Should I let my gay son sleep over at his gay friends house? (activity, adult)

[GoodSchoolols]

I don't know why parents get so hung up on their kids being sexually active. I want my kids to have a normal life, and that includes sex.

[G-fused]

Originally Posted by overworked_mom

I belive my son when he says that he and the other boy are just friends

I didn't read beyond page 1.

I say no and am completely flabbergasted at your naiveté. That’s nothing to say about your son’s character but come on! Weren’t you ever 17!? I know what it’s like to be a 17 yr old boy and that’s pretty much all I need to know. Believe me OP. Even if he means it when he says it to you, it’ll be different when the lights are off and you’re not around. Fool around as normal other 17 yr olds do but a sleep over? Don’t think so.

And what 17 yr old has a sleep over anyway? That’s like a 10 – 13 yr old thing isn’t it?

[OptimusPrime69]

Originally Posted by G-fused

I didn't read beyond page 1.

I say no and am completely flabbergasted at your naiveté. That’s nothing to say about your son’s character but come on! Weren’t you ever 17!? I know what it’s like to be a 17 yr old boy and that’s pretty much all I need to know. Believe me OP. Even if he means it when he says it to you, it’ll be different when the lights are off and you’re not around. Fool around as normal other 17 yr olds do but a sleep over? Don’t think so.

And what 17 yr old has a sleep over anyway? That’s like a 10 – 13 yr old thing isn’t it?

I'm a male and was 17 once.
I slept over friends houses all the time and they slept over mine.
Sometimes, we'd be playing video games or watching some game and it got late, so instead of driving home or having parents come pick them up...they would simply sleep over..... Happened literally all the time.

OP, I say let him sleep over. I think LGBT kids need as many friends and allies and support as they can get. Are they going to be sexual? It's a possibility, but they could also all just be friends and are able to talk about their lives being gay teens and relate to eachother, which I think is important. ... If u say no, the outcome will not benefit u or your son..... Let him be who he was meant to be. All you can do is guide him and love him and support him as best u can. You can't prevent him from having sex by denying him a sleepover. . . if that's his prerogative than he'll find another way to get it. ... Trust him, and let him have his gay friends. No harm in that

[G-fused]

Originally Posted by OptimusPrime69

I'm a male and was 17 once.
I slept over friends houses all the time and they slept over mine.
Sometimes, we'd be playing video games or watching some game and it got late, so instead of driving home or having parents come pick them up...they would simply sleep over..... Happened literally all the time.

Crashing at someone's place because it's too late (or a multitude of other reasons) is very different from a planned slumber party.

I'm sure there are some 17 yr olds who did sleep overs but sleep overs are mostly for 12 yr olds who request having their friends sleep over for their birthdays or something.

[Just A Guy]

This is definitely and interesting question to ponder.

Most parents would probably be fine with 17 year old heterosexual boys or girls sleeping at a same-sex friend's house in the same room together.

Most parents probably wouldn't be OK with that same boy or girl sleeping at an opposite sex friend's house.

Homosexual friend sleeping at another same sex friend with the same sexual orientation? Hmmm...I don't know what most parents would think about this one.

[denverian]

I'm a gay man. I don't recall if I spent the night at a male friend's house at age 17, but did many times from around 14 - 16. Just because all the boys are gay doesn't mean that they're attracted to one another and going to have sex. "Friends", gay or straight, were friends, and I had no attraction to them and would have been grossed out by the thought of sex with them.

I can also remember going camping with 4 gay friends at age 22 or so. There was NO SEX because we were all just friends. Gay men don't want to have sex with every other male on the planet If the parent were involved in the gay son's life enough and saw how he acted around the friends, they'd probably know that the relationship was or wasn't "romantic".

[just1paul]

Originally Posted by denverian

I'm a gay man. I don't recall if I spent the night at a male friend's house at age 17, but did many times from around 14 - 16. Just because all the boys are gay doesn't mean that they're attracted to one another and going to have sex. "Friends", gay or straight, were friends, and I had no attraction to them and would have been grossed out by the thought of sex with them.

I can also remember going camping with 4 gay friends at age 22 or so. There was NO SEX because we were all just friends. Gay men don't want to have sex with every other male on the planet If the parent were involved in the gay son's life enough and saw how he acted around the friends, they'd probably know that the relationship was or wasn't "romantic".

Amen to this. Spot on.

[purehuman]

Originally Posted by overworked_mom

Recently my gay 17 year old asked me if he could spend the night at his friends house. I know that the other boy is gay but my son tells me they are just friends and two other boys (also gay) will be there as well. I just don't know how I feel about this any advice?

If he's still asking for your permission (at 17), I'd say you got nothing to worry about mom.

[ipaper]

The boy at question in this thread is probably 23 or 24 now, and can make his own choices in life. Since this thread started back in 2009, it would be nice to hear from the op to see how life is going for her son.

[HighFlyingBird]

Isn't this a thread started in 2009? Meaning the kids is a full adult now and I am sure he sleeps over where he wants to