Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 06-30-2009, 12:19 PM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
8,998 posts, read 14,785,443 times
Reputation: 3550

Advertisements

What is an age you would be comfortable with your kids playing outside by themselves with hardly any supervision?

Here is why I ask:

My parents never really had to worry about me spending a lot of time outside because I'm not an outside kind of girl. I had my little phases where I couldn't get enough of it. However, they were home 99.9% of the time when I was outside playing with friends or by myself. The one time I played outside and they were gone, I had a key to the house and I was already staying home by myself at the age of around 10 or 11.

In any case, a few minutes ago some kid says to my mom, "I really have to go and I don't think I can make it home. Can I use your bathroom?" He looks like he was around the age of 9-11. My mom lets him in and he goes into my bathroom. I start walking in the hallway where my bathroom and room are and I start smelling ****. Ugh. So he finally gets done doing his business and he asks, "Do you have a playstation?" I lied and said no. I let him out to the garage and he asks if he can play with one of our basketballs, if that's my bike hanging in the garage and that he wants me to "come play a little game with him". I told him no and that he needed to start heading home. "I don't head home til dark." WTF? It's 1 in the afternoon and it doesn't get dark in Arkansas til around...eh...6:30...7 maybe. The whole time I'm thinking, "When does he eat? Where are his parents and why do they let him stay out all day???" He is still hanging around and I finally say, "Well...we're about to have company so you need to head home." He replies, "I don't head home til dark." "Well....you need to go away from here." "All right," he says in a sarcastic tone, "Tell me when your little sister comes over." How about not? I have a little 8 year old step sis that comes over in the summer and there's no way in hell I'm letting him come around her. He gave me the creeps.

It's a good thing that he came to our house because we have a sex offender who lives not too far (less than a mile) and he could have made the mistake of going there. Ugh.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-30-2009, 09:30 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,711 posts, read 13,476,501 times
Reputation: 4185
Sounds like he was bored and looking for something to do. What about him would give you the creeps?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 01:28 AM
 
54 posts, read 66,537 times
Reputation: 22
I used to play outside like around the neighborhood and away from the house at about 10 years old.
I usually had my brother with me but he was 5 years younger.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 03:38 AM
 
Location: Ohio
2,175 posts, read 9,169,437 times
Reputation: 3962
I played outside without much supervision about 57 years ago when I was only five. But I had learned to stay in the yard and there where no pedophiles around. In fact there wasn't much of anybody around. Except for my dog.
Mom or Dad looked out the window once in awhile to check on me. But I wasn't constantly watched.
Sadly, those days are gone.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 05:42 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
1,820 posts, read 4,492,084 times
Reputation: 1929
Those days are definitely gone unfortunately. Even 35 years ago,I use to be able to play outside with my friends,ride my bike around the neighborhood,etc... today,you can't let them outside without being supervised.
I don't let my children outside if I can't be out there with them, somedays it is fine and others,I just don't want to be outside for 4 hours hanging around. It is terrible that we have to constantly worry about what might happen,but it is part of our world today.
My children are young (3 & 7) so obviously I wouldn't allow my 3yr old out alone anyway's,regardless.
I am not sure at what age they will be allowed to play unsupervised...
I think that 10 or 11 I will have to let go of my "strings" and let them ride their bikes around w/out myself or my husband,but even that will be hard....
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 06:20 AM
 
11,642 posts, read 23,904,587 times
Reputation: 12274
Quote:
Originally Posted by Robhu View Post
I played outside without much supervision about 57 years ago when I was only five. But I had learned to stay in the yard and there where no pedophiles around. In fact there wasn't much of anybody around. Except for my dog.
Mom or Dad looked out the window once in awhile to check on me. But I wasn't constantly watched.
Sadly, those days are gone.
Here's the thing. There WERE pedophiles around. It's just that nobody knew who they were or where they lived.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 06:22 AM
 
11,642 posts, read 23,904,587 times
Reputation: 12274
My kids are allowed to play outside with minimal supervision. They are 15, 13, 10. My 10 year old usually goes out with his brothers so I don't worry about him as much as I worried about the younger ones when they were smaller. Even though I let them play outdoors I don't let them just wander. They have to keep in touch with me when they go somewhere and they can't just disappear for hours at a time. My older 2 have phones and I expect them to use them to keep in touch.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 06:32 AM
 
Location: Orlando
8,176 posts, read 18,534,548 times
Reputation: 49864
I think he sounds like a lonely little boy.

Mine are grown (26&27) but they played outside all the time.

I can't really say unsupervised because I was lucky enough to live in an area with lots of kids and everyone watched out for each other.

I say it's up to your neighborhood.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 07:11 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, Texas
1,691 posts, read 3,850,740 times
Reputation: 4123
he may have been a latch key kid ( do they still use that term?- latch key?) Anyways, things are so much different now a days and in someways not. his parent or parents might not be aware of the sex offender in the area, I know a few of my neighbors with kids are not aware either. I had to tell a new neighbor that they shared a fence with an offender, they were shocked! I asked, "didn't you check before you bought the house?" they said no they thought that would have been disclosed in the buying process. OMG! You disclose damages, deaths etc. Not who or what your neighbors are known to be.

I grew up with a line about 5 foot from the end of the driveway/street. I was NOT allowed to cross that line in any form not even in the front yard ( it was invisble for the yard but it was still there). It wasn't till I was about 12 or more that I was allowed past that line and to visit my friend down the street. And even then I was on a strick time table.

todays homes leave little room for kids to play in especially the yards. I hate kids and parents that think it is their 'right' to play in the streets and other people's yards. Kids have damaged my parents rock wall by using it as a bike jump. some parents have no respect for thier own property let alone teach their kids to respect someone elses property.

I would say you have the right to disallow this kid "who has no appearent respect" for your authority to play with your younger sister. i do believe he is bored and just trying to drum up something to do and someone one to be with. It might be good to talk with his parents about his behavior or someone in the area who could play devils advocate, so to speak. He most likely just needs a good playmate but can't find one and apparently his parents just don't care.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2009, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,644,789 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by PurpleLove08 View Post
What is an age you would be comfortable with your kids playing outside by themselves with hardly any supervision?

Here is why I ask:

My parents never really had to worry about me spending a lot of time outside because I'm not an outside kind of girl. I had my little phases where I couldn't get enough of it. However, they were home 99.9% of the time when I was outside playing with friends or by myself. The one time I played outside and they were gone, I had a key to the house and I was already staying home by myself at the age of around 10 or 11.

In any case, a few minutes ago some kid says to my mom, "I really have to go and I don't think I can make it home. Can I use your bathroom?" He looks like he was around the age of 9-11. My mom lets him in and he goes into my bathroom. I start walking in the hallway where my bathroom and room are and I start smelling ****. Ugh. So he finally gets done doing his business and he asks, "Do you have a playstation?" I lied and said no. I let him out to the garage and he asks if he can play with one of our basketballs, if that's my bike hanging in the garage and that he wants me to "come play a little game with him". I told him no and that he needed to start heading home. "I don't head home til dark." WTF? It's 1 in the afternoon and it doesn't get dark in Arkansas til around...eh...6:30...7 maybe. The whole time I'm thinking, "When does he eat? Where are his parents and why do they let him stay out all day???" He is still hanging around and I finally say, "Well...we're about to have company so you need to head home." He replies, "I don't head home til dark." "Well....you need to go away from here." "All right," he says in a sarcastic tone, "Tell me when your little sister comes over." How about not? I have a little 8 year old step sis that comes over in the summer and there's no way in hell I'm letting him come around her. He gave me the creeps.

It's a good thing that he came to our house because we have a sex offender who lives not too far (less than a mile) and he could have made the mistake of going there. Ugh.
Has anyone in the neighborhood paid a visit to the sex offender and let him know what the consequences of any problem would be?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top