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No reflection on anyone here but I am thinking about what a sad statement this is on our cultural views about womanhood. The beginning of menstruation should, in my opinion, be a cause for celebration and respect. It signals that a girl has entered the first phase of womanhood. Seems like we should have a special rite of passage for such a big event in a woman's life.
Guess we haven't made much progress in that area since I was a child. At least be sure to tell your daughters to counter-balance all the other nonsense.
I agree completely. I know many families who do treat it as such. But expecting preteens, who are not remotely emotionally mature to do the same is an exercise in disappointment.
I really like the reason "she has a doctor's excuse". Some kids might ask what the excuse is. Then, I think the white lie might be, "I couldn't understand the medical words, s/he just said to stay out of the pool this week." If you make up a lie about dry skin, or asthma attack, or something else, "what a tangled web we weave".
I would be worried that if she doesn't give a common reason that they and that small number of nosy and overreactive parents haven't heard of, they will make something up that is way worse. Asthma is common, boring, and many people only have one or two attacks in their entire life, myself included.
Converstation is simply:
Nosy kid: Why aren't you swimming?
OP Daughter: Doctor's note
Nosy kid: Whats wrong with you?
OP Daughter: Doctor thinks I might have had an asthma attack, so the chlorine stuff might be bad for me, until they know for sure.
Nosy kid: ::realizes they have heard of asthma but it isn't interesting moves on to other topics::
I had swimming class in junior high and high school, which was late 60s to early 70s. Anyone who wanted to be excused from gym or swimming had to take a note from home to the office in the morning. An attendance sheet would go out to all the teachers with the absences, early dismissals, and students excused from gym and swimming. It would listed a reason. There would be a long list of girls everyday with the letter "M" next to their name. I guess times have changed.
I guess so. I'm not seeing the reason for such a fuss.
Skipping pool class because of our periods was no big deal - we simply sat in our street clothes on the benches alongside the pool, told the gym teacher we had our period, and then either did our homework, chatted, or went into the gym to play volleyball or basketball while everyone else swam.
Nobody needed doctor's excuses, or even cared if we chose not to swim during our periods.
No reflection on anyone here but I am thinking about what a sad statement this is on our cultural views about womanhood. The beginning of menstruation should, in my opinion, be a cause for celebration and respect. It signals that a girl has entered the first phase of womanhood. Seems like we should have a special rite of passage for such a big event in a woman's life.
Guess we haven't made much progress in that area since I was a child. At least be sure to tell your daughters to counter-balance all the other nonsense.
What lkb0714 said. Probably the first time I've ever agreed with her! "(B)ut expecting preteens, who are not remotely emotionally mature to do the same is an exercise in disappointment."
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoCUBS1
She can tell classmates she has an ear infection. Appropriate use of a white lie.
A monthly ear infection? And kids with ear infections can usually swim unless they have tubes in their ears.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714
I would be worried that if she doesn't give a common reason that they and that small number of nosy and overreactive parents haven't heard of, they will make something up that is way worse. Asthma is common, boring, and many people only have one or two attacks in their entire life, myself included.
Converstation is simply:
Nosy kid: Why aren't you swimming?
OP Daughter: Doctor's note
Nosy kid: Whats wrong with you?
OP Daughter: Doctor thinks I might have had an asthma attack, so the chlorine stuff might be bad for me, until they know for sure.
Nosy kid: ::realizes they have heard of asthma but it isn't interesting moves on to other topics::
Again, a kid with no history of asthma before, now gets a potential asthma attack once a month?
What lkb0714 said. Probably the first time I've ever agreed with her! "(B)ut expecting preteens, who are not remotely emotionally mature to do the same is an exercise in disappointment."
A monthly ear infection? And kids with ear infections can usually swim unless they have tubes in their ears.
Again, a kid with no history of asthma before, now gets a potential asthma attack once a month?
I had assumed that the swimming was a month or so long winter sport session like pickleball, volleyball, square dancing, etc like the schools I have taught in. Most of the schools in the NE do not have their own pools so it became a temporary unit to make sure kids can swim, and to give them something to do in the winter. We were bused over to the local pool. Maybe this is a regional thing?
OP can you clarify, do kids swim all year long?
Anyway, I think if the kid sets it up once, all she has to say is doctors note again, I don't think it is likely that anyone is tracking which days she is swimming and which she isn't.
Why does she have to tell anyone anything. A medical excuse to the teacher is enough. I wouldn't let my daughter get worried about this, it isn't anyone's business.
But, will she be missing swimming for a week every month? That may make things more obvious.
I wonder if there is an alternative to tampons these days?
A monthly ear infection? And kids with ear infections can usually swim unless they have tubes in their ears.
?
Classmates will not keep track of all that. They won't care - more important distractions out there. If anyone asks, just state "ear problem is acting up." Classmates are extremely unlikely to ask follow-up questions, or care to hear about the medical details. I was on the swim team and developed "swimmers ear" problems, so any ear problem is a pretty believable excuse IMO.
Also, swimming unit is only limited duration, so may not be too many weeks of "ear infections."
Ive never heard of a school having swimming in PE all year round. So I assumed it was like my school (which had a pool) and would have swim weeks here and there through the year.
In that case, eczema, dry skin, ear infection are all easy ways of explaining why they cant swim. I have dry skin and if its bad, I avoid chlorine. No one can look at me and tell my skin is super dry.
Anything else, like a skin infection could be teased or be told the girl is gross.
As for celebrating menstruation...all fine and good at home (if you are inclined) but around other girls and boys their age...really? Who wants to talk about menses with other people they don't feel close to? I don't have any shame about my period but I still wouldn't be chatting with male colleagues (or female if I didn't have a closer bond with them). Just because you think something is private, doesn't mean you think it is shameful. And adding in talking, for me, about my misplaced cervix...no thanks.
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