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No way of knowing. But if she just sits around on her phone all the time and eats wherever she goes, wherever she wants, then she will certainly get bigger.
As a nation we stopped eating fats and started eating high sugar foods and drinks. It may well be that fats were never the problem, sugar is the problem.
Let your kids eat all they want of fruit, vegetables, and fats. Fat is where we get our energy from. We have had it backwards for years getting low fat foods that are high in sugar or fructose.
No breads, no sugars. Only drink water. I would not buy any baked goods including bread anymore. I would not buy flour tortillas and stick to corn tortillas. I would not buy any ready made foods. As a parent I would not buy any drinks, fruit juices, soda, alcohol, or anything other than plain old water. No flavored mix for water either. Just have them drink water. No boxed cereal. Let them eat Oat meal for cereal. You want to eliminate as many carbs as you can.
You might not be able to control what happens outside of your home. You can control what happens inside your home. On top of the diet change I would get my kids, at least your daughter into a gym or some extra curricular activity that she can run off the weight. Maybe go to the gym with her. An hour a day on the cardio and after she drops the weight she can drop down to a half hour a day.
Very frustrating. My 14 year old daughter is nearing 200 pounds, is going to enter high school in the fall and as of now, does not fit into the school uniform( khaki pants, button down shirt, sweater vest). My son put on 30 pounds this past school year, his freshman year of college. My husband and I are trying everything but they refuse to diet with us or work out, they don't seem to care. For instance, when my daughter goes out with friends, I KNOW she'll ignore what her dad & I say, eat junk.
Our discussions with them are jokes to them and its funny to them that the other has a weight issue. They don't seem to connect that the reason they're winded so easily and why they hate stairs, is connected with weight.
My daughter is definitely the harder to deal with.
How can she eat junk going out with her friends? Where does she get the money? How did she get to be 200 lbs., and why did you wait until now to discuss healthy eating, exercise, and all that, with her?
How have you raised your kids? Have you bought them sweet drinks (carbonated, or Kool-Aid, or what4ever), and fed them a lot of starches and empty calories? (Bread, potatoes, corn, starchy casseroles) Have you given the kids sweet treats? (desserts, kept bags of cookies in the house, chips, sweet rolls or pop tarts for breakfast or weekend breakfasts as a treat)
As a nation we stopped eating fats and started eating high sugar foods and drinks. It may well be that fats were never the problem, sugar is the problem.
Let your kids eat all they want of fruit, vegetables, and fats. Fat is where we get our energy from. We have had it backwards for years getting low fat foods that are high in sugar or fructose.
No breads, no sugars. Only drink water. I would not buy any baked goods including bread anymore. I would not buy flour tortillas and stick to corn tortillas. I would not buy any ready made foods. As a parent I would not buy any drinks, fruit juices, soda, alcohol, or anything other than plain old water. No flavored mix for water either. Just have them drink water. No boxed cereal. Let them eat Oat meal for cereal. You want to eliminate as many carbs as you can.
You might not be able to control what happens outside of your home. You can control what happens inside your home. On top of the diet change I would get my kids, at least your daughter into a gym or some extra curricular activity that she can run off the weight. Maybe go to the gym with her. An hour a day on the cardio and after she drops the weight she can drop down to a half hour a day.
Or walking with the daughter 1/2 hr./day after school or after dinner would help a lot. If the gym seems too boring for her, she could join one with a pool, and swim laps.
we've tried cutting her off. but, she just gets a friend to buy junk for her
This is the behavior of an addict. This is what alcoholics do.
Are there any psychological issues present? Does she eat to compensate for a lack of emotional support and love? What was your and your husband's relationship with her like in the first 5 years of her life? And the next 5?
Not one time have you mentioned that you're concerned about her health or her self esteem. You have however mentioned her clothing size, her weight, her "ideal" weight, her soon to be ranking in the fat friend group, etc.
You are not mentally well. You can't expect her to get a grip on reality when you're unable to. Here's the reality
1- you caused this mess and you owe her an apology for the state she's in.
2- all those times when she was younger and dying for parents who would play with her and ride bikes, etc you guys were too addicted to food to be able to participate. Now you shame her for being lazy? How many times did she ask you to play, run, bike, etc and you shooed her off?
3- It's great that you changed but you basically turned your house into a drug den with food being the DOC. Now that you get clean, you're shaming her into it even though you're the one who got her hooked.
4- You give the impression that you're embarrassed by her weight. Well, let me tell you, no one likes having the fat parents, either.
5- she doesn't get fat overnight but now that you're not in your sugar haze it's a huge deal now? If I was her, I'd think that you think you are better than me now that you have stuck to a diet for a whopping 6 months.
ice cream, popcorn, and chips for cheat days. Usually we have chicken, fruit, veggies
Those are highly addictive munchies. It's too easy to eat a half bag in one sitting. All of you will have to break yourselves of the habit. Just stop buying that stuff. If you over-eat ice cream the same way, it will have to go, as well.
The reason your daughter treats your conversations about dieting like a joke is that you've spent too many years giving in to her demands. She's learned not to take you seriously. You taught her that.
In view of this, I tend to agree with the poster who recommended you and your husband take a parenting course, so that you can learn how to reclaim your authority, and introduce discipline into the family dynamic. These are skills that need to be learned. The single moms I know who took a course like that, to get control of a household of undisciplined teens said the course was incredibly helpful. No more fights and arguments!
Send her to the fat farm. The people in those places know what they're doing. Your son needs to go too. If you and your husband are overweight, make it a family outing. When you're talking about the fat farm, call it the fat farm—don't use some syrupy euphemism. If you can embarrass her, you win. When you win., she wins.
Obesity is not a laughing matter. It can kill you.
Send her to the fat farm. The people in those places know what they're doing. Your son needs to go too. If you and your husband are overweight, make it a family outing. When you're talking about the fat farm, call it the fat farm—don't use some syrupy euphemism. If you can embarrass her, you win. When you win., she wins.
Obesity is not a laughing matter. It can kill you.
Yeah, let's humiliate her for having a bad example for 14 years.
Have you ever heard of the term "focus patient"?
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