Making friends in Lancaster... (Pittsburgh, Harrisburg: transplants, crime, home)

[BrownEyes82]

Mod note: This thread was started in 2007 and the OP has not posted anywhere on city-data since that date.

I'm new to the area. I moved here about 6 months ago from Virginia and I'm having a hard time meeting and making friends in the area. I'm not interested in the bar scene and I don't wish to join a church. So far I've only gotten to know my coworkers and even things haven't gone very far with them. I've read similar threads on here about this.

Anybody else having or had the same difficulties? Any suggestions?

[lititzman2003]

You may want to participate in local activities, such as community watch, block parties, parades, etc. You may also want to consider getting involved in any organization that strives to improve the quality of life in the county. The locals will see that and realize you're not trying to change their way of life here. Too often "outsiders" are accused of bringing crime and other bad elements into the county.The only way to meet new people is by being around those who have the same common interests as you. Be patient; it may take a LONG time until you're accepted. Good luck.

[astrogal]

When I was down there I had the same problem, as does everyone, so try not to take it personally. Find something, ANYTHING to do that is local and join. Even then it can be hard or you may find yourself having to travel....especially if you don't do church or don't have any kids. But the one thing I did find out is that you are judged by how you are contributing to the community. That's really big.

Don't write off the bar scene....find one with a restaurant and make yourself a regular for coffee. Keep smiling, keep saying hello, sooner or later someone will crack.

[sheelerbl]

I'm also looking to make friends in Lancaster..

[boney89]

Originally Posted by BrownEyes82

I'm new to the area. I moved here about 6 months ago from Virginia and I'm having a hard time meeting and making friends in the area. I'm not interested in the bar scene and I don't wish to join a church. So far I've only gotten to know my coworkers and even things haven't gone very far with them. I've read similar threads on here about this.

Anybody else having or had the same difficulties? Any suggestions?

Pennsylvania beside philly and pburg is not really too social state im live 6 years in poconos and wasnt easy hookup with somebody just luck.thats it

[teachbeach]

I would try meet up groups~they are often welcoming and you click or bond with a common interest; books, biking, hiking, crafts etc.

[Pilot1]

I've lived in many parts of the country, and in PA, the Philly burbs, Harrisburg, and Lancaster. In general, I found Lancaster to be the most unfriendly, provincial, and uncaring place. If you don't have a German last name, and are not from there originally, they look at you like you have three heads. No thanks.

[Beretta]

Originally Posted by Pilot1

I've lived in many parts of the country, and in PA, the Philly burbs, Harrisburg, and Lancaster. In general, I found Lancaster to be the most unfriendly, provincial, and uncaring place. If you don't have a German last name, and are not from there originally, they look at you like you have three heads. No thanks.

This is a very true statement. I also lived in Pittsburgh as well as Lancaster and I can attest to what was written. I was recruited to Lancaster for a job and was a little leery of what I had heard. We went out of our way to buy a home in a transplant friendly neighborhood which was our only saving grace. Perhaps it is because I am originally from the South; but I have lived all over, traveled extensively domestically and abroad. Lancaster definitely is one of the weirdest, provincial and supercilious places.

To anyone reading this in the future wondering about fitting in or making friends: it isn't you - it's Lancaster. Either don't come/go there or get out as fast as you can.

Yes, we enjoyed certain parts and made some friends (almost all transplants like ourselves), but this is my warning.

[sedimenjerry]

Originally Posted by Pilot1

I've lived in many parts of the country, and in PA, the Philly burbs, Harrisburg, and Lancaster. In general, I found Lancaster to be the most unfriendly, provincial, and uncaring place. If you don't have a German last name, and are not from there originally, they look at you like you have three heads. No thanks.

YES
I was so happy to leave once I was done with grad school. I at least had some good friends from there but that was from university connections.
Daily life was similar. Outside of the city, people were incredibly insular. Customer service was poor to mediocre. Every once in a while I'd actually come across someone who at least appeared to be happy to serve you and willing to help you with whatever but it was more an exception than the rule.
Returning home to Atlanta was like a breath of fresh air with the friendliness and helpfulness. I've since moved to Houston and I'm blown away by how friendly everyone is. It's not like everyone is stopped in the aisle of the grocery store having conversations but people are more mindful and don't run you over. It's not the "me first" attitude I encountered in Lancaster county.

[caco54]

Moved to the general area 25 years ago and we are still considered the new people. Current residents go back 5 generations and are still hanging with their high school friends and 100's of cousins. They don't need or look for new friends. Sorry.