No independent play (toys, parent, boy, playing)

[Homewardbound66]

Hi! I have a question I would like to put out there. I have one son who just turned 5 years old and he absolutely will not play at all independently. If I don't play with him at any time during the day he just stops playing. How can I encourage my son to play independently? I am a stay at home mom and he's my only one and I enjoy playing with him, but I can't play with him ALL day. Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated. Thank you.

[nicolepsy]

oh my! wow! i feel for you!
i have no idea what to tell you!

[Homewardbound66]

Originally Posted by nicolepsy

oh my! wow! i feel for you!
i have no idea what to tell you!

Thanks Nicolepsy. I may be on to something. I told him if he doesn't play with his toys then there's no reason to receive more for Christmas. He just got new toys a week ago (birthday). Boy did the toys come out then and he spent "some" time with each one. Its a start, but I sure would like to do this without that kind of threat. I get the parental guilt trips so frequent that I have a free pass lately.

[nicolepsy]

wow! dont thank me, i didnt do anything! im happy for ya though!
do not feel guilty. all kids need to learn how to amuse themselves and play alone. it's good for them really!

[mm_mary73]

Originally Posted by Homewardbound66

Hi! I have a question I would like to put out there. I have one son who just turned 5 years old and he absolutely will not play at all independently. If I don't play with him at any time during the day he just stops playing. How can I encourage my son to play independently? I am a stay at home mom and he's my only one and I enjoy playing with him, but I can't play with him ALL day. Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated. Thank you.

Any mother's morning out programs around? Pre-schools?

[Inthesierras]

For awhile I was putting most of my kids toys in a big bag in the garage. I would rotate out 2-3 new toys every few days. This made them fun, because the kids always had 'new' toys. If you don't see something for a month, it becomes new again. If your child is 5, are there any kids in the neighborhood that he can play with?

[regarese]

What if you modeled a little independent play for him? Pick up a toy to play with and when he wants to join you, explain how you want to have fun by yourself with this toy and encourage him to get one of his other toys to play with while you play with yours. Not in a mean way-I'm sure you would know how to word it so your son sees it as a positive thing. Then gradually, your "alone fun" could be whatever chore you're trying to get done, and he plays by himself.

[poconoproud]

Originally Posted by Homewardbound66

Hi! I have a question I would like to put out there. I have one son who just turned 5 years old and he absolutely will not play at all independently. If I don't play with him at any time during the day he just stops playing. How can I encourage my son to play independently? I am a stay at home mom and he's my only one and I enjoy playing with him, but I can't play with him ALL day. Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated. Thank you.

You can have another. My daughter became much more independent after her brother came along.

[Homewardbound66]

Originally Posted by mm_mary73

Any mother's morning out programs around? Pre-schools?

We do belong to a Mommy's group (MOPS) and they meet the first and third Thursday of the month. Its pretty great, BUT the last 3 meetings things have come up and we couldn't attend. I'm almost afraid to join things because either my son is ill, I have a doctor's appointment and other lame things. I really have a problem commiting to things. I even put off going to a church in the fear of commiting every weekend Sunday to going there. There - I sound like a horrible person and this is me. I can't come clean with many people and so I do it on a forum like this.

[Homewardbound66]

Originally Posted by poconoproud

You can have another. My daughter became much more independent after her brother came along.

I wasn't sure we would have any children because we flipped flopped for so long. I was 36 years old when I had my son and now I'm 41 years old with a lot of problems in the reproductive area. I can't even consider having another for those obvious reasons and we couldn't financially afford more than our son. I really want to be able to buy his college education or as much as we can because I never got it and my husband never finished either. I think we can make it, but he HAS to have it. I did the student loans for the college I did have and I would like to give him the gift of education instead of a car or whatever. I wish we had decided earlier to have kids and maybe then we would have had more, but can't do it now. God's given him to us as a gift and I unwrap it every day and thank him, BUT some days I get tired, frustrated and inadequate. I am thankful for this forum though and for the people that take the time to post.