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1) I didn't want to fight about it in public( and yes she would do that)
2) I feel that his mom does treat him like a child and I feel like I have his best interest at heart.
Your intentions are good. I am going to say something that I hope you take the right way. I mean to try and be helpful. Grow a pair! If she starts fighting in public, you get up and leave.
Your intentions are good. I am going to say something that I hope you take the right way. I mean to try and be helpful. Grow a pair! If she starts fighting in public, you get up and leave.
and just give her one minute to follow you to the car.
I kept my promise to her and told her that i wanted to go out and have a nice dinner last night. I tried to keep things light hearted. She looked really beautiful and i told her she did multiple times( this made her blush). Turns out my son's Chicago trip was uneventful. She spent her weekend rotating between sitting in a bathtub and sleeping.The place we went was quiet and real romantic. Like I said, it was lighthearted and we spent our time reminiscing about our early dating years. She proceeded to drop a bomb on me " Sweetie, I don't want to go to therapy anymore." Wedon't need it, look at us, having dinner together, being nice to each other, we don't need it, we'refine". As I've said before, counseling helps my peace of mind and I hope and feel that my son feels the same way.
She proceeded with an overloaded amount of puppy dog eyes and lip pouting. She proceeded to ask me if I was going to make her go. I told her that she was a grown woman who could make her own choices but that I would still be going to marriage counseling( alone) and family counseling with him. She was pretty bubbly the rest of the night seeing as how she got out of counseling. She went so far as to tell me, when we got home, that I could give her a kiss, because I had " earned it." When we got home at around 1( after dinner and just driving around) he was just watching TV alone on the couch with his feet on the coffee table( no feet on the table is kind of a rule but not a serious offense) she yelled at him for being awake and having his feet up. I really see no justification for her anger, he's 18 and the table was no big deal. She told him to go to his room and she would deal with him in the morning. They were sleeping when I left so I have no ida what she said to him.
Irish, did you tell her that the marriage is NOT fine? She either has her head in the sand about your feelings, or doesn't care. If the marriage is important to her, she needs to participate in the therapy. It sounds as though she wants you to give up, go back to the way things were and have you "earn" her affections by treating her to what she wants. Please don't do that....you will be doing yourself a grave disservice. If she absolutely refuses to go, continue on your own. But I would tell her the progress you make in therapy may not have the outcome she expects.
And there you have it. Irish, give it up and just deal with it. Accept you have no voice or respect in this marriage. Just do her bidding and keep your misery to yourself. That'll make her happy, and in the end, that's all that matters to you.
You were meant for each other. Just how deep are those heel marks on your back?
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