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Hate to break it to you OP, but just because you're a parent doesn't automatically make you love your child. If that were true, why would parents abandon their children? Happens every single day. Why would parents beat their children if they loved them? Happens every day. Just because you share DNA doesn't you love someone.
And giving up a child does NOT mean that one doesn't love their child. They probably feel that someone else is better quipped to take care of the child. Having a child is not easy. Raising a child isn't easy either.
Don't judge until you are in those same shoes. Hope and pray you never are!
Well, I didn't tell anyone anything, as soon as she told me I stopped speaking to her. It wasn't my business to tell anyone. Also, she was a foster kid so she switched homes a lot back in the day. I'm pretty sure that by that time she was in the independent living program though so as far as I can recall she was living by herself as an adult. Her life was super messed up, she never really had a stable family life. That's why my mom never liked her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
This is your naivete showing. You are being SO judgmental about someone whose life you really know nothing about.
WHY DO YOU CARE? This is a very bad idea. What good would your meddling do at this point??? And why is it such a burr under your saddle all of a sudden?
Quote:
Originally Posted by castle.knights
I care because this girl was left at a DOORSTEP and was abandoned by her own mother, someone I knew and was actually friends with. I want to see if her life has turned out ok. I care about her. I want to know if she's adopted, if she's in the foster system, if she's still with the family who's doorstep she was uncaringly left on.
Funny - you didn't care enough 15 years ago to tell ANYONE! That's when you could have had some impact...now you're just being a silly little girl about it. Grow up...learn some empathy...and get on with your own life.
I haven't read every page of this thread but, here in Kentucky, and I think a few other states, she could take the baby to any hospital to leave it, and there's no questions asked.
I'm just curious, OP, do you know where this 15-year-old girl is? How would you even go about finding her, if not? I agree with the posters. It's none of your business.
Having a tough life and being in the foster system your whole life doesn't excuse leaving your child at a doorstep. I'm sorry but this isn't a lifetime movie, mothers can't just do that, regardless of their emotional instability and hardships. It's completely unethical and selfish. I may not have experienced this firsthand but my values tell me what she did was messed up. The fact she gave her baby to some other random family so they could love her the way she couldn't is also really messed up. She should love her child more than anything. I can't fathom not being loved by my mom. Also, the fact she herself was abandoned as a baby and put in foster care makes what she did even worse because she knew what it would be like growing up without biological parents.
I feel extremely tempted to talk to her daughter, she's nearly 15 now, she could tell me what her life's been like without a biological mom.
So you realized her plan which she told you down to a T was a criminal act and you did absolutely nothing. You didn't alert the police, or contact child services or try to discourage her and find help or even tell a single person? Well I guess it makes sense that you are feeling some guilt albeit belated.
I am very surprised that your former friend was not prosecuted when it was found out what she did. I'm also surprised it was not on the national news. Something like that would surly have been big news especially 15 years ago. imagine the child was adopted after that so I don't know how you think you would ever find this girl and even if you did its none of your business what her life is like. I would bet better than if she had not been as obviously your former friend was in no place to raise the child herself. If you wanted to help you would have done so when your friend was in a crisis.
I am very surprised that your former friend was not prosecuted when it was found out what she did. I'm also surprised it was not on the national news. Something like that would surly have been big news especially 15 years ago.
It was not on the news because it very likely did not happen.
I left my kid on the doorstep of the airport yesterday. He is 27, though, and he really needed to go home.
The reason I'm making jokes is because I started thinking about how implausible this story really is. I highly doubt that your friend just dumped her infant on a doorstep like she's the star of some Lifetime movie.
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