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Before my step-dad married my mum he had to make a few adjustments:
No facial hair
No smoking cigars No guns
...The way things turned out, it was a good thing for the family's well-being that he didn't have a gun (or does he?, I dunno, I did see an NRA magazine in his suitcase not long before I left) in the house, since he can be a violent and deranged man whenever he is drunk
Now, I work the night shift, and recently there has been a string of robberies around the neighborhoods I live in. While my own neighborhood is in a safe area, I commute through these neighborhoods by bike (not enough money for a car, ever since cash for clunkers). I've been considering getting a weapon (and my state only allows conceal carry)
Are women like my mum an anomaly, or should I keep quiet on this issue so as not to limit my dating options?
My first response is no. But then thinking about it. If my husband carried a gun, I'd make an exception for him.
This^
Quote:
Originally Posted by brocco
by itself it isnt an issue...certainly not a dealbreaker for a man i was otherwise into.
also This^
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheHurricaneKid
I don't do cigars, I was just using it to make a point that women have certain deal breakers, and I was wondering if a firearm is one of them
Not a dealbreaker for me-just not an incentive, either.
Quote:
Originally Posted by acaligirl
There is no blanket answer to your question that is going to point you to either carrying or not. Each person you date will have a different opinion about guns.
That^
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77
I won't date a gun fanatic. If he has them for hunting, police officer, or in the service it makes sense.
But if has 300 of them, I ask why?
and That^
I'm generally weapon-averse,
the more easy to discharge/use & the more lethal, the more it intimidates & unnerves me.
On the other hand, I don't spend much time thinking about the subject,
plus it's hard to predict how I'd feel until I meet someone in particular with whom the issue arises...
It may depend on how "mentally together"-or a "loose cannon" (pun intended)-the guy seems, in my estimation.
Don't get me wrong. I am not out to take away a legally obtained firearm. I just don't want to be around civilians who may or may not have had the proper training, may or may not know what they are doing, and may or may not behave the way someone who has been trained and does know what he is doing would, should they ever feel compelled to use it.
This...I am overall weapon-averse, myself, and the only reason I am cool with it is because I know my BF has been extensively trained in marksmanship as a member of the armed forces. He's not the average yokel with a gun, playing cowboy on the weekends, and it's not fun and games to him, it was a tool with which to arm himself when he was serving in Iraq.
If he waited that long to tell me, I'd dump him. I feel that's the kind of thing to disclose to people early on.
I agree with that, absolutely. It should be disclosed early. My BF let me know in our early phone conversations, before we even met, that he collected guns, and carried. No one should keep something like that from a potential partner.
But his father has a gun and is a completely different and a much better man, in fact, he is the same man that my step-father was the first two years of their marriage. I suspect that he turned out to be a worse person because he couldn't be himself and let alcohol get the best of him.
I love it when people use the "I know someone who was robbed" excuse. What exactly do you think a gun would do for them in that situation? "Excuse me, Mr Robber? Can you give me a moment to whip out my pistol so we'll be equally matched?" Give me a break.
I've always felt that if I had to hide something from a girl, she is not for me. I find the topic a bit humerous and I'll explain why. I grew up around guns, we were taught how to use them. My mother has carried a pistol on her since the day I was born and still does to this day. Seeing how woman are often the targets of physically stronger predators, I think it's awesome that I'm meeting more and more woman who carry firearms. I do not have a CHL (concealed handgun license), but have dated a couple of girls that did.
My advice, I wouldn't go out of the way to bring it up on the first date, but I wouldn't go out of the way to hide it.
If your beau is a cop or a drug dealer then I would have to say that any man who carries a gun out of some civil liberties issue and the fact that he can, has some issues. Most likely these issues stem from a stupid desire to be more man than man. You should convince him to exert his manliness in healthier ways.
I am not saying this as an anti-gun nut. I own a gun and have shot several guns but I would not walk around with it like I am Dirty Harry.
Sorry if I missed an important point. I didn't read all the posts.
I love it when people use the "I know someone who was robbed" excuse. What exactly do you think a gun would do for them in that situation? "Excuse me, Mr Robber? Can you give me a moment to whip out my pistol so we'll be equally matched?" Give me a break.
Exactly. And for every story of someone using their firearm to successfully fend off a bad guy there are literally hundreds of stories of that gun killing being used (either accidentally or intentionally) to kill its owner or a member of the owner's family. Of course, everyone thinks that only happens to other people and could never happen to them because they're safer than everyone else, but the numbers just don't back that up. Unless you live in a war zone of some kind, you are exponentially more likely to be killed by yourself or a loved one than you are by an intruder.
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Really an anomaly? Your mom had common sense!
