Obama Jokes

[wrench409]

In a bold move today, President Obama has made an effort to wean himself off the teleprompter. After calling a news conference inviting the media, he issued an extensive in depth statement LIVE while NOT using the controversial device, saying "I realize it's uh, been an issue, uh for a lot of uh, people".

Since every room in the residence has a teleprompter, the safety issue has been a concern for all. The main problem, cords, power supplies, tipping over at the most inopportune times and throwing off serious statements the country must hear. The kids are nervous having them in the toilet and shower areas. Hallways and closets are cluttered with them as well. And in private he has admitted it's a real pain to read a book at times, having to get up, walk over to the teleprompter, flip the page and reposition it correctly on the machine, then go back, sit down and continue. 'Sometimes, I put the book in upside down, negating my efforts and I have to start again. And Michelle has simply said 'No' to the putting up three or four in the new garden'.

In his next Stimulus plan, he has proposed $434 billion in spending to reduce the size and scope of the devices. 'This will create thousands of jobs for people in our country. The technology is exciting, economically friendly, and frankly the seriousness of the crisis in this country regarding teleprompters must be addressed now. The issue is not having something to read from the teleprompter, there are plenty of people who type what I supposed to day. We have no time to wait. If we are to continue as a driving force in the world (of teleprompter reading), we must act boldly, swiftly and only with the complete efforts of every American will we get this job done.' he said reading from the new device he models below:

Moderator cut: Copyrighted photos are NOT allowed

[Teak]

Under this Obama presidency the IRS is more diligent about detecting red flags, like leftover money in your bank account after you pay your taxes.