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My wife will be leaving for a 7 week trip to China for her job. Can anyone give me any advice on what to expect and how to handle my 4 year old daughter during my wife's absence?
One of the problems that I'm foreseeing is I work 3rd shift so I will not be home at night with my daughter. We have arranged with friends and family to care for her overnight while I work but it still is my largest area of concern.
Also can anyone give any advice on how to prepare my daughter for the absence?
Last edited by Duk123; 05-31-2011 at 08:37 AM..
Reason: spelling
Have your wife record herself reading some of your daughter's favorite books so that she can listen to them at night.
She can write notes and leave them with you to read to your daughter also.
Skype is a great tool, if you are able to set it up.
whatever your daughter's nightly routine is, make sure it is communicated to friends so that it can be followed. Your daughter can even help with this - have her explain her routine as your wife writes it down.
We just bought a second laptop so we can Skype each night before bed. Not sure how Skype will work with the wife being in China, I know most social media such as Facebook and Twitter are blocked overthere.
We have been talking to my daughter about the trip and she understands in concept that mommy will be gone but as you know concept and reality with a 4yr old are two different things.
My wife is also planning to mail a postcard each day of her trip so hopefully one will be waiting each day for my daughter and I to read.
I wouldn't count on the mail working so quickly....does she have an itinerary? Could she write a bit in 4 year old speak about what she plans to do each day, and leave those notes with you, perhaps with a map?
My parents travel extensively, and their postcards to my kids sometimes don't show until weeks after they return. I don't remember specifically about China, but even the ones from europe have a time lag.
One thing for your wife to check is: Does she have a VPN to work (Virtual Private network). If she can VPN into her company network, all the data/websties/skype does not go thru the .CN internet but will go out of her US based internet connection. All that data is sent from CN to US encripted. She should talk with IT staff to ensure she can get out to things like Facebook/Personal Email/Skype from work.
PostCards: Sound like a great idea, but the Lag will be huge. I would suggest she write them up before she leaves and you mail them to DD from within the US. DD mostly likely not notice the stamps on it at 4yo.
You have some very good suggestions; try to be positive and upbeat about it. I still remember when my father left for a year for Vietnam. I was about 4 years old and I was devastated; afraid; emotional. It was HARD. Of course, there's a difference between 7 weeks and a year.
My dad sent us tapes and we sent him tapes - so that helped.
The Skype would be wonderful if it worked; I love the idea of your wife reading some books on tape for her to listen to.
Have your wife document the trip (think scrapbook) and turn it into something to share with your daughter upon arrival. Collecting things such as newpapers, maps, photographs, etc. Can really be a good learning/bonding experience upon her arrival! Maybe buy her some quality children's books about the culture to "tie everything together".
How about using "mommy's pillow" while she's gone? Or letting her snuggle with mom's robe at night? My kids come to the room before bed and grab daddy's pillow when he's traveling.
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