Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,068,476 times
Reputation: 11862
Advertisements
It could be my social insecurity, but sometimes I used to feel say in a group setting, that I would always be 'left out', and that people preferred to talk to others in the group instead of me. Even when I tried to contribute something interesting or tried to initiate, it seemed like I was always making the effort. Or at a party when going out when a new group of strangers were being introduced, I just felt that people weren't interested in me, or seemed to ignore me.
Maybe this is just how most people who aren't outwardly popular or have 'magnetic personalities' feel, but I do wonder if my shy demeanour has something to do with this?
It could be my social insecurity, but sometimes I used to feel say in a group setting, that I would always be 'left out', and that people preferred to talk to others in the group instead of me. Even when I tried to contribute something interesting or tried to initiate, it seemed like I was always making the effort. Or at a party when going out when a new group of strangers were being introduced, I just felt that people weren't interested in me, or seemed to ignore me.
Maybe this is just how most people who aren't outwardly popular or have 'magnetic personalities' feel, but I do wonder if my shy demeanour has something to do with this?
Have you ever felt like this?
I feel like this all the time. I don't think it's your insecurity or imagination.
People are like that. They want to talk to potential partners, people who will help introduce them to potential partners or people who are interesting in their minds.
Just forget it, and try and move on to people who will pay attention to you. Try meetup groups.
This is almost he story of my life! I'm an only child, so I never had many friends...usually just one at a time & if I knew more, they never knew each other. I PREFER being 1-on-1 when hanging out with a pal. The very rare times I was in a 3+ person group, you'd better believe, I was left out. I guess since I was always on the quiet/shy side due to not having a lot of social experience with lots of people. I'm better now, but still not that talkative.
I'm in my 30s & just now getting to the point where I'm being more talkative. I just don't have much to say. Whereas other people talk about their kids or something, I'm still single without kids yet. I haven't travelled much, so there's not much I can say about that either. I guess I'm a rather dull person, but if anyone got to really know me, they'd see that I'm one of the sweetest & most genuine person they'll ever know...but no one gets to know me that well.
No matter where I go, everyone has their own close friends already, so they don't care about becoming friends with me.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,068,476 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forever Blue
This is almost he story of my life! I'm an only child, so I never had many friends...usually just one at a time & if I knew more, they never knew each other. I PREFER being 1-on-1 when hanging out with a pal. The very rare times I was in a 3+ person group, you'd better believe, I was left out. I guess since I was always on the quiet/shy side due to not having a lot of social experience with lots of people. I'm better now, but still not that talkative.
I'm in my 30s & just now getting to the point where I'm being more talkative. I just don't have much to say. Whereas other people talk about their kids or something, I'm still single without kids yet. I haven't travelled much, so there's not much I can say about that either. I guess I'm a rather dull person, but if anyone got to really know me, they'd see that I'm one of the sweetest & most genuine person they'll ever know...but no one gets to know me that well.
No matter where I go, everyone has their own close friends already, so they don't care about becoming friends with me.
I feel ya. It's like, you have so much to share, and you think of all the witty or deep conversations you could have, and then you realise how shallow most of your conversations have been, about nothing or the same old crap like your job, what you did on the weekend etc. It's like you can talk a lot but never really get to know somebody's soul. It's sad, really.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,068,476 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Forever Blue
Yeah, my mom's told me a few times before that I'm really funny & that it's too bad more people don't know how funny I really am.
In group situations the people who think they will funny will tend to dominate, while the others will keep quiet. If there are many jokers in the pack be prepared to compete and raise your voice if you have to.
This is almost he story of my life! I'm an only child, so I never had many friends...usually just one at a time & if I knew more, they never knew each other. .
I don't think being an only child determines how many friends you have. For example, I'm an only child and I have many friends.
However, my father has several siblings but he doesn't have many friends.
. I guess since I was always on the quiet/shy side due to not having a lot of social experience with lots of people. I'm better now, but still not that talkative.
.
You were never social or around a lot of people? Did you go to school or were you homeschooled?
I feel ya. It's like, you have so much to share, and you think of all the witty or deep conversations you could have, and then you realise how shallow most of your conversations have been, about nothing or the same old crap like your job, what you did on the weekend etc. It's like you can talk a lot but never really get to know somebody's soul. It's sad, really.
I'm the same! I have so much to tell but never do. I think it has a lot to do with surrounding yourself with the right people. I know this has been a main area I need to improve for a long time now, I have always surrounded myself with wrong people and never really felt comfortable to share my stories. It's always just shallow conversation. I do prefer one-one-one relationships though.
Maybe who ever it is that your around is just talking about something that does not interest you and they know that.
It can get like this with some of my friends I hang out with, everyone or a large portion of the group wil be engaged in a conversation and I wont have any part in it. I dont mind that because after all, we are still in the same place and the convo cant go on forever since there is something larger at hand in the moment, like a game of cornhole or poker or something.
If my friends are having a get together say...... a lot of them are all sports fans and can talk forever about individual stats on one athlete. Its not just, " Oh I think the giants will beat the packers" Its more like, "well this guy had 39 yards while the other guy had 53 for this many sacks and has this many turnovers with .867 percent chance of this and that" they are really dedicated to the pure mathematical stats of each game, and its not just football...its soccer, golf, nba, nhl, mlb, everything.
they know im not interested in any of it so naturally they leave me out. But when the conversation is about music and movies, im in that head first with strong opinions on all of it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
