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Old 12-27-2014, 11:53 PM
 
Location: DFW
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Picture 2 imperfect individuals.

The first one has no friends and has no desires to make any but has big dreams and tries very hard to accomplish them with as little help as possible.

The second one has lots of friends but has no goals or dreams in life to look forward to.

If you are destined to be one of the two but can pick to be one of the two, which would you choose?
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Old 12-28-2014, 02:14 AM
 
402 posts, read 291,063 times
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Default Hard Decision

I lean towards number 1. However, I love hanging out with my close friends. I'll go with #1.
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Old 12-28-2014, 03:03 AM
 
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It's automatically #1. Everyone needs a vision or dream for their lives no matter big or small.
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Old 12-28-2014, 06:30 AM
 
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There is a saying that lots of friends means no friends.

Plus leaning on yourself is being a much better friend to any friends.
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Old 12-28-2014, 08:30 AM
 
Location: Victoria TX
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Friends are not assets or resources to be exploited. The value of your friends is only as good as your value as a friend to them. Being a friend has a cost, and you need to be willing to expend it.

As for goals, your goal should be to reach the end of your life with no regrets that there were things left undone. Friends can often be impediments to your goals, especially if you can be influenced by peer pressure.
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Old 12-28-2014, 08:02 PM
 
Location: Northeastern US
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The second person with lots of friends evidently has the goal to enjoy, and possibly to acquire, friends. Everyone who remains alive has a goal of some kind, however (ir)rational it may be.

The first person is going to be content if they're not very social / extroverted, and that is fine. Friendlessness is only a problem if you are lonely ... always keeping in mind that there's nothing quite like the loneliness in a bad relationship ;-)
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Old 12-29-2014, 10:40 AM
 
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For me 2, is much more preferable. Striving for goals is primarily a Western attitude I'm highly disdainful of. I prefer living in the present as much as possible. It seems to me goals are symptom of the type of perpetual desire and dissatisfaction so endemic to US society; if one is always striving for something (goals), one is never satisfied.

I prefer to just take life as it comes. That isn't to say I'm reckless or myopic (I do have IRAs); I just don't want constantly.
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Old 12-30-2014, 02:51 PM
 
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Define friend. True friend is as rare as good mate to live with. (wife, or significant other).
Most simply have a bunch of acquaintances, with large percentage of them collected based on personal benefit they can provide.
But a true friend is a rare jewel.
To answer your Q tough, OP, I'd rather have a goal and action, than mindless entertainment and senses satisfaction.
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Old 12-31-2014, 12:55 AM
 
Location: Earth
4,549 posts, read 3,501,073 times
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Well, there's pros and cons to both. Currently, I am the 1st, a bit. I have plans and goals, but no friends. Least with this, you can be confident in your accomplishments, and you worked hard and didn't just take up space as a lump.

Though it gets lonely with no friends, or lovers.

The latter has it's perks. You have companionship, someone to talk to, people to be there for you. But with no goals or dreams.....well. How well can you live, and how much can you accomplish, unless you live sponging off of friends or relatives. I mean, with no goals or ambitions, chances are, only the bare minimum will be done, and thus probably not too grand a job or money made.
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Old 01-01-2015, 03:37 AM
 
632 posts, read 628,843 times
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A man once told me, have no expectations in life, of yourself or others. Than you will never be disappointed in life. He pointed out you could be pleasantly surprised in the end.
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