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If they were not clean, would it be your place to say anything? Define clean.
Also, define "harm" ...so we can understand when we can signal for a "change in lanes" to "protect kids from harm".
Not clean would mean suffering from neglect. Not a kid who played outside and got dirty. I think we all know the difference, at least I hope so.
And yes, if I saw a neglected child, I would say something. A kid who just didn't fit my personal standard of cleanliness, I would keep my opinion to myself unless asked.
By the way, teaching reading and writing is not officially a parental responsibility. This is why you have a mandatory educational system implemented in modern societies; because society cannot count on parents to do it.
Some will, but that doesn't mean all will, or all should.
I fully disagree. You need to prepare your children for school and work with them after school to better prepare them for a better life and the workforce (or make millions of dollars so they may never have to work again).
When my child started TK she was way past the children who came in from preschool. She was able to read sight words, spell and write her full name, know her opposites etc.
Teaching her these things is a way to bond if done correctly. School is fun for her. Some teachers can have 30 kids in a classroom they don't have time to focus on an individual child.
I never insinuated that but now that you said it, why shouldn't a parent have to raise his/her own child? I said that you should spend time with your children. I didn't say spend all of your time with your children. Although, I don't understand why it's okay to have a child and not raise it.
Well, whether or not it's "OK" has to do with your values.
We live in a world where people share fewer values than ever before.
You can certainly judge people who don't share your values.
You can vent about it with like-minded people.
You can place a bumper sticker on your car communicating your dislike of parents who refuse to spend the amount of time time you deem appropriate with their children.
Hey, you may even manage to secretly slap a "Kick me!" sticky on the back of such a parent if you can get away with it. (This is not easy - but admittedly, tempting ).
But unless you manage to make a convincing case at the community/state/national level that would allow you to advance legislation that would outlaw the type of behavior you decry, not a darn thing is going to change about it.
You'll just continue to be free to judge. Btw, keep fighting for this right - it can come in handy.
You asked how is it OK to NOT spend time, etc...but I told you "how" earlier.
Now sure what else I could add.
I haven't read all the responses, but I really think you need to separate the work/day care situation from the weekend situation. People work. It is how our society operates. Whether they "need" to or not is not for you to decide. If people don't like it, then they need to push to raise the minimum wage and push for policies that benefit the middle class not the 1%. if the economy turns around, maybe more families could afford to have a parent at home.
As for the weekends,I think that is where this discussion should be.imo , no people shouldn't hand their kids off every weekend so they can party. who is to decide how much is too much though.
Not clean would mean suffering from neglect. Not a kid who played outside and got dirty. I think we all know the difference, at least I hope so.
And yes, if I saw a neglected child, I would say something. A kid who just didn't fit my personal standard of cleanliness, I would keep my opinion to myself unless asked.
Yeah, but it's still not clear how "neglected" differs from your "personal standard of cleanliness".
You said "not clean would means suffering from neglect".
1: I know.. out of all of the people I've said no to she is one of the few people I can't say no to.
And she knows this, and that's exactly why she'll keep putting her hair and nails above her kids. If you really care about those kids, you'll back off and let their mother be the parent.
Yeah, but it's still not clear how "neglected" differs from your "personal standard of cleanliness".
You said "not clean would means suffering from neglect".
When I said "clean" in that post, it means her kids were being obviously being cared for. If I felt they were neglected, my description would go a lot deeper and more descriptive than "not clean."
I'm not sure if you're trying to be obtuse or honestly can't figure out the difference between "clean" and "neglected." But if you don't know what neglect is, google it. My personal opinion is irrelevant, but if someone is criminally neglecting their child then it is my place to say something.
Because the way people raise their children has an effect on the rest of Americas future. They can be raising thieves, racist, rapist, thugs, entrepreneurs, geniuses, presidents, or leeches. Their lack of involvement can shape the children to become a mass murderer and pull an Adam Lanza which affected all of America.
It's my business when they involve me in it or complain to me about their behavior. Everyone should care about how this new generation is being raised.
Bravo
I have never understood why people have children and then pay others to raise them. There is no sin in choosing to be childless.
I would mind my own business if they didn't always put me in it.
And this is city data forum.. you know... where you spend time commenting on other peoples business.
Well you failed to mention that in your OP, and frankly this scenario is sounding more and more implausible.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mjd07
In fairness, you wrote your original post and first few answers as if this was just a concern you had about some people you are friends with and happen to know their schedules.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnaNomus
Also, it would be helpful if you included all the information in the original post, instead of slowly dragging out more details. Originally, the story was the kids spend every weekend with grandparents and only a couple hours a night with parents, nothing about the kids having anger issues and what appears to be psychological problems and being abandoned for a hair appointment. Don't get mad at people responding to your original post when you didn't bother to include the full story.
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