a paycheck. Think long and hard and choose wisely. NC is beautiful, but my husband and I are already having serious discussions about moving back to NJ.

I'm off my soapbox now

Funny, I have seen this identical post on the NY forum just with NY subbed for NJ. The wording of the response was very similar as well.

[saganista]

Originally Posted by cyntmac

Funny, I have seen this identical post on the NY forum just with NY subbed for NJ. The wording of the response was very similar as well.

That could be just because the experience is a common one. I have no idea in this case, but I am reminded of a project I did a few years ago to analyze some survey data on the experiences of federal government retirees in their first five years of retirement, and one of the things that came out of that was that half of those who had moved at least 500 miles from their former homes after retiring had moved at least half-way back within the following three years. It's all a part of the grass-is-greener syndrome. People simply have a tendency to underestimate the value of things that they consider commonplace and some that they don't even really consider at all. When those things suddenly go missing, things just don't feel right. Now, the people in that survey were all older. They'd had a long time to get used to one particular way of life and knew they had a limited number of years to adapt to a new one. But the lesson still stands, I think, and the lesson is that little things mean a lot...as in a lot more than we sometimes think they do. Something to be mindful of, at least...

[nycgooner]

You could say I am in that position as well. I followed my then-girlfriend (and now wife) to NC because she was going to vet school at NCSU. However, after our first child, I started to get very homesick for the NYC area. Then, it was difficult to see both sets of Gramps, since we either have to fly up or drive 12+ hours to see them. In a couple of weeks, I will be moving back up to NJ for a new job. My wife and child will follow afterwards.

For me, I just couldn't adjust to the lifestyle down here. I have run into too many people who think I will go to hell due to my political and spiritual beliefs. In addition, I can not deal with the racial/ethnic issues that exist down here. I never had problems with others, considering that I am multi-racial, but down here, it is a different story. It is sad, if you ask me, but I guess it is just life down here.

[spidron]

Things that worry me about moving.

- will RTP become an NJ (say in 5-10 yrs) because of all this growth that's happening down there, growth as in influx of folks like me from the tri-state area? Will the infrastructure and the ongoing improvements to it be able to sustain it?
- I always feel the need for an economy of major cities like NYC and Philly. I've yet to read about Charlotte, Raleigh, etc... though.
- I'm still reading and researching on this but it seems a lot of people who bought houses are investors in wait and see mode.
- I've accepted the fact that I will be getting a paycut. How much of a paycut? Maybe I'm just clouded by this dream of having this nice big home in a nice neighborhood, On a different salary scale like here in the NJ-NY area, it's different!

We'll be coming down in a month or two to get an initial feel.Then 1 or 2 more trips to get more of a feeling of the place. Then have a decision by Sept 07. I'm such a geek I have 3 versions of my plan in MS Project. :-)

[NewHomeHappy]

Originally Posted by Yorkiegirl16

This is my first post, but I have to respond because this hits close to home (no pun intended). I've been living in Concord NC for four months and its beautiful. I lived in Central NJ for 20 years and like many others I got sick of the high prices, the crowding, etc. As much as I love Concord -and its even more beautiful than I imagined, its just not what I'm accustomed to. Granted, I haven't given it a whole lot of time and I might be going through another bout of the "homesick blues", but how many bouts do me and my husband need to go through before you realize you're not where you want to be? I would suggest to anyone looking to move from NJ to NC to not just look at the home prices (which are climbing, but still nowhere near NJ), the car insurance and the climate. Look at other things that might not seem as important to you now but will be once you realize you're really 600 miles away from them. Those of you who are leaving family, friends, routines and the comforts of certain places or even a quick ride to the city, consider that as well. One more footnote- don't come down without employment. Promises of employment are not the same as a paycheck. Think long and hard and choose wisely. NC is beautiful, but my husband and I are already having serious discussions about moving back to NJ.

I'm off my soapbox now

Hi Yorkie!!
Just wanted to say thanks you for a Good Post. Not only because I agree with everything you said, but because you were HONEST & UPFRONT. No Shangri-la Bullcrap about NC + you did not badmouth NJ (too much

Let us know if there's any information or help you need if you do decide to move back to NJ. There are many helpful & resourceful people on this forum. And the NJ Forum is NOT filled with "rude whinners" (as someone described us) but in fact, they are friendly & upfront bunch of folks.

It's refreshing to read a post like yours. So Thanks & I hope to read more from you
**(I gave you Positive Rep Points for this post) Hint hint folks- let's all throw a bone !
Have a great day.

[North_Raleigh_Guy]

I agree, this is a very good post that asks a legitimate question. As my name implies, I live in Raleigh, NC but I was born and raised in Monmouth County, NJ. I love NJ and all my family is up there, so no bashing of NJ here!

I didn't move to Raleigh for any particular reason...just ended up here after living and working in a few other places out of college. I think you are going about your possible move in a smart way. The only person's opinion about NC that really counts is your own, so it is a great idea to make a trip or two down here to check out the area to see if it is the right fit for you. If you do decide to make the move, I have noticed many folks choose to rent a house for the first year before buying so they can get a better feel for what area they want to live in.

If you do move to the Triangle Area, the only thing I would suggest to you is that you consider living close to your future job in RTP. That would include areas like North Raleigh, Cary, Durham, Morrisville, and maybe Apex. In my experience the people who move from places like NY/NJ to live in more rural places like Clayton, Fuquay Varina and Holly Springs are the ones who experience "Culture shock" the most often. Although those are nice places to live, they are much more rural than the areas closer to the more urban centers of both Raleigh and Durham.

Good luck with your decision!

[Carat98]

Originally Posted by Yorkiegirl16

This is my first post, but I have to respond because this hits close to home (no pun intended). I've been living in Concord NC for four months and its beautiful. I lived in Central NJ for 20 years and like many others I got sick of the high prices, the crowding, etc. As much as I love Concord -and its even more beautiful than I imagined, its just not what I'm accustomed to. Granted, I haven't given it a whole lot of time and I might be going through another bout of the "homesick blues", but how many bouts do me and my husband need to go through before you realize you're not where you want to be? I would suggest to anyone looking to move from NJ to NC to not just look at the home prices (which are climbing, but still nowhere near NJ), the car insurance and the climate. Look at other things that might not seem as important to you now but will be once you realize you're really 600 miles away from them. Those of you who are leaving family, friends, routines and the comforts of certain places or even a quick ride to the city, consider that as well. One more footnote- don't come down without employment. Promises of employment are not the same as a paycheck. Think long and hard and choose wisely. NC is beautiful, but my husband and I are already having serious discussions about moving back to NJ.

I'm off my soapbox now

I moved to GA over 2 years ago and am contemplating moving back to NJ for much of the reasons you give. I was homesick also after just 4 months, but it helped to have a job. I got one after moving down here. Circumstances have changed, however, and I am not currently employed. So, I'm thinking that perhaps it may be a good time to move back home to NJ ............decisions.....decisions....and the longer I wait, the harder it may become to make my move......complacency.....Good luck with your decision.

[NJcanuck]

he he, this sounds so familiar. I moved away from NJ 9 years ago, and am now contemplating coming back. Not sure if I can afford it now, though. And reading some things on this forum (like the worst town in NJ thread) is starting to freak me out