Three Year Old Boy Locked Outside - Time Out (out of control, booster seat, playing)

[tangelag]

Originally Posted by glamatomic

...and as I said before, the OP is only assuming this is Time Out and the mother is purposely putting him out there.

He could be getting out himself and not being able to get back in or his older sibling could be locking him out. We don't know for sure that the mother is purposely doing this as punishment.

We don’t know that she is not... Poor baby. Maybe he got fingerprints on the stainless...?

[coschristi]

Originally Posted by Dragonmam

I have seen and helped teenagers (16 and 17) locked out because they missed curfew and it destroyed them emotionally. Whatever connection the parent thought would be made between the rule violation and the consequence was absolutely overshadowed by the feeling that they were abandoned. It really made them question whether the parent loved them.

It destroyed them emotionally?

My mom did that to me a few times. Of course, my parents had gotten to the point where they didn’t bother to call the Missing Children’s hotline to report me “found” anymore.

Because I didn’t stay that way for long. And no; I wasn’t being abused, neglected or anything else that would have rendered me a victim ... I was just an uncontrollable kid.

I remember one time I was supposed to be home by 11pm & I did really good all night long keeping track of the time. I was pretty impressed with myself & left where I had been in time to make it home. As I cut through this huge park, getting about 1/4 of the way across ... I heard “IT”.

The dreaded gurgle & hiss of the automatic sprinklers coming on ... Despite my running like heck; I was soaked to the bone & was forced over a mile out of my way. And made it home 12 minutes late. To a locked house. I tried to beg & plead to no avail.

So, I & my two friends who had walked me home, just decided to walk all the way back to a block away from where we had started ... to go to Dunkin Doughnuts. We just hung out & drank coffee refills all night while trying to figure out how to fit our hands inside the cigarette vending machine to snag a pack. It wasn’t awesome but it was far from devastating.

I would have questioned my parents love if they hadn’t tried everything in their power, to ... well; parent me. I’ll bet it was more emotionally destructive for them than it was for me.

[Sollaces]

Originally Posted by AnotherTouchOfWhimsy

I'm not sure how the fact that they're white and have stainless steel appliances figures into this at all. You know that child abuse isn't something that only happens in non-white families who have white refrigerators and cream-colored dishwashers, right?

Sorry, I was just giving details for those that needed them.
The comment on the appliances... Well, when a house is 4 years old and completely switching out perfectly good appliances so they all match? That completely describes the mom in my book.

Thanks everyone. I'll keep my eye and ear out. It helps to share.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by coschristi

It destroyed them emotionally?

My mom did that to me a few times. Of course, my parents had gotten to the point where they didn’t bother to call the Missing Children’s hotline to report me “found” anymore.

Because I didn’t stay that way for long. And no; I wasn’t being abused, neglected or anything else that would have rendered me a victim ... I was just an uncontrollable kid.

I remember one time I was supposed to be home by 11pm & I did really good all night long keeping track of the time. I was pretty impressed with myself & left where I had been in time to make it home. As I cut through this huge park, getting about 1/4 of the way across ... I heard “IT”.

The dreaded gurgle & hiss of the automatic sprinklers coming on ... Despite my running like heck; I was soaked to the bone & was forced over a mile out of my way. And made it home 12 minutes late. To a locked house. I tried to beg & plead to no avail.

So, I & my two friends who had walked me home, just decided to walk all the way back to a block away from where we had started ... to go to Dunkin Doughnuts. We just hung out & drank coffee refills all night while trying to figure out how to fit our hands inside the cigarette vending machine to snag a pack. It wasn’t awesome but it was far from devastating.

I would have questioned my parents love if they hadn’t tried everything in their power, to ... well; parent me. I’ll bet it was more emotionally destructive for them than it was for me.

Do you see the difference in your story? You and your friends (who inexplicably decided not to go home that night the night you were kicked out for being 12 minutes late) made a party of it.

How would you have felt if it was just you? If you didn't have friends who tried to make a party out of a harsh punishment?

[Kibbiekat]

Originally Posted by cheezball

I would go over while the child is still locked out, and knock on the front door. Just voice the concern the child has been outside for a few mins trying to get in. Don't qualify with any preconceived notions of what you think is happening, and listen to see if she will explain herself.

I would do this. Maybe she's feeding or changing the twins, and a sibling keeps locking the child out. She could be in another room and not even know. If she really is doing it as a punishment, she might think twice if she realizes you know.

[janet bubby]

Originally Posted by glamatomic

...and as I said before, the OP is only assuming this is Time Out and the mother is purposely putting him out there.

He could be getting out himself and not being able to get back in or his older sibling could be locking him out. We don't know for sure that the mother is purposely doing this as punishment.

This... I am taken aback at the number who are so surprised and outraged at the child being alone outside to begin with. In my old neighborhood they began running the neighborhood unsupervised by age 3 at the latest , sometimes as early as 2. Screaming at the top of their lungs was just part of the play routine.

[glamatomic]

Originally Posted by janet bubby

This... I am taken aback at the number who are so surprised and outraged at the child being alone outside to begin with. In my old neighborhood they began running the neighborhood unsupervised by age 3 at the latest , sometimes as early as 2. Screaming at the top of their lungs was just part of the play routine.

My children would absolutely be running the neighborhood if I let them, lol.

As for screaming, depending on the child that is just part of childhood. My 3 year old was screaming, wailing and crying on the front porch today as if he was seriously hurt (we were all getting in the car to go out)... all because he wanted the Blue Jacket (which was dirty) and not the Black Jacket . I can imagine a passerby thinking there was something really wrong the way he was carrying on. By the time we got to the park he was right as rain.

Originally Posted by tangelag

We don’t know that she is not... Poor baby. Maybe he got fingerprints on the stainless...?

You are correct. We don't know either way. But until the OP has more information, it is premature to villify the mother.

[glamatomic]

Originally Posted by Kibbiekat

I would do this. Maybe she's feeding or changing the twins, and a sibling keeps locking the child out. She could be in another room and not even know. If she really is doing it as a punishment, she might think twice if she realizes you know.

I agree with all of this.

[stan4]

Tape it.

Call CPS.

This is not normal. It's cruel and effed up.

[brightdoglover]

Maybe the mother is putting him outside to quell her own frustrated desire to hit him or otherwise hurt him. She can't leave the house to calm down, so she puts him outside. Not saying it's great but it's better than physically striking him.