Your "I'm Alone on the Holidays" Thread (guilty, friendship, wife)
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I believe the reason OP started this post, is that, you are truly not alone when there are others in the same situation as you. It can be a comfort to know you are not alone in your aloneness.
My husband has job that often requires working holidays and is working on Thanksgiving and Christmas Day this year. I'm fine with it. I buy or prepare some kind of holiday treat to eat, hang out with the cats, play Christmas carols on the piano, do some winter-themed embroidery. This year I'm actually leaving the house on Christmas Day and meeting some people for Chinese food.
Holidays used to be SO stressful since the in-laws lived two hours away and we had to go to visit both families. Christmas as my parents' house was often volatile since my dad had a horrible and you never knew what would set him off. As the only female in either family, I had to bake cookies or prepare some other kind of food to bring to dinners, then help cook and clean up after both dinners. Exhausting. And there were scads of people to buy presents for. I hate to shop at any time of year and always struggled to figure out what to buy for the in-laws. Also hated wrapping presents since I'm bad at it and impatient with it. Evidently I'm not cut out for big family holidays.
I couldn't agree more; what a hassle TODAY'S typical Christmas is with families spread out all over the world and, if you're not into all the material crap (I think this level of consumerism is a kind of mass mental illness), it can be just a huge pain and stressor. That said, somehow when I gathered with my loved ones, that old Christmas magic took effect... But, in the absence of loved ones with whom to celebrate it now, I, too, look forward to a nice peaceful day full of selfish indulgences.
You're very welcome, Craig, and thank you for taking the time to respond. I'm so glad to hear that a plan for Christmas presented itself to you! We don't always get what we want, but the Universe usually gives us exactly what we need.
Your "warm welcome" Thanksgiving tale made me chuckle. I gave up on the "church hunt" by my mid 30's, and believe me, I tried for years! On the very rare occasion I visit a church these days, it's usually outside of a scheduled service or activity when I won't be annoyed by the hypocrisy. Mother Nature has always been my favorite church, and She welcomes me to the table always!!
Wishing you a beautiful Christmas and a New Year filled with excellent health, great joy, and abundant prosperity! : )
I know many will not be able to relate to this but I haven't had a guest in any apartment I lived in for almost 8 years. Safe to say no one will be coming over anytime soon. It's not by choice either. It's just the way it is...
It is difficult, obviously, when relatives die and you start finding yourself alone. But the key is to never let your life stagnate and to make sure that as you lose old relationships, you cultivate new ones, if that is what is important to you. (I'm very picky about who I befriend, so I'd say I really only have two close friends in the world, but I also have never found my personal fulfillment in external relationships.) That is why nursing homes honestly can sometimes be good for the elderly. Rather than just sitting alone all day in an empty house and looking out the window or at a television, it puts them around other people. Of course, then a lot of them have already become anti-social or very rigid in their ways and can't stand being forced to interact with people, but that's another problem.
Life is either too many people around, or too few, but never at the right time.
I am not alone. I have too many people in my life sometimes, lol, and I treasure my solitude when I need it. But I do miss having family. I lnow a ton of people but they are acquaintances mostly. I have a mother and siblings and I have that one daughter, but no one lives with me or near me. I bought a Christmas tree the other day that I'm going to put up because my dd and her boyfriend will be there Christmas Eve, but it would be nice to not be going by myself to buy a Christmas tree and then setting it up by myself.
On the other hand, I considered asking an older friend if she wanted to come along, but I know she would second guess whatever I picked out and go on and on about how much the tree costs, so I did CHOOSE to go alone.
Might ask her to come over and decorate and drink some wine this weekend, though.
I know many will not be able to relate to this but I haven't had a guest in any apartment I lived in for almost 8 years. Safe to say no one will be coming over anytime soon. It's not by choice either. It's just the way it is...
I don't celebrate Christmas (not for religious reasons) and I am going to be alone!
I live abroad. I don't have ties with my family. I don't have a lot of friends over here and the guy that I am/was dating is back in his homecountry for the holidays.
Hopefully, I will either be at home watching movies that day or having a nice day at the seaside.
I love my time alone because being around people all the time can be draining.
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