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I actually agree that 13-14 is far too young to start hair color, but honestly, it would depend on what my daughter wanted to do and why she wanted to do it. I would probably say okay to highlights or a temporary wash, depending on circumstances. My seven y.o. daughter has been asking for a mohawk for over a year. No way. No how.
Our girls are far too caught up in looks at too young an age. I think encouraging them to appreciate their natural beauty is the far better parenting approach to take.
And yes, it's perfectly okay for a parent to say "no" to the hair color request. We allow our children to earn certain privileges at certain ages...when we believe they are mature enough for the privileges. Nothing wrong with that. In my world "because I'm your mother and I'm not comfortable with that" is also a perfectly acceptable reason to deny any request.
To the original poster, last year, my daughter was in a play with a lovely 13 y.o. girl who had recently dyed her hair jet black. And while she was a terrific kid, the look is not a good one for someone so young. It aged her, and also, it was the reason she was only given a very small walk-on part in the show, despite being incredibly talented and experienced. It's a look that is too stark, and like it or not, there are implications that come along with that kind of a look, especially on a young girl.
I actually agree that 13-14 is far too young to start hair color, but honestly, it would depend on what my daughter wanted to do and why she wanted to do it. I would probably say okay to highlights or a temporary wash, depending on circumstances. My seven y.o. daughter has been asking for a mohawk for over a year. No way. No how.
Our girls are far too caught up in looks at too young an age. I think encouraging them to appreciate their natural beauty is the far better parenting approach to take.
And yes, it's perfectly okay for a parent to say "no" to the hair color request. We allow our children to earn certain privileges at certain ages...when we believe they are mature enough for the privileges. Nothing wrong with that. In my world "because I'm your mother and I'm not comfortable with that" is also a perfectly acceptable reason to deny any request.
To the original poster, last year, my daughter was in a play with a lovely 13 y.o. girl who had recently dyed her hair jet black. And while she was a terrific kid, the look is not a good one for someone so young. It aged her, and also, it was the reason she was only given a very small walk-on part in the show, despite being incredibly talented and experienced. It's a look that is too stark, and like it or not, there are implications that come along with that kind of a look, especially on a young girl.
Well she sure would be the most original person in class
Personally I think it is perfectly proper that she ask permission. In fact if I were going to radically change my appearance, grow beard, dye hair, I would discuss it with my wife and in a way "get her permission". Even more so for a child and especially as we believe that kids should obey their parents.
Aidxen, I know this isn't about your 14 yr old wanting to dye her hair (my stepdaughter, 14 yr old step granddaughter, and 5 or 6 of her girlfriends had a "hair dying party" one weekend. Wish I still had THOSE pictures! lol). But on your topic about asking your wife about growing a beard. I've had a beard since before my 25 yr old son was born. I asked my wife what she thought about me shaving it off. She begged me not to for any reason! When I asked why? She has seen old pictures of me without it!
I was in no way, shape or form a lazy parent. I did all the real work of actual parenting and have great kids to prove it.
Because I would allow my daughter who is a freshman in high school to dye her hair does not make me anyhing you implying. It makes me a parent who picks her battles and doesn't sweat the small stuff.
You wouldn't want me to be judgemental about your parenting style, now would you?
And I never said you were! I SAID, "if the shoe doesn't fit don't try to wear it"
In addition, we were discussing 12 year olds being allowed to dye their hair in middle school. High school is a whole other ball game.
The problem of lazy parenting is very real. Too many Dr. Spock babies would rather be their childs "friend" than do the real work of actually parenting. It doesn't make me judgemental to state the truth.
Well then I certainly don't understand your intent. This thread is about people allowing or not allowing their 14 year-old daughters to color their hair. You state you wouldn't allow it, and then infer people who do are not good parents, but trying to be friends of their children, and that they are lazy parents. It's pretty clear. Is that not what you meant?
Well then I certainly don't understand your intent. This thread is about people allowing or not allowing their 14 year-old daughters to color their hair. You state you wouldn't allow it, and then infer people who do are not good parents, but trying to be friends of their children, and that they are lazy parents. It's pretty clear. Is that not what you meant?
This is what happens when people don't read every post in a thread
And believe me, I've done it myself, so I'm not trying to pick on you
But you apparently missed some of the conversation because I was actually responding to paganmama when she questioned why another poster would say no to her 13 year old wanting to dye her hair. Then that led to another poster with a 12 year old who wanted highlights. So for a few posts there we were discussing girls younger than our OP's daughter. I was saying it is irresponsible of parents of kids in middle school to let them grow up so fast, but unfortunately too many parents these days would rather just be "friends" with their kids rather than do the hard work of parenting them.
I still don't see how dying hair is something mature and for a specific age and older to do.
Its changing a hair color and nothing more.
WE add all these implications to crap.
I was able to dye my hair at 12/13. I didn't do it to look sexy or attract boys or look older. I simply wanted to test out other hair colors.
I have been picking my own hair cuts since I was 7 or 8.
And I think 12/13 is old enough to comprehend that it can damage your hair a little each time, if there is a 12/13 year old who doesn't then maybe that 12/13 year old is a little developmentally challenged and doesn't understand simple stuff like that because by that age they should be able to, so that shouldn't be a parents excuse.
Well she sure would be the most original person in class
I respectfully disagree. There is nothing original about that look. In fact, it's become a bit of a cliche.
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That is high school.
