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Why would you even consider bad-mouthing your husband?
He's 5. Just tell him Daddy had to work. Most parents have to work and can't make it to these things; it's not as if it's a pageant after school or something.
We don't have "normal" jobs. The kids know he isn't working and he doesn't have a job where he gets called in to an office. They know he goes back to work Sunday.
The school hosts a lunch for preK and K every year. The students sing a few songs and then have pizza with their families. It's not a moms club. It's not for moms who don't work (I work full time).
While k was in the shower, the two of them disagreed about something. Our son drew a picture and wrote "daddy I hate you". Obviously he doesn't hate his dad. And I've heard the I don't like you comments all the time. He's five. I tell him it's okay if he upset, I still love him. My husband can be moody and hold a grudge. Yes, he's being immature. All I'm asking if for a safe response for my kid that isn't a lie.
Come on. You are looking for a way to tell your kid what a bad person Daddy is. He might be an assclown, but it's up to you to make sure your kid doesn't begin to have disrespect for his father.
I would let Dad off the hook this one time. He is overreacting for certain, but it sounds as though he is stressed out because of his father.
Your son won't be the only child with just one parent present. Tell him his father had to do something for grandpa (even if it's just thinking about him). Your child will most likely not give it a second thought by tomorrow.
It wouldn't be a bad idea to let your son know that words like "I hate you" hurt grownups just like they hurt children, but I'd save that talk for another time.
No offense, but your husband is being less mature than a 5 year old. Kids sometimes tell their parents that they don't like them; that's just the way it is. Tell your husband to man up and deal with it.
Actually, this would be a good opportunity for him to turn it around. Have him ask your son if he wants him to attend the lunch. He will almost certainly say yes. Then, your husband can pretend to look surprised and say, "But wait, I thought you said you didn't like me. Are you SURE you want me to come to the lunch?" Your son will almost certainly say yes, and that'll be the end of it. And if by chance he does say no, then later on when he pouts that his dad didn't come, you can remind him that he (the son) asked him not to come, so it's on him. Hopefully, the cause-and-effect lesson will be learned.
Don't count on that as the end result. The dad is acting like a spoiled brat and even a kid knows that. Can you imagine if the kid would say no that's okey this idiot would probably deprive the kid a favored Xmas present. Was married to one of those whiney pouting types.
Have you tried calling your husband again and telling him "what if you died of a heart attack today, and the last thing your son remembers of you is the fight you had and that you wouldn't come to his lunch? Is that how you want your son to remember you when you're gone?"
Come on. You are looking for a way to tell your kid what a bad person Daddy is. He might be an assclown, but it's up to you to make sure your kid doesn't begin to have disrespect for his father.
This post is so so so important. Your husband is being a childish jerk, we all agree on that. However, you are trying to take out your frustrations on him by asking our permission to berate him to your child. Sorry, but that's pretty childish as well.
This post is so so so important. Your husband is being a childish jerk, we all agree on that. However, you are trying to take out your frustrations on him by asking our permission to berate him to your child. Sorry, but that's pretty childish as well.
No, she's not. She's dealing with a grieving spouse and trying to figure out how to shield her small children from the worst of it.
The Dad is for sure being a baby, but I also assume you told your son that it was a mean thing to do to write a hate picture to his Dad.
If my son did this about my wife I would sit down immediately with him and tell him to apologize and explain why it hurts. If my wife was pouting I would also sit down and tell her she is being a baby and acting like a pre-teen girl, holding a grudge over a childish comment.
Is this guy your childs step father as certainly doesnt act like the real dad. Sorry but your husband is an idiot. How small of him. I venture a guess he was looking for a way out as hes not man enough to eat in the cafeteria with the kids. As grandparents, both of us went to these events and the children were so proud we were there. Also saw a few children get anxious when parents running late. Am curious on why the dad has gotton more than one I dont like you or hate you notes. Dad doesnt seem to be creatiing any warm and fuzzy moments. Seems more like a bully to me. If anyone asks where dad is dont lie for him either just say he couldnt make it. Very dysfunctional stuff going on and not all can be blamed on your husbands dad about to die.
Last edited by luv my dayton; 11-06-2015 at 09:52 AM..
I'm not trying to make my husband look bad, I'm trying to avoid that!
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