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Maybe it's where you live that folks are more conservative,where there are children eveywhere and churches are everywhere,here in california,there are so many married couples with no children,they would say it's by choice,and it's their business.
Just tell them you keep trying but nothing yet. If they keep pushing after that, proceed to tell them (in as much detail as necessary) about all the different and exotic positions you've tried...and that will usually shut them up. For the fun of it...invent some crazy ones for story telling purposes and tell them that your sex therapist recommended it!
Ignore your critics. I LOVE my children and I can't imagine my life without them... with that - people have the right to be childless without being hassled about it.
Just tell them you keep trying but nothing yet. If they keep pushing after that, proceed to tell them (in as much detail as necessary) about all the different and exotic positions you've tried...and that will usually shut them up. For the fun of it...invent some crazy ones for story telling purposes and tell them that your sex therapist recommended it!
that's great, better yet, next time your at their house tell them the wife is ovulating right this minute and would they mind if you used their bedroom for about an hour. that should shut them up.
i do feel really bad for you, that's terrible that they do that to you!!
My wife and I are getting more and more flack from so called friends and family because we have decided to not have children. Many of the more religious ones are saying that my wife is not fulfilling her role as a female on the human race. The less outspoken ones tell us that something is wrong with us because we are not parents but do not say it is an obligation, just an expectation. We are not invited to many family activities because we do not have children.
I suspect many people are not as strong and have children because they are overwhelmed by peer and family pressures. No wonder there are so many bad parents out there.
Do not worry about what other people think. If the decision the two of you made is right for you two, that is ALL that matters!!!!!!!!!!
My wife and I are getting more and more flack from so called friends and family because we have decided to not have children. Many of the more religious ones are saying that my wife is not fulfilling her role as a female on the human race. The less outspoken ones tell us that something is wrong with us because we are not parents but do not say it is an obligation, just an expectation. We are not invited to many family activities because we do not have children.
I suspect many people are not as strong and have children because they are overwhelmed by peer and family pressures. No wonder there are so many bad parents out there.
I'm really sorry that you're going through this; this is not right. No one should be forced to have children if they don't want to. You should only have children IF you and your wife want to, not because family and friends want you to. They're not going to raise your children but they act like they are. There is nothing wrong with you. Having children should be something that's in your heart, NOT an obligation. I cringe when I hear the word, "obligation" as it pertains to having children or "fulfilling the female role" - what is this, the dark ages? I could go on and on about that comment alone, but I won't go there.
As far as not being invited to functions, I can believe this (although it is sad) because people tend to invite people who are like themselves (having common interests). My husband and I have a large family with kids from ages 25 to age 7, and we've found that we do not get invitations from family and friends who have a smaller family (less kids) or no kids. I really feel sad about this. What a terrible way to segregate people and friendships.
It is unfortunate that this happens. I can see how friends would find it difficult to relate to you if they have kids and you don't. Did you ever see the Sex and the City episode where Carrie called Miranda with some guy problem, and Miranda said she didn't have time for it, she had real problems with her new baby? I can see drifting apart as your priorities and interests are no longer the same, but I do not think it is right for them to judge you or your decision. It is YOUR decision. they don't have to like it or understand it!
No one should be treated like an outcast because they don't spend their lives having kids...I for one don't particularly want kids. People constantly do the "youll change your mind" speech, and "oh, how can you not love a baby?".
Nope, I don't. And it won't affect any of them whether I have kids or not!
If you have no kids you're weird, if you have too many kids you're weird - WHATEVER!!!!! I can't believe the "womanly duty" comments, that is ridiculous! Everyone needs to do what works for them, and everyone else needs to keep their opinions to themselves. My husband and I were together for 5 years before we had kids, so we got a little of what you're speaking of. I was 30 when we had the first, and 31 for the 2nd, so then we got our share of "Oh gosh, was it an accident" at that time!
Our kids are 10 and 11, and we have friends with kids, without kids, and even single friends, it's all good!!! You do what you want!
My wife and I are getting more and more flack from so called friends and family because we have decided to not have children. Many of the more religious ones are saying that my wife is not fulfilling her role as a female on the human race. The less outspoken ones tell us that something is wrong with us because we are not parents but do not say it is an obligation, just an expectation. We are not invited to many family activities because we do not have children.
I suspect many people are not as strong and have children because they are overwhelmed by peer and family pressures. No wonder there are so many bad parents out there.
Here's what you do...you go on lovely vacations together, just the two of you. You take great pictures while you're on vacation, and send them liberally to all your sour family members. Make sure you write on each one saying something like:
"We're having a GREAT TIME because we don't have kids! Sorry this note is so short but we're off to have our massages and our pedicures and then we're going deep-sea fishing before our lobster dinner tonight! We'll write you again soon, from the next exotic locale in our itinerary! Ciao!"
Ditto for when you buy something new and expensive, like that 60" flatscreen television or that sporty new car or that new beach house. They want to bag on you for deciding not to have kids? Eff 'em.
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