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- I'm not married and I know most of you here are married. But I have a question for you guys : "What is your ideal parent?"
- My ideal parent is someone who is not very strict, a little aggressive, caring, thoughtful, generous, romantic, funny, kind and does not nag whenever I come home late
Yes, I'm a parent of three and if there's one thing I've learned is there isn't a "ideal" parent. I mean Ideal would be subjective based on what you independantly valued.
Most parent's would tell you....assuming their raising their own children. That you have your good and bad days. This goes for parents, and the kids. Somedays are perfect, no fighting, screaming, yelling, whining, etc. Then there are days when you as a parent need a time out and would just like to cry uncle.
Ideal? A parent with no temper at all. The kind that doesn't feel an inner explosion when that 5th cup of milk gets spilled in the same day, after the dog puked on the carpet, the husband has been working late all week and spends the time he is home watching football. You know, the kind of parent I'm not! lol
To me, ideal would be supportive, nurturing and attentive (balanced), setting responsible boundaries and unconditionally loving. 'Supportive' does not mean saying "yes" to everything (including coming home late). Also providing encouragement and a balanced focus on the child's individual development.
What is NOT ideal is: being critical, too much vicarious living through the kid without having his/her own identity, being overly absorbed with achievement for the parent's own ego needs, punitive (by this I mean the opposite of unconditionally loving) and of course, being apathetic and neglectful.
I think the ideal parent is some one who loves their children unconditionally, takes the time to be in their life and teach them as much about the world as they can so they can be responsible well rounded adults. I also think the ideal parent is not afraid to be the bad guy. It's not fun playing the villan sometimes, but in the end parents who always want to be the good guy and give into their childs every whim are doing their children more harm than good.
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