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Keeping friends is harder than making friends for sure.
You can always easily make friends just by introducing yourself to others and saying hi. That is the icebreaker and friendships might blossom from there.
But keeping friends is a different matter altogether. Whether you can keep current friends depends on various factors like fate, frequency, interests, whether you both are in the same environment and personality. There are other factors of course.
Despite my best efforts I haven't made a new real life friend in 22 years. I've only lost 2 during that time --- one needed to end, another friend died.
Keeping friends is harder than making friends for sure.
You can always easily make friends just by introducing yourself to others and saying hi. That is the icebreaker and friendships might blossom from there.
But keeping friends is a different matter altogether. Whether you can keep current friends depends on various factors like fate, frequency, interests, whether you both are in the same environment and personality. There are other factors of course.
I like this, I very easily make friends.. After a time though as with most people (sadly)
Personalities collide, world views...
I find it easy to just say... Hey it's my choice not to talk religion or politics..
Two subjects that have started every war and conflict since the beginning of time..
If two people can get together and just.... they might just love each other..
It's not all that hard to love the person sitting next to you, stranger or not..
I feel we as Human beings Just forgot that, we have that quality..
Separates Man from Beast..
My life joy is from meeting people, even from the internet.
Most are some of the best people I want to know..
Better even then some people I have known for years...
Last edited by Caligula1; 04-09-2013 at 04:57 AM..
When your young you easily make friends through school, sports, church, etc. When you grow some you may have changes in your life and may not keep some of those friends but many of those people will still be your friends growing up, especially if you stay living in the same area.
When your older it is definitely harder to make friends, people are "settled" with the group they are in and don't actively look for new friends. You may be introduced to new friends through your current friends.
But if you are actively looking for new friendships and if you do make some new friends, it still may be a superficial friendship, built on the similar interest and not a "deep" friendship where they would be there in tough times. And to keep those friends may be harder because there may not be enough levels of similar interests or the "history" between you to keep it an active relationship.
I categorize levels of friendships;
The family friendships with your relatives/cousins, you grew up together and just stay close to throughout adult life.
The school/sport/interests friends that you grew up with. Usually some of the strongest bond friendships that you do alot of socializing with and your kids are growing up around their kids.
There are work colleagues that you may have the odd dinner out.
The similar interest friends that you may meet through a sport club or taking a craft class, etc that you only share that interest with.
The "bestie" friend or friends that you feel comfortable enough sharing your personal problems, these tend to maybe end up being your spouse and best man/bridesmaid.
The acquaintances, these are not your friends but you do know their name and some basic personal information and will talk about how the weather is but nothing much deeper then that. If these people leave your life you won't miss them and will be quickly forgotten.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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Making 'friends' is easy, or at least, not unrealistic. Keeping friends, well, that depends on the friends you make. You could say making real friends that will last is hard.
Seriously ,
Most people are acquaintences ,casual contacts that have busy lives and a world of their own to deal with from day to day .
I meet people every day , some I see more often and of course when working there are those that we find some thing in common that is the prime source of conversation.
A friend is some one that I depend on and whom can depend on me as well, out side work .
Just because I hang out with some one does not equate to friendship necessarily.
What you will do for a friend are thing you would not do for any one else .
Friend ships too,can be open ended as it were , for instance .
There are women I know that are married , and we can talk and share feelings and ideas freely , however because they are married there are certian things things we don't do or address because it is inappropreate .
Some decisions or opinions they need to have their husband's insight an not mine .
We share E mail from time to time but there is no intiment information exchanged .
Most of the men I associate are from church but there are several out side church I see regularly .
Some good friends do not use the inner net much any more being very busy scratching for a living and I miss them ,but at least I can pray for them , and that is all I would expect any of them to do for me.
On the subject of friends, the very best friend I have is God .
And while to you or others is sounds far fetched , you haven't traveled in my shoes . But God does. and I know Him.
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