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I am struggling with a video game related issue. I'd like to hear what other parents think about this situation...
My husband and our two boys play video games. No issue there. But my husband really likes the Grand Theft Auto franchise, and when he has downtime with nothing else to do he will play those games.
Oldest son saw dad playing the GTA games when he was about middle school age. We told him that when he was in high school he could play them, too, but at the time we felt middle school was too young to play games like that. Too much sexual content and too much graphic violence.
So now oldest son is in high school and both he and his dad play GTA5.
Enter the issue: youngest brother is in middle school, watching his dad and older brother play GTA5. To make matters worse, all his friends seemed to receive GTA5 for Christmas as gifts and are now playing online together - my son feels totally left out. His dad, brother, and friends are all playing this game.
He doesn't have the game and we have not allowed him to play it yet.
What should we do?
On the one hand, he's already going to be exposed to it via his friends, his dad, his brother.
On the other hand, we didn't allow his brother to play those games until he was in high school. Not to mention the fact that those games contain a lot of really sleazy sexual content. (the language and violence thing is everywhere - not just games - so we lost that battles years ago). If you're not familiar with those games... http://www.videogamer.com/xbox360/gt...emberment.html
So is he sitting around watching your husband and son play the game? If so he's being exposed to everything anyway. I'm not sure what banning him from playing the game is going to protect him from at this point.
GTA was one of those games that our son didn't play. I know other stuff he played later was maybe more violent. I guess my issue was the sexual content, etc. Back then only one friend had it. Otherwise they were in to other games when he was with his best friend.
The mistake you made if you wanted to keep him from it was letting dad play it in front of either of them.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L2DB
So middle school is like 6th or 7th grade, right? 12-13ish?
Meh, I'd let him play it, especially if he's already watching Dad/Brother play it. 7th grade now is like 10th grade 15 years ago, IMO.
FWIW, I haven't played GTA since the 3rd one when I was younger so maybe it's a lot worse now. IDK. What does your husband think?
I agree with you. If he watches network TV the stuff there is just as bad. At this point the OP has no leverage. I'd explain the difference between real and fantasy violence.
Not fair to allow the stuff in the house for Dad and older brother and not let him participate. Personally, I don't think any of them should be doing it. But you can't allow Dad and brother to do this while younger brother is in the house, and say he cannot join in. And even if they do it only while younger brother is asleep or away, younger brother will still get at it - it's too tempting. Get my point? It's just not appropriate to have this material in the house with young children, or even teenagers.
Let him play. My brother plays those games and has for years now.
DB borrowed the newest version of gta from a friend and I've been playing too.
I usually drive around and knock over light poles or play tennis, it's not the worst ever.
Probably would've been better if DH had limited his game time to when the kids were asleep or not there and then kept the game in his room, but since that ship has sailed, I would not let DS2 play it. It's easy to say they are exposed to it anyway, but at what point does the line shift too far by something you may overhear in the locker room, or catch in a TV show when your mom isn't home, versus mom and dad condoning a very violent and sexual game as "acceptable" for you when you're 12 or 13?
I understand the point another poster was making when he said 7th grade is like 10th grade used to be... but I don't think that's a good thing, and whether or not there will be areas in which he's exposed to things earlier, I would not simply throw my hands up and completely give in either. Whether he's exposed to things earlier doesn't mean that 7th graders have magically become more emotionally capable of handling that sort of thing than they were a decade ago. So I wouldn't be quick to just let the floodgates open and let them do anything they want.
Personally, I would kick around the idea of asking DH to be the bad guy and put the game away.
If his friends have it, he might be playing at their house. It's hard to control everything young teens do when they're not under your watchful eye all the time. This can be a problem even with smaller children. We knew a family that didn't allow their son to watch TV, and whenever he was at someone else's house, that's all he wanted to do. Sometimes prohibiting something makes it more alluring. I'd let him play it with dad and the older brother since it's too late to put that genie back in the bottle, and he knows too much about it at this point.
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