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Old 11-15-2012, 09:28 AM
 
Location: Denver, CO
1,421 posts, read 1,193,558 times
Reputation: 1751

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I booked a flight from Chicago to Istanbul for 5 days (with layovers in Munich and Zurich)

Apparently my parents got in a fight and now my Dad (who wasn't interested when I offered before) is claiming he wants to go --- expressing concern for me traveling by myself.

I'm 23 years old, a college grad, living at home (working full time, and saving for a down payment on a house).


I was planning on couchsurfing on this trip -- I love meeting people and have had a great experience when I was in Brussels and Amsterdam in the spring with it. My dad wants to stay in a hotel and I feel like it's going to be a drag --- don't get me wrong, it would be "cool" to have my dad with me for part of the trip, but I'm going to be running around and whatnot, and I'm not quite sure he's up for all of it.

I dont know how to nicely say that I'll be fine and I want to travel alone without hurting his feelings.

Maybe I'm being harsh and it won't be as bad as I thought... I don't know?
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Old 11-15-2012, 11:23 AM
 
7,099 posts, read 24,411,509 times
Reputation: 7301
At some point, Dad is going to have to admit that you are an adult. As long as you live at home....no matter what the reason....he will continue to see you as a young child in need of a guiding hand.

Therefore, you either let him come or you tell him that you want to travel alone. Your choice. OR...and this is what I would do......you can put the money that you are going to spend on the trip on your new home. That would be the grownup thing to do..

As long as you travel, the longer it will take to save up that money for a home. Sounds like you like living with your parents. I'll bet your mom does most of the housework and cooking.
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Old 11-15-2012, 12:37 PM
 
Location: Denver, CO
1,421 posts, read 1,193,558 times
Reputation: 1751
Quote:
Originally Posted by Padgett2 View Post
At some point, Dad is going to have to admit that you are an adult. As long as you live at home....no matter what the reason....he will continue to see you as a young child in need of a guiding hand.

Therefore, you either let him come or you tell him that you want to travel alone. Your choice. OR...and this is what I would do......you can put the money that you are going to spend on the trip on your new home. That would be the grownup thing to do..

As long as you travel, the longer it will take to save up that money for a home. Sounds like you like living with your parents. I'll bet your mom does most of the housework and cooking.
I have $30,000 saved already. I'm not going to miss the $700 I spend on this trip, but I would miss out on a great opportunity to travel... plus I have the week off from work.
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Old 11-15-2012, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Back at home in western Washington!
1,500 posts, read 3,918,588 times
Reputation: 3226
Are you couchsurfing on couches of people you already know?

I got the impression that you are planning on sleeping on strangers couches that you meet over there...I can't begin to tell you how bad I think that idea is.
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Old 11-15-2012, 02:58 PM
 
Location: Denver, CO
1,421 posts, read 1,193,558 times
Reputation: 1751
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sabinerose View Post
Are you couchsurfing on couches of people you already know?

I got the impression that you are planning on sleeping on strangers couches that you meet over there...I can't begin to tell you how bad I think that idea is.
Couchsurfing – The world’s largest travel community

Everyone I'm staying with has references. I've hosted a few people myself as well
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Old 11-15-2012, 03:04 PM
 
28,906 posts, read 46,519,383 times
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You know what? I didn't get along with my dad, but I'd give just about anything nowadays to spend five days with him exploring a really cool city.
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Old 11-15-2012, 05:12 PM
 
Location: Boston, MA
8,563 posts, read 7,546,049 times
Reputation: 7424
I don't think you're being unreasonable. I'm your age, and at 23, we really are capable of being by ourselves. You've managed to save a good amount of money, so you're quite responsible. I think it's really best to be up front with him. I know having my parents (or anyone) with me while traveling would just really annoy me.
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Old 11-15-2012, 05:41 PM
 
Location: Podunk, Cackalacky
300 posts, read 568,028 times
Reputation: 345
Quote:
Originally Posted by caverunner17 View Post
I booked a flight from Chicago to Istanbul for 5 days (with layovers in Munich and Zurich)

Apparently my parents got in a fight and now my Dad (who wasn't interested when I offered before) is claiming he wants to go --- expressing concern for me traveling by myself.

I'm 23 years old, a college grad, living at home (working full time, and saving for a down payment on a house).


I was planning on couchsurfing on this trip -- I love meeting people and have had a great experience when I was in Brussels and Amsterdam in the spring with it. My dad wants to stay in a hotel and I feel like it's going to be a drag --- don't get me wrong, it would be "cool" to have my dad with me for part of the trip, but I'm going to be running around and whatnot, and I'm not quite sure he's up for all of it.

I dont know how to nicely say that I'll be fine and I want to travel alone without hurting his feelings.

Maybe I'm being harsh and it won't be as bad as I thought... I don't know?
Couchsurfing is awesome. I've done it in many countries, never had a bad experience. How about this: instead of saying "Dad, I don't want you to come with me," say "Dad, I know you're worried about my safety, and I appreciate that. But I don't want to be dependent on you forever. I think it will be good for me to do this on my own."
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Old 11-15-2012, 06:18 PM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
31,064 posts, read 19,641,828 times
Reputation: 44867
Well, you asked him to go before and he declined. I'm betting you turned it into a "couch surfing" after you found out you were going alone. You can either change the type of trip and include him - maybe he can pay for the hotels then. Or, go with your current plan, and do something different with your dad later.

Good luck.
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Old 11-15-2012, 07:45 PM
 
7,099 posts, read 24,411,509 times
Reputation: 7301
I have a feeling that the couchsurfing part of your trip worries him. It would worry me if one of mine had planned to do that.

Look at it from his point of view. Perhaps he would be glad to foot the bill, to get you more safety, especially in that part of the world. The fighting will probably get worse.
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