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My son start kindergarten in August. He just turned 5 years old in May. Many kids in our neighborhood takes the bus but I am really concerned letting my only child on a bus by himself. I talked to my ex baby sitter and she told me all her kids take the bus and have been sense they started school. She says it teaches them independence. Well, I am really worried and not comfortable at all with the idea. He is still so childish and trust everybody, maybe a little bit too much. If something would happen to him; I would never forgive myself.
How do you guys feel. Should I let go and let him ride the bus or should I drive him to school myself. I am available to drop him off at school every day if I choose to. Do you feel I am to over protective?
Dear Glass:
No advice for you because my town was too small for buses, but you might want to bookmark my thread to refer to 15 years from now:
That's funny. I left my whole family behind when I moved here from Sweden. They feel and felt the same way you do. It does get easier, I can tell you that
I would do whatever you and your child are comfortable with. He's only 5 years old. Driving him to school is not going to prevent him from learning independence or growing up to be a normal child. I would be a little nervous about putting my 5 year old on the bus too, but I think my fear would be older, bigger kids, their behavior, and how they treated the little ones.
As far as being fearful of abductions, take reasonable precautions--such as walking your child to the bus stop and waiting with him, or making sure he's with a group and not alone--but never let your fear prevent him from doing something normal as riding the bus to school. Teach him about not talking to strangers, not going to anybody's car, just reasonable things that every kid should know, and reasonable supervision on your part, and he will be fine. I know child abduction stories are horrible and terrifying, but as others have mentioned, the likelihood of your boy getting snatched off the street is rare.
When I went to the pre-K meeting, the school people said they recommended the bus kids ride the bus from day 1. We drove over to the school the first day to watch the kids get off the bus (after waiting with our daughter at the bus stop). The bus stop became a very social place for parents that kindergarten year. The bus dropped my kids off near the house at mid-day. I could watch from the house.
One thing to consider is what is the 'norm' in your area? In my area riding the bus is NOT the norm, so my thoughts and experience are based in driving my children to school as the first, best and most times only option.
I think I understand that your fears are more about your son than about any potential stranger dangers. He may not yet be able to make decisions that are best for him when presented with a choice. There are plenty of news stories of children getting on the wrong bus with and ending up at the wrong school. Or getting off the bus at the wrong stop and wandering around lost. Or not getting on the bus at all and being left at school. Or falling asleep on the bus and not noticed. Such a small, young and inexperienced child may not be able to speak up and take care of these kind of mistakes.
So is it the 'norm' for your school to have more students riding the bus to school than to be driven? Is it the 'norm' for your school to have a policy in place to provide top safety measures for bus riders? IS is the 'norm' for you school to use check lists to ensure every one who gets on gets off and at the correct places? Is it the 'norm' for your school to open to extra efforts for the start of the year, especially with the younger riders?
Here, there are literally only a small handful of students who ride the bus to elementary schools around here because we have neighborhood schools, meaning most houses are less than 2 miles from the school. The policy for riding the bus is you have to live further than that 2 mile marker. You might have 10 kids total riding a bus to school of 500 due to living a bit further out or due to living across a street designated as busy/dangerous street. Added to that, the bus stops are generally located at corners of main streets, which may be out of sight of their own house. Combined that can be a very trying situation for a younger, smaller, inexperienced and less confident child.
My experience is that taking my children to school is a wonderful choice. It gives them opportunity to sleep in a little later than if they had to take a bus. That gives us time to do breakfast together at home and the best part is the discussions we get to have on that 5-10 minute ride to school.
If you don't have to use the bus, I'd suggest taking advantage of that and offer him an easier opportunity to start with. I doubt you will regret it. He will already have to adjust to a long structured day, new building, routines, friends, teachers and other staff. Eliminate the bus at first and that may go a long way in making the new year easier for him.
I definitely wouldn't start out driving him to school and then switching to the bus later in the same year. He'll be the "newbie" on the bus, and the easy target for bullies due to that one little detail alone. If his charm and personality keep him afloat amidst bullies just aching for an "excuse" to bully someone, he'll still be intruding on a rhythm that was already set by the existing batch of kids. He'll need more time to adjust, than the kids who started out together at the beginning of the year. They will already have determined their seats on the bus, they'll already have their "bus ride rituals," and they'll already know who they're gonna hang out with, talk to, avoid, run from, ignore. Your son will be "that kid" who just shows up out of nowhere in the middle of all this. Even if he knows most of th kids and are friendly with them, they will already have their bus routine down.
Don't let your kid be an intruder in his own "neighborhood." Either send him on the bus from day 1, or commit to taking him every day for the entire year.
My son start kindergarten in August. He just turned 5 years old in May. Many kids in our neighborhood takes the bus but I am really concerned letting my only child on a bus by himself. I talked to my ex baby sitter and she told me all her kids take the bus and have been sense they started school. She says it teaches them independence. Well, I am really worried and not comfortable at all with the idea. He is still so childish and trust everybody, maybe a little bit too much. If something would happen to him; I would never forgive myself.
How do you guys feel. Should I let go and let him ride the bus or should I drive him to school myself. I am available to drop him off at school every day if I choose to. Do you feel I am to over protective?
I think 5 is too young but if your child seems interested in trying it I would wait with him at the bus stop until he got on the bus. Then zoom in your car to the school and be there as he's getting off so you can get his immediate reaction to riding the bus. Check out the driver and the other kids and see if any of the kids look upset, scared, crying or unhappy.
If you don't feel comfortable sending him on the bus then it's fine to drive him. I think a lot of 5 year olds would feel nervous riding the bus alone. Going to school is usually a pretty big step teaching independence anyway.
I rode the bus when I was 6-7 but my mom walked me to and from the stop every day. I think 5 would have been too young for me.
I definitely wouldn't start out driving him to school and then switching to the bus later in the same year. He'll be the "newbie" on the bus, and the easy target for bullies due to that one little detail alone. If his charm and personality keep him afloat amidst bullies just aching for an "excuse" to bully someone, he'll still be intruding on a rhythm that was already set by the existing batch of kids. He'll need more time to adjust, than the kids who started out together at the beginning of the year. They will already have determined their seats on the bus, they'll already have their "bus ride rituals," and they'll already know who they're gonna hang out with, talk to, avoid, run from, ignore. Your son will be "that kid" who just shows up out of nowhere in the middle of all this. Even if he knows most of th kids and are friendly with them, they will already have their bus routine down.
Don't let your kid be an intruder in his own "neighborhood." Either send him on the bus from day 1, or commit to taking him every day for the entire year.
Another good reason to drive him to school. "Bus culture".
Another good reason to drive him to school. "Bus culture".
Good point!
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