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I try to make efforts to fit in with the crowd but whenever I say something, they don't care about what I have to say. I don't talk about myself because people don't find me interesteing
At my job I just hate being around the other girls. They start giving compliments and i never get one. Especially the lighter toned women, they always get a compliment. I moved and work around another group when they started giving each other compliments. I didn't get one at all. I feel ugly and inadequate. I dont know whats wrong with me. I try to dress nice and stuff but I am just a black girl who is dark. There is nothing exotic about me, I don't have light eyes, or straight hair to get compliments w/. Many of the guys are more friendly with the lighter toned women. I am so depressed, my life is so meaningless. Sometimes I just want to end my life
i think black skinned girl are the most beautiful creature in this world...........i have brown skin my self ...... but i have alway love black skin............ don't speak like that ...... i just met you and i think your great ....... sometimes people miss the gem right in front of them........ i hope in all honesty that was your co workers ........ cause you a gem to me..... ( a kiss from me to you)
I think that you have to give a damn about yourself.
My mother and sister are darker skinned and guys flock to them. Me....not so much and I'm not close to their skin tone at all. It's all about attitude and if you're giving off negative vibes (like I do sometimes), people are not going to approach you. It's that simple and another thing is this- never gauge your self worth by what another person says because they can take it back as quick as they can give it.
How do you know what vibes you are giving off? No one can determine that for themselves. If I knew the type of vibes I was sending and could fix it I certainly would. However, my problem is not just about guys but also just about connecting and networking with my peers. When I open myself up to people, they don't care about what I have to say. They cut me off, or change the subject. Or don't hear me at all. It could be the tone of my voice because I can be softspoken. I can't help that. I connect with very few people and its really distressing. I just think I need something like a light complexion or light eyes to keep people's interest.
And I am always meeting people who like me for no reason when I have done nothing to warrant it. I can be minding my own business and there is someone who has never spoken two words to me nor knows me from a can of paint that doesn't like me and they go out of their way to make sure I know it
How do you know what vibes you are giving off? No one can determine that for themselves. If I knew the type of vibes I was sending and could fix it I certainly would. However, my problem is not just about guys but also just about connecting and networking with my peers. When I open myself up to people, they don't care about what I have to say. They cut me off, or change the subject. Or don't hear me at all. It could be the tone of my voice because I can be softspoken. I can't help that. I connect with very few people and its really distressing. I just think I need something like a light complexion or light eyes to keep people's interest.
And I am always meeting people who like me for no reason when I have done nothing to warrant it. I can be minding my own business and there is someone who has never spoken two words to me nor knows me from a can of paint that doesn't like me and they go out of their way to make sure I know it
same thing here ... am thinkin .........sister??? is that u?
How do you know what vibes you are giving off? No one can determine that for themselves. If I knew the type of vibes I was sending and could fix it I certainly would. However, my problem is not just about guys but also just about connecting and networking with my peers. When I open myself up to people, they don't care about what I have to say. They cut me off, or change the subject. Or don't hear me at all. It could be the tone of my voice because I can be softspoken. I can't help that. I connect with very few people and its really distressing. I just think I need something like a light complexion or light eyes to keep people's interest.
And I am always meeting people who like me for no reason when I have done nothing to warrant it. I can be minding my own business and there is someone who has never spoken two words to me nor knows me from a can of paint that doesn't like me and they go out of their way to make sure I know it
When you think negatively about yourself you give off bad vibes. When you're unhappy with yourself, people can pick up on that energy. Is their something about yourself that you like?
Know that you are a beautiful, wonderful and unique creation of God.
Don't let others bring you down. Raise your head high with self confidence. Take pride in you.
Life is so beautiful, and just because it seems so sad to you right now, this will change...
Black women can be so beautiful and have so much to offer.
You just need to widen your circle - or meet new people.
Please don't be so depressed or down hearten, or do something drastic.
I try to make efforts to fit in with the crowd but whenever I say something, they don't care about what I have to say. I don't talk about myself because people don't find me interesteing
At my job I just hate being around the other girls. They start giving compliments and i never get one. Especially the lighter toned women, they always get a compliment. I moved and work around another group when they started giving each other compliments. I didn't get one at all.
Did you try giving compliments? Sometimes you have to give a little before you can get a little.
Quote:
I feel ugly and inadequate. I dont know whats wrong with me. I try to dress nice and stuff but I am just a black girl who is dark. There is nothing exotic about me, I don't have light eyes, or straight hair to get compliments w/.
Since when are light eyes and straight hair "exotic"? Your appearance sounds much more exotic to me.
Quote:
I am so depressed, my life is so meaningless. Sometimes I just want to end my life
Then I urge you to see a professional therapist. This is far more serious than what some random people on a forum can help you with. A therapist will not only help you with your suicidal feelings but may also be able to help you overcome your social barriers.
Did you try giving compliments? Sometimes you have to give a little before you can get a little.
Since when are light eyes and straight hair "exotic"? Your appearance sounds much more exotic to me.
Then I urge you to see a professional therapist. This is far more serious than what some random people on a forum can help you with. A therapist will not only help you with your suicidal feelings but may also be able to help you overcome your social barriers.
I like this answer very much. You sound very depressed, and you are worthy of working your way out of this. You are worth way more than you give yourself credit for. I sure wish I knew you in person.
OP, please seek professional help immediately. There are suicide hotlines open 24 hrs. per day - they would be more equipped to deal with your feelings of isolation.
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