Is OKC a Good Move? (Oklahoma City, Norman: transplants, 2014, movers)

[phxgreenfire]

Okay, I have a unique situation:

My parents recently moved to Norman and I'm in Phoenix. The economy here is horrible (recession or not) and I'm adamant about moving to a new city for a lot of reasons, but mainly because it's next to impossible to find a job in my field in Phoenix. In my mind I'm thinking along the lines of San Francisco, LA or San Diego... but their local economies are just awful presently. In any case, it's important to note I'm out of work now. Anyway, I think my mom is doing what she can to keep our family together and has offered monetary incentives to move to Oklahoma. I feel it's a blatant ulterior motive to have the family nearby because most of my family lives in that area.

In any case, here are some factors I'm trying to consider, which complicate things:
-I'm desperate to earn some money. I believe OKC is handling the recession better than other parts of the country and a part of me thinks the idea of income is inviting, almost to a point of desperation
-No matter where I am I'm hesitant to take work that will hurt my resume in the future when the economy is better (i.e. working below my level)
-I have an MA in English and I'm looking to get into copywriting, proofreading, technical writing, editing, writing, etc.
-I have personal attributes that worry me about living there; i.e. gay, atheist, politically far left, attraction to walkable urban life, attraction to diversity in shopping, dining, bars etc.

I have some understanding of Oklahoma City life, but to be frank, I'm always bored when I go because I never have a car and am stuck at family functions, always get dragged to the same restaurants every time, don't really like the weather extremes (especially really cold weather, ice and snow) and stuff like that. In any case, I put off going to visit family and usually dread going because I feel so suffocated (though a lot of that has to do with my "Groundhog Day" visits there.)

-I guess some questions off the top of my head (though more could surface through dialogue) would be:
-Given all that, would it be better to politely decline the incentives and hold off for another city?
-Are there any (or many) jobs that could benefit my resume in the future? (In my experience, just a handful of cities have any opportunities, but I haven't looked in Oklahoma.)
-I don't think I'd be uncomfortable being openly gay there, but is there a wide variety of things to do year-round for GLBT people in the area?
-Ditto atheism, but would that go over really bad in Oklahoma City?
-Is there a wide variety of cuisines in the area? Beyond that, are there more eccentric options around? I guess some good examples of the latter would be wine and cheese bars, improvisational cuisine, etc.?
-Are there any parts of town that don't require a car?
-What is shopping like in Oklahoma City compared to other places?

Thanks in advance... this is just a major decision and I'm not sure where to go right now

[flintysooner]

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Given all that, would it be better to politely decline the incentives and hold off for another city?

Yes, because while people that do the "responsible" thing have short term satisfaction they often have long term regret. In your case it seems to me you feel you are being made to relocate to Oklahoma. That seems to me to indicate you will resent your mother because of it and resent yourself for missing the chance to follow a dream. Better to avoid resentment and regret in my view.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Are there any (or many) jobs that could benefit my resume in the future? (In my experience, just a handful of cities have any opportunities, but I haven't looked in Oklahoma.)

Yes, of course. There would be any number of jobs and opportunities that would not only benefit your resume but actually benefit you. But that's not unique to the area. You can do that anywhere including wherever you are now.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-I don't think I'd be uncomfortable being openly gay there, but is there a wide variety of things to do year-round for GLBT people in the area?

The gay people I know seem to have no problem finding things to do year round but that seems to me like an issue of personal preference. More population density is going to generally equate to more opportunities for personal and group interaction if that's what you're asking and Oklahoma is still relatively less dense than the other places you mentioned.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Ditto atheism, but would that go over really bad in Oklahoma City?

There are atheists here. Once I was one myself. I personally enjoyed arguing with those of the other persuasion then so Oklahoma was a good place for that for me.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Is there a wide variety of cuisines in the area? Beyond that, are there more eccentric options around? I guess some good examples of the latter would be wine and cheese bars, improvisational cuisine, etc.?

You might like 105 Degrees and there are lots of other places but again it isn't LA of San Francisco.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Are there any parts of town that don't require a car?

Nope.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-What is shopping like in Oklahoma City compared to other places?

A whole lot better than say Gotebo but not nearly so good as Dallas.

[Goodpasture]

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Given all that, would it be better to politely decline the incentives and hold off for another city?

How about you decide where you want to live and move there. If incentives are all that important then accept them.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Are there any (or many) jobs that could benefit my resume in the future? (In my experience, just a handful of cities have any opportunities, but I haven't looked in Oklahoma.)

As a businessman I prefer a resume showing a willingness to work and stick to it. Big gaps living off mom's incentives would be a red flag to me. 10 jobs in 10 weeks would be a negative as well. An interim job selling appliances at Best Buy while you get settled would simply tell me you are willing to work and support yourself.....that is an asset to me.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-I don't think I'd be uncomfortable being openly gay there, but is there a wide variety of things to do year-round for GLBT people in the area?

Why not? I don't think there is anything organized specifically for GLBT. On the other hand I don't see any problem with a GLBT participating in just about any other activity out there.

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Ditto atheism, but would that go over really bad in Oklahoma City?

You don't push it down our throats and we don't care what you are

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Is there a wide variety of cuisines in the area? Beyond that, are there more eccentric options around? I guess some good examples of the latter would be wine and cheese bars, improvisational cuisine, etc.?

not really......not that can compete with the left or right coasts

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-Are there any parts of town that don't require a car?

No

Originally Posted by phxgreenfire

-What is shopping like in Oklahoma City compared to other places?

I shop farm and ranch stores and find them adequate...........

[debzkidz]

Both of the previous posters are right all points.

As to your feeling of "Ground Hog Day" visits, I think that just comes from being stuck with family. I have those exact same feeling when I go visit my family and they live in Dallas. All we ever see is the inside of my parent's or my sister's house. And we too, dread being drug to the same horrible restaurants. My son recently asked if we couldn't just go to Dallas for a weekend and not tell the family we were there so we could actually see some of the city. We did actually try that once, and honestly while driving down a freeway, I looked over, and driving in the car next to me was my sister.

OKC is a very welcoming place and the gay people I know here don't seem to have a problem. If you are respectful of the people here, they will be respectful to you. Other than some gay bars in town, the only GLBT things I've heard of is during Pride Week. I know there are some events, including a parade, I believe. However, I'm not really up on all things "gay" in OKC, just as most gay guys in the city couldn't really tell you what's going on for middle-aged moms like myself.

As for being atheist, sure there are atheists here and you won't be shunned or anything. That said, do not be offended if one of the first questions you are asked by people is "Have you found a church home yet?". That is one of the first questions you will hear when people learn you are new to the area.

OKC is a city built for cars. The actual area of the city is somewhere north of 620 sq miles. It's bigger than Houston. You might be able to live in an area like The Paseo (an arts district) without a car, but even there, it would be very difficult. Mass transit here has a long way to go.

Shopping here is okay. Not great, but not horrible. I know a lot of people who just drive to Dallas for the day to shop.

If you don't like extreme weather, Oklahoma is not for you.

The thing about OKC is that it has a lot to offer if you are open to it. However, if you come here feeling as though you are being forced to be here, you will not like it.

[ERISAjunkie]

Perhaps you should consider moving to the NYC area. The publishing trades thrive here compared to the rest of the country. There is a large gay community with endless activities throughout the metropolitan area. Having a car in NYC is an expensive luxury. You don't need it except in the suburbs are some outling borough areas. Being an athiest is just another view in the mix- nobody cares.

[flintysooner]

This is an interesting thread. But I always try to read Goodpasture for sheer pleasure and I always learn something from debzkidz.

ERISAJunkie has a good idea but moving to NYC from Phoenix with no money might be a significant problem.

You know I'm starting to be fairly old now and I've lived in Oklahoma most of my life and no one has ever begun a conversation with me asking where I go to church. Probably it is just me because I see that many others have experienced this question. Usually if I am asked by someone it is after we know each other well enough to move beyond insouciant chitchat.

[Bass&Catfish2008]

Wow...my fellow Okies pretty much covered all the bases in their responses. Good job ya'll!

As for being gay/atheist in OK City....I think you will be totally fine if you you're ok with folks disagreeing with you from time to time on your points of view. From my experience, in general, you won't have any problems as long as you have a "live and let live" attitude. As long as you're not real "showy" with your orientation/political persuasion then I don't think you'll have any problem in the least.

I think the transplants that struggle the most with OK City (and Oklahoma) have an attitude of changing the culture and then get very frustrated when they realize they cannot. As long as you're cool with accepting Oklahoma City as is, I think Oklahoma City will oblige.

[debzkidz]

Originally Posted by flintysooner

This is an interesting thread. But I always try to read Goodpasture for sheer pleasure and I always learn something from debzkidz.

ERISAJunkie has a good idea but moving to NYC from Phoenix with no money might be a significant problem.

You know I'm starting to be fairly old now and I've lived in Oklahoma most of my life and no one has ever begun a conversation with me asking where I go to church. Probably it is just me because I see that many others have experienced this question. Usually if I am asked by someone it is after we know each other well enough to move beyond insouciant chitchat.

It's when people find out you are new to the area. They get all excited and want to invite you to their church. While I appreciate their concern for my soul, and although I am a Christian, it always makes me feel a bit uncomfortable. Kind of just puts you on the spot. After you've been here a while, everyone just assumes you go to church and they stop asking.

[phxgreenfire]

Oh wow... thanks everyone for posting. I want to address some things that came up. There are lots of good points, but I'll try to keep it shorter:

-Mom's incentives would be a quick fix. She would help out more financially until I found a job there. She has connections there and could try to help find a job... I just don't know what it would be. I know I come off as a deadbeat saying that, but I'm really trying hard to get employed again, though I haven't really been looking at just anything, because I don't want to sabotage my resume with, say, customer service or retail jobs. In my experience, most jobs in my field are in New York, Chicago and Los Angeles. To a lesser degree I've seen or heard of opportunities in other large Northeast cities and San Francisco. Seriously... for every three relevant jobs I find in LA, I find one in San Francisco, and that ratio is even worse looking in Phoenix. I'll admit, I haven't looked in OKC at all at this time. In any case, I can swing a move to LA or San Francisco on my own, but anything farther than that would be harder (though I think my family would spring for movers if I went to Oklahoma and I could stay with family until finding work.)

Originally Posted by flintysooner

In your case it seems to me you feel you are being made to relocate to Oklahoma. That seems to me to indicate you will resent your mother because of it and resent yourself for missing the chance to follow a dream. Better to avoid resentment and regret in my view.

I really agree with this. I mean, OKC didn't really come to mind until mom brought it up... repeatedly. I will admit, moving to any city takes on the risk of hating it. Those other cities I mentioned are inviting and I love them... but living in them might not be as great as they seem.

Originally Posted by ERISAjunkie

Perhaps you should consider moving to the NYC area. The publishing trades thrive here compared to the rest of the country.

-I would love to move to New York, but I don't think I have enough in savings to start off there... maybe one day. In any case, I've been looking at publishing companies, but corporate headquarters need communications and copywriting jobs, media companies have a lot of opportunities, etc. Unfortunately, those kinds of companies really seem to love clustering in the same aforementioned cities with sparser opportunities elsewhere.

Originally Posted by debzkidz

I know there are some events, including a parade, I believe. However, I'm not really up on all things "gay" in OKC, just as most gay guys in the city couldn't really tell you what's going on for middle-aged moms like myself.

Ha ha! That's awesome.

-I should've clarified the gay thing. Oops. I will give Phoenix that: it does have a decent scene with no shortage of activities. At least one bar is really busy every night per week. My birthday was Monday and we went out for drag bingo. Pride here attracts roughly 30,000 people, then Flagstaff and Tucson have their Pride events later. There's a mini-Pride/street festival in October and there are events throughout the year. There are GLBT restaurants, cafes, coffee bars, stores, social groups, etc. That being said, I'm not really huge into bars or most events though I like having the option if I decide to go. I'm totally comfortable with myself anywhere... same goes for atheism.

-The dining options might be harder. I think the dining scene in Phoenix is decent... but I like what I've seen in other cities better. Like I said about the family routine thing, there's a restaurant we always go to whenever I go called Johnnie's (sp?) but I'm a vegetarian and don't really like it. I'm one of those vegetarians that hates salads too. Really, I don't want to go out to eat just to eat lettuce.

-I don't like the car thing. I ideally would like to live somewhere I can walk to places. Unfortunately, those cities seem to be doing bad in this economy and that just might not be a reality, so I may have to take what I can get. Cars are pretty much mandatory in Phoenix, though I suppose you could get by without one if you live in the right areas and don't need to get to the wrong areas; i.e. I'm a 15 minute walk from the light rail, which I could take and transfer to a bus, and once my car broke down, but I couldn't get to my job because there was no public transit service to the office. I just like the option of public transit, but really love being able to walk places.

-I guess the shopping thing just is what it is, so is being invited to church. Out of curiosity, is it that offensive to reject a church offer? The last two time I went were by force: the most recent was after my friend died in a car accident and the pastor just gave her about 10 minutes of the sermon, though it was a regular service otherwise. Before that, the whole sermon was in Korean. I was uncomfortable at both, but the one in Korean really just made me bored.

-And about the weather... I'd just have to get over it, no matter where it is. The constant sun in Phoenix does get annoying though. I guess you could compare it to constant cloud cover in other cities. I'm tired of the heat too, so I'm ready for a change in that regard. Another ideal would be Southern California's weather: mild temperatures and more rain, but again... it's hard to find work there. San Francisco is still a bit chilly for me, but I'd get over it I'm sure. I know earthquakes are a part of life there, though I don't really like them. One hit Mexicali on Easter this year and it was strong enough to roll through Phoenix. Scary, but otherwise not too bad.

[flintysooner]

You may want to consider that the publishing industry is undergoing drastic changes right now.

It appears to me that we are at the beginning of the change rather than near the end so we probably don't really know what the future industry is going to look like. But it seems pretty certain that the old model is going to succumb to something new.

Technical writing is going to continue to require far more technical expertise than ever before while also requiring simpler and easier communication methods. Some have even wondered if the written technical manual will even survive.

And the entire concept of written communication is changing as well. There's been an article just recently floating around about how the Class of 2014 thinks e-mail is too slow and prefers texting with its notable abbreviated phrasing. And there is a lot of mixed media already and we're hardly away from the initial point of reference.

On the other hand content was and is still king and that is likely going to be even more important.

If you were to stay in Norman there are some notable nanotechnology companies and there is a large medical research effort associated with OU Health Sciences. And there is the entire energy industry. I'd probably lean to nanotechnology myself as that appears to be very significant for the future to me.

That's something else to keep in mind.