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There is this one teacher that hates my son. He gets written up once a week and has served a suspension. Everyone in his school says he does nothing; including the other teachers. He just keeps getting written up. What should I do now?
You haven't given much information. How old is your son?
I never heard of a school backing a suspension that was given for no reason. What does the teacher say is the problem?
Earlier in the year you might have requested a transfer into a different class, at this point, maybe your son just needs to stay in his seat and do his work.
You haven't given much information. How old is your son?
I never heard of a school backing a suspension that was given for no reason. What does the teacher say is the problem?
Earlier in the year you might have requested a transfer into a different class, at this point, maybe your son just needs to stay in his seat and do his work.
Son is 11 and is in 5th grade. He has a 90+ in every class except this one (Math.)
I would request a meeting with the school counselor, Principal and teacher. Writing him up and suspending him clearly isn't "fixing" it, so there needs to be some kind of "meeting of the minds" on whatever the alleged problem is and some kind of directed plan on resolving it.
I doubt that he is getting written up for no reason. Detentions and suspensions require documentation - no teacher would do it for nothing. Something is going on in there - either he is misbehaving, or the teacher has it in for him, or both. I agree with mjd07. Schedule a meeting with counselor, teacher and an administrator, ASAP, and then LISTEN to what they have to say, instead of defending him. Then have a serious discussion with him, explaining that if the behavior that is getting him suspended continues, there will be serious consequences at home, in addition to school. This could be the beginning of a big problem, or the end of a little problem, depending upon how you handle it.
Just a gentle reminder - some kids when they decide a teacher doesn't like them, act up in that particular class giving the teacher justification for writing them up, even though they are practically little angels the rest of the day. He also may be acting up in that class in particular because he is struggling academically with the subject. Regardless, the fact that he only has issues with that teacher means there is a problem that needs to be addressed and should be able to be fixed. Meet with the teacher, counselor, and maybe the principal, as others have suggested. Please do it with an open mind, don't assume the position of defense lawyer for your child, and actually listen to the teacher's side.
You do need to have a discussion with your son about having to learn to deal with people we don't like or who appear to not like us, as it happens all the time in life and that it isn't a valid excuse for him to misbehave. That is a tough life lesson, some people never get it sorted out.
I once had knew a student at my school who had an issue only with me. I had redirected him in bus line like I do with everyone and offended him. He became embarrassed and lashed out. Being a new teacher, I calmly just wrote him up. Then that made him even angrier and he started to really act out, and only at dismissal. I finally asked to switch bus duty, because I had to write him up for acting out and his behavior was not improving. We were both miserable.
Tension alone can cause a teacher to write a student up.
When I was about the same age, I was 12, in 7th grade. We had just started to have more than one teacher and a schedule where we changed classes. I got along fabulously with every teacher except one.
She would nit pick about everything. She hated my handwriting, my letters were too "bubbly". It was my style, still kinda is. It was very legible, still is. It was a non-issue she turned into an issue.
She HATED me popping my back and neck, which has been a habit since I was really little, like 8 or so. It helps and I love it. She'd tell me things like she would give me detention if I kept doing it. I finally told her to do it because when she did my mom would be down there to explain my back and neck issues to her and that she couldn't control what I did with my own body.
It sounds like you have already heard your son's side of the issue. Like others have said, I would schedule a meeting with the teacher, the principal, and the school psychologist. Get the issues out in the open. Talk to the rest of his teachers also. If there is a consistent problem, have some testing done to see if your child actually has a behavioral problem...or maybe the teacher just doesn't like him for some reason.
Getting everyone together like this will put the teacher on the defensive. The professionals will be able to determine where the problem lies. If necessary, move him out of that teacher's class.
It's awful for both the child and the teacher to have to go through a whole year together when they don't care for each other. Fortunately, this year will be wrapping up soon. Even still, you want to know what is going on for everyone's benefit. Good luck.
Son is 11 and is in 5th grade. He has a 90+ in every class except this one (Math.)
Meet with the teacher but also consider having the son transferred to another teacher's class. Sometimes it's just personality differences and you can't assume that all teachers are perfect or fair.
I had trouble with some teacher when my son was learning to multiply and divide fractions. She wanted them to show their work step by step by step by step --- she had a ridiculous way of working out fractions and accused my son of cheating because he didn't show 9 or 10 different steps because he could do a lot of it in his head and trying to get him to do so many steps actually confused him.
If you meet with the teacher, you can see for yourself what the teacher is about. Some teachers actually have trouble with kids who are smart because they themselves are average and identify more with the average kids.
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