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First of all I do not think you trying to find friends that way is odd. A lot of people do that. You should look into some local groups that share your passions such as recycling, or maybe vegetarianism, in order to meet people who share your beliefs. But please do not mistake these beliefs as morals. They are not. They are basically a life-style choice. And those who do not do them as well are not bad, immoral or stupid. Which brings me to my next point; christian's are not stupid either.
Just because someone believes different than you does not make them dumb or uneducated. If a christian called you stupid or a heathen for your athiest beliefs you would be the first one saying how "unchristian" they were. It is not a nice thing to do and from someone speaking from their moral pulpit it is very inappropriate.
Also, I am in the environmental sciences AND a christian--it is possible to wear both hats. And I can tell you, WITHOUT A DOUBT, that science cannot, will not or EVER be able to tell us where we come from. Period. It is a THEORY with contradictory evidence and no way to prove it and THAT is a scientific fact. And new research has even shown, and this is in the last few months actually though I can't remember where it was published but it was even on the news, that there were major errors made in Darwin's calculations. Anyway, this is not a theological debate as what I believe is up to me and what you believe is up to you--and that is the point. I would NEVER dream of calling you stupid or ignorant because of your beliefs and I would expect the same in return.
Back to the idea of picking those that are just like us, I do not think that is normal. I know you have every right to be discerning, and we SHOULD be, but to discount entire groups of people is a bit off. Who knows what wonderful friendships you might be missing out on What these people who are different than you could teach you? And I am not saying this about morals, basic human morals to be kind, not steal, be honest, etc.. those should never be discounted. And there are things that are just deal breakers, for me it is drug use of any kind. But open up a little and let people into your life. I have friends who are athiests and they are some of the kindest most generous people that I know. We obviously do not agree but we do not put other people down for their beliefs either. We pray before dinner when they come over and they quietly and RESPECTFULLY remain silent until it is over. When we go to their house obviously they do not nor would we dream of praying aloud there. We just quickly and silently send our thanks heavenward and leave it at that. You learn to co-habitat as it were. You do not necessarily have to agree with someone on their BELIEFS to enjoy their company.
And to Christians out there I believe you do not have to shut yourself away from everyone who is different from you. I think if you are strong in your beliefs than their ideas will not deter you from yours. Just be kind, loving and respectful. If we live completely separately from the world how are we to be an example as Christ wished us to be and possibly do some good or make a difference in others live. Just MHO.
for example, i want friends who are like me when it comes to personal decisions. those who are faithful to only one partner (monogamous), people compassionate enough to other creatures to be vegetarian, people who care about the world enough to recycle and compost.
for example, before i've had friends who were simply cruel to others, who were thieves to people i didn't know, who cheated on their partners, who tried to seduce another person in a relationship. most of these people didn't care one bit for animals or the earth, and this annoyed me a bit, and i annoyed them when i tried convincing them to change their ways (recycling). who practically worshipped stupid celebrities and rich people on TV (like that show with Paris Hilton) by giving them so much attention.
it seems unnatural to specifically seek people who think like me out. and the only way i can seem to do that, making sure we're on the same page is by posting an ad describing my attributes and those i seek in a potential friend, then arranging to meet whoever replies. i am very picky about the people i choose to have personal relationships with, and prefer to go through life alone rather than spend my extracurricular time with those with poor taste and unrefined choice-making.
i guess this makes me sound like a snob. either that or antisocial, or both.
but my question is...how odd is it?
No. It's normal. Better than trying to change people.
How odd is it? Personally, I find it VERY odd.....your intolerance of those who believe differently than you do. Although it's wise to associate mainly with those whose moral compass is pointed in the direction of "good", you are isolating yourself from others with your intolerance. In your eyes, there is only black and white. Your way or the highway.
If you don't make some changes, I predict that you're going to be a very lonely, miserable human being. Don't look for a mirror image of yourself, when choosing friends. Look for those who accept you for who you are, and people who don't try to cram their beliefs and habits down your throat.....THEN, learn to be the same kind of person you're looking for in a friend. Of course, you'll want your close friends to have "similar" interests, but they shouldn't have to be EXACTLY like you. Again, you are the one with the problem and yeah...it's odd, but it's more than that.....it's sad.
Who is being intolerant and who is judging who here?
I'd say no, it's not unusual to want friends of a certain moral fiber. But the way you define it is very specific to the point that you just seem very rigid and controlling. Relax. The idea that a person is either a monogamous vegetarian composter or a morally depraved sociopath seems a bit extreme.
I'm pretty hardcore about my personal code, but I have a lot of people in my life I care about to varying degrees, ranging from a recently imprisoned felon at one extreme to elderly lifelong churchgoers at the other. They'll all tell you they enjoy my company, even though I'm very different from a lot of them. But part of the reason I value them so much is that they provide me a different perspective on how I live my life and the richness they bring into it. That convicted felon? He's the boyfriend of a close friend, and he's great at telling me I need to relax and not worry - and he's right. Compared to a lot of his worries, my stuff is small potatoes. And those elderly churchgoers (I'm a mid-30s left-wing atheist)? They ground me in the history of my family and remind me about the things that are really important, like community and kindness.
Learn to value people for the depth they add to your life and the insights they provide you rather than merely because they reflect or embody your very specific personal beliefs. You're missing out otherwise.
I'd say no, it's not unusual to want friends of a certain moral fiber. But the way you define it is very specific to the point that you just seem very rigid and controlling. Relax. The idea that a person is either a monogamous vegetarian composter or a morally depraved sociopath seems a bit extreme.
I'm pretty hardcore about my personal code, but I have a lot of people in my life I care about to varying degrees, ranging from a recently imprisoned felon at one extreme to elderly lifelong churchgoers at the other. They'll all tell you they enjoy my company, even though I'm very different from a lot of them. But part of the reason I value them so much is that they provide me a different perspective on how I live my life and the richness they bring into it. That convicted felon? He's the boyfriend of a close friend, and he's great at telling me I need to relax and not worry - and he's right. Compared to a lot of his worries, my stuff is small potatoes. And those elderly churchgoers (I'm a mid-30s left-wing atheist)? They ground me in the history of my family and remind me about the things that are really important, like community and kindness.
Learn to value people for the depth they add to your life and the insights they provide you rather than merely because they reflect or embody your very specific personal beliefs. You're missing out otherwise.
Yeah, you have a good point there. Just watch your back around that convicted felon...lol
Genuine thought? Yes. Tact? Well I don't insult anyone to their FACE, preferring to not associate with them at all. So yes, I am tactful. But inside I see huge flaws in the thoughts and behavior of most people.
Haha, you can't call me just as dumb as a religious person. My beliefs are based on what is scientifically PROVEN. Science, gotta love it!!
I certainly don't think the world is 4,000 years old and there was such thing as NOAH'S ARK. What an insane idea. You cannot possibly call me as dumb as someone who believes that really happened.
And Muslims going around thinking if they blow themselves they'll get 72 virgin lovers or whatever? Oh, boy. Violence in the name of religion, whatsoever, makes me hate religion itself.
And this is why I said you'll miss out on a lot of great people and things with small minded views as this ^^. I've dated a man who grew up in an Islamic household and he certainly did not believe nor was taught that if he blew himself up he'd earn his passage into Heaven with "72" virgins HAHA what a ridiculous little world you live in if you think that all Muslims think THAT
The truth is there are extremists Muslims, just like there are extremist Christians--ever heard of a little group called the KKK?????
And oh boy--you're right because it's "Science" haha and how many times has Scientific theories been able to be proven wrong? Because you can correct me if I'm wrong but last time I checked most Scientific theories presented in history have had to be revisited, corrected, or modified.
Well OP, one thing is for sure if you keep up with this judgmental nature, you wont have to worry about meeting any flawed characters...because you won't have anyone period.
And this is why I said you'll miss out on a lot of great people and things with small minded views as this ^^. I've dated a man who grew up in an Islamic household and he certainly did not believe nor was taught that if he blew himself up he'd earn his passage into Heaven with "72" virgins HAHA what a ridiculous little world you live in if you think that all Muslims think THAT
The truth is there are extremists Muslims, just like there are extremist Christians--ever heard of a little group called the KKK?????
And oh boy--you're right because it's "Science" haha and how many times has Scientific theories been able to be proven wrong? Because you can correct me if I'm wrong but last time I checked most Scientific theories presented in history have had to be revisited, corrected, or modified.
Well OP, one thing is for sure if you keep up with this judgmental nature, you wont have to worry about meeting any flawed characters...because you won't have anyone period.
Why yes, I judge based on level of stupidity. Most of the world is indeed pretty damn stupid, and I don't want anything to do with them.
Religion is based on silly stories and lies passed down through child brainwashing from generation to generation. By the way, science is not capitalized. And yes, I have heard of the KKK, you didn't need to put five question marks, chill out lady. I don't even need science to know that it is not possible to put three million species with two genders each on one little boat. It's truly sad if you're going to argue with me about the validity of Noah's ark.
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What these people who are different than you could teach you? And I am not saying this about morals, basic human morals to be kind, not steal, be honest, etc.. those should never be discounted. And there are things that are just deal breakers, for me it is drug use of any kind. But open up a little and let people into your life. I have friends who are athiests and they are some of the kindest most generous people that I know. We obviously do not agree but we do not put other people down for their beliefs either. We pray before dinner when they come over and they quietly and RESPECTFULLY remain silent until it is over. When we go to their house obviously they do not nor would we dream of praying aloud there. We just quickly and silently send our thanks heavenward and leave it at that. You learn to co-habitat as it were. You do not necessarily have to agree with someone on their BELIEFS to enjoy their company. 
And this is why I said you'll miss out on a lot of great people and things with small minded views as this ^^. I've dated a man who grew up in an Islamic household and he certainly did not believe nor was taught that if he blew himself up he'd earn his passage into Heaven with "72" virgins HAHA what a ridiculous little world you live in if you think that all Muslims think THAT
