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I don't know if it is the correct forum for this, but it was the closest fit.
I have gotten a lot of heat after inheriting money from my late mother's estate from family, friends, really anyone who knows that it has happened (my little sister basically told everyone), about what to do/not to do with it. I am in no hurry to dispose of this money but it seems that everyone wants to give advice or caution.
This generally comes in two factions-- the Savers and Spenders. Both exert pressure that I should choose to be in their "camp" and judgment if I express a differing opinion.
Let's start with the savers. I am moving for work. The savers I know are already chiding me not to use any of my funds on the move ("Wasteful"), that I should buy a house as soon as I get to where I am going ("Renting is lining the landlord's pockets") and put the rest away for retirement in various different investments ("Don't TOUCH this money until you are 65.") I was talking to a friend in this camp and said I wanted to buy myself a particular piece of moderately expensive jewelry. I went through a lot with my mom's illness and death and thought it would be nice to do something for myself. This conversation devolved into a lecture about how I was "frivolously spending money" and various ways I should basically hoard this income until I get old enough to "know how to use it." I did not ask for these opinions and have every penny that has been distributed to me of my mom's funds thus far.
Then there are the "Spenders" , those who say "What? You got that much money? GO ON VACATION! QUIT YOUR JOB!" I didn't inherit enough to stop working entirely, and right now its not a great idea for me to take time off without some clear plan. I make a good income and have no intention of just sitting around at home. These individuals seem utterly confused as to why I am not out living it up and throwing wads of cash around and make comments like "Well, if I had that much money, this is what I would do..."
I wonder the following--
1. Do Savers ever get to the day when they feel like its okay to spend their money? I know that retirement is a big deal for many people, but I am in my 30s and don't expect to retire in a traditional way. We are already being told at work that "phased retirement" is what we will experience-- working part time or from home for longer than the usual cut off. Pensions aren't available. Retirement will not be the same animal. It seems that Savers will only spend on buying a house or retiring. I have one friend in this group who refuses to purchase new bedroom furniture because its a "waste" but is adamant about retirement contributions.
2. Do Spenders actually understand or care about how much things cost? Credit card debt seems not to phase this group, nor does buying a 60k car on an income of 50k.
1. Do Savers ever get to the day when they feel like its okay to spend their money?
Of course they do. Well, most do.
But as savers their choices will tend to be of the practical sort.
And even when an indulgence it'll be the less flamboyant ones.
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2. Do Spenders actually understand or care about how much things cost?
Some really do understand it all and still deliberately choose to "live for today".
These are the exception. Most avoid seeking or listening to prudent caution.
1. Do Savers ever get to the day when they feel like its okay to spend their money? I know that retirement is a big deal for many people, but I am in my 30s and don't expect to retire in a traditional way. We are already being told at work that "phased retirement" is what we will experience-- working part time or from home for longer than the usual cut off. Pensions aren't available. Retirement will not be the same animal. It seems that Savers will only spend on buying a house or retiring. I have one friend in this group who refuses to purchase new bedroom furniture because its a "waste" but is adamant about retirement contributions.
You have NO idea of what the next thirty years will bring - good, bad or ugly. Thirty years ago, I was trapped in a low paying management job working a ton of hours, etc. The recession on the early Eighties actually had HIGHER rates on employment than the current one. (Interest rates were 17%+ at one point).
I took much of my savings and received a meaningful degree. This allowed me to pursue a career in a higher paying industry and advancement opportunities. Then, I sent my wife to graduate school so she could qualify for a better paying job.
I do NOT mind spending money on quality furniture. Most of mine is Amish made, many years old, and was expensive. None of that IKEA or Sauder knock-down junk.
Also, for many, retirement is not optional. I have several friends - many who would appear healthy - who have MS, dementia, etc. - who are not working in their 50s.
You have NO idea of what the next thirty years will bring - good, bad or ugly. Thirty years ago, I was trapped in a low paying management job working a ton of hours, etc. The recession on the early Eighties actually had HIGHER rates on employment than the current one. (Interest rates were 17%+ at one point).
I took much of my savings and received a meaningful degree. This allowed me to pursue a career in a higher paying industry and advancement opportunities. Then, I sent my wife to graduate school so she could qualify for a better paying job.
I do NOT mind spending money on quality furniture. Most of mine is Amish made, many years old, and was expensive. None of that IKEA or Sauder knock-down junk.
Also, for many, retirement is not optional. I have several friends - many who would appear healthy - who have MS, dementia, etc. - who are not working in their 50s.
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Disability retirement is a different situation.
I am in my 30s as well and I don't understand why Baby Boomers can't get that retirement will be different for Gen X and Gen Y. The world is changing. More and more companies offer flexibilities like working remotely or on flexible schedules. I fully expect that I will not be retiring like my parents' generation was able to. When I say this to anyone significantly older than me, I get a lecture.
Funny, I guess I'm a saver but I think buying new furniture is stupid. We've always contributed 15% to retirement and have a very healthy 6 figure income but we just replaced our bedroom garage sale and parents' hand me downs last year. We're 37 and we replaced them with estate sale furniture.
But I got a very expensive piece of jewelry for our anniversary so it's just about priorities and what you care about. Unless its antique or something very high quality you'll keep forever I think spending money on furniture is kind of dumb.
Get out of the dichotomous thinking spiral and you'll be a lot happier. Life has a lot more grey to it than those who think in black and white (savers vs spenders) might want to to admit. You could ponder a ratio of saving-to-spending that would help you feel more comfortable with your choices: Live some, save some. Life is also dynamic so you always have to be prepared to reconsider and not get hung up on it if it changes. We just sold company stocks and we also had to make a decision as to what to do with the resulting $16k. I let my husband reinvest a couple thousand as a "hobby" into whatever stocks he wanted. I put probably $3k into our travel account that we'll likely use in December, I put $3k into our checking account that will just be absorbed by everyday things and the rest went into long-term savings (mutual funds, 529's). Percentage wise, 12.5% went directly to my husband to "play" with (ultimately he's the one who's earning it all anyway), 18% went to everyday life, 18% went to travel and 50% went to long-term savings. We are anticipating a yearly bonus and I've already decided that I will put 10% into long-term savings, 10% into travel funds and 80% into a specific savings account (or some sort of short-term investment) that will be used to buy (in cash) an electric car in 2-3 years. I try to be very faithful to a specific savings ratio for money coming from my husband's paycheck but with things like stocks, inheritance and bonuses, I take the liberty to consider just exactly how it ought to be used and it's never the same.
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I am in my 30s as well and I don't understand why Baby Boomers can't get that retirement will be different for Gen X and Gen Y. The world is changing. More and more companies offer flexibilities like working remotely or on flexible schedules. I fully expect that I will not be retiring like my parents' generation was able to. When I say this to anyone significantly older than me, I get a lecture.
Most older people get tired quickly of the "Woe is me" attitudes that we are constantly hearing.
Most older people get tired quickly of the "Woe is me" attitudes that we are constantly hearing.
Aw gee, Grampa...so sorry the young whippersnappers in their 30s have different opinions than you. Its odd to me how so many people need others to constantly validate their life choices. Enjoy your retirement-- I guarantee you will be the last generation to get it.
Funny, I guess I'm a saver but I think buying new furniture is stupid. We've always contributed 15% to retirement and have a very healthy 6 figure income but we just replaced our bedroom garage sale and parents' hand me downs last year. We're 37 and we replaced them with estate sale furniture.
But I got a very expensive piece of jewelry for our anniversary so it's just about priorities and what you care about. Unless its antique or something very high quality you'll keep forever I think spending money on furniture is kind of dumb.
Why are people seeming to take offense at the OP's offhand mention of buying furniture? That's not what I read in this thread...
.........1. Do Savers ever get to the day when they feel like its okay to spend their money? ...............
No. They don't. My mother in law never spent her money - ever - and died with $100,000 in the bank in spite of the fact that she was single almost all her life, raised 3 kids and never made more than 10$ an hour. In fact, people who know will tell you that savers often become poorer (in their mind) as they grow older.
Investors! Ah, now there's a group you didn't name. Investors become wealthier over time, and many of them spend their lifetimes studying the ways of money and enjoying their work and the fruits of their investments. Read, "The Richest Man in Babylon"
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Originally Posted by confusedasusual
Do Spenders actually understand or care about how much things cost? Credit card debt seems not to phase this group, nor does buying a 60k car on an income of 50k.
No. My daughter is one. Last month she did well, so they bought a camper. Payments. The month before things were not going well so they had a yard sale to pay bills. She has not a brain in her head. She is a mortgage broker, and signed herself up for an interest only loan. Their house is too big, they are buried in debt and every time they make a dollar they spend 2.
Reading between the lines: Sounds to me like you have it about right. Rent if you like or buy if you prefer; it doesn't really make much difference, sometimes. But I will say this: If you buy, buy small. Those big houses will eat you alive.
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