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I have friends who are late all the time. Now I don't mind if they are 10 or 15 minutes late, but I have friends who are consistently 45 min to an hour late seemingly without concern.
I've chewed them out before but it doesn't change anything so it seems kind of pointless. And disowning them as friends is extreme I think.
Fifteen minutes or a phone call with a very good excuse. This is a power issue (you are less important than they are), and you should not put up with it.
If they are invited to dinner, eat without them. If they are meeting you somewhere, be gone when they get there.
If I had a friend that was consistently 45 minutes late they would not be a friend.
It sucks. But some of these friends I've known for many years. You start dumping friends for this and that reasona nd you really shorten your friend network.
We knew a couple who were our best friends for many years, and the wife was always 45 min. late, at least. (We would tell her the time to be ready was 1 hr. earlier than we planned.) The funny thing was that all those years they had little money, but then they inherited a sizable estate. From that day forth, she was on time. Maybe the lateness had been a power struggle and suddenly, with much more cash, she felt powerful and didn't need to control anyone.
I've never had problems with friends being late (except for bad weather or something like that), but i would be really upset if they were always that late.
The advice I always hear is warn your friends about deadlines and then follow those deadlines/time table.
"Jenny, let's meet to leave for the play at 7:15 PM. We have to leave by 7:30 PM as the curtain goes up at 8:00 PM." If she isn't there by 7:15 leave.
"Mary, we need to order brunch by 11:00 AM as I need to go into work at 12:30". If she isn't there, then order and you may be done eating (or gone) when she arrives.
"I'll drive everyone to the cabin Friday afternoon but we need to get on the road by 3:00 PM to miss rush hour traffic." And then leave if they aren't there by 3:00.
If your friends miss a few things that are important to them maybe they will start being on time.
If they are always 45 minutes late for work, the start of a funeral, lunch with their boss, their own wedding, etc, I wouldn't be too confident about them being on time for you either. But, I suspect that they are on time for events and people that they value.
Fifteen minutes or a phone call with a very good excuse. Thisis a power issue (you are less important than they are), and you should not put up with it.
If they are invited to dinner, eat without them. If they are meeting you somewhere, be gone when they get there.
Not that I meet people that often, not even every month, HOWEVER, when I do, I'm always there several minutes early & therefore, always waiting on them. My rule is, 15 min late is OK. After 30 min, I call/text them to kind of see what's going on.
If the same friend is always 30 min late 3-5 times in a row, I'd start to get fed up.
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