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I think it's pushback - not that gays or other minorities are necessarily proud of something they have no control over but that they're letting everyone else know they're not going to be treated as 2md class citizens because of it.
But gays are not the same as a race. Gays are different because of who they sleep with or attracted to.
Let me start this by saying that I have absolutely no problem with what someone else's sexual preference is as long as they respect mine.
Now can someone explain to me exactly what gay pride is? It's my understanding that being gay isn't a choice but instead something that you just are. So how can you be proud of something that you had no control over? Being gay isn't an achievement or something you worked hard for. I'm hetero. It's not something that I'm proud or ashamed of. It's just something that is. Now you can embrace being gay, but proud? Proud about what?
I think there are different versions of pride, or at least different reasons to have it. Not all of these reasons are at the person's control. What's more, some forms of pride are politically incorrect and have double standards. I think that's where it gets kind of dicey and maybe just a little bit odd. A straight person cannot say he or she is proud of being straight without violating political correctness. The same is true with a white person being proud of being white.
Gay people have been shamed, beaten, killed and everything else for who they are..."gay pride" simply means not wanting to be shamed into silence or hiding their true identities.
People are and have been shamed, beaten, killed and everything else for many reasons and those things have happened to other groups of people far more than have ever happened to gay people. There is no comparison for the things that have happened to people without regard to their sexual being to what has happened to gays, on the scale gays are nearly zero when considering their hardships.
Anyone who has ever watched a gay pride parade quickly realizes that it has almost nothing to do with being gay and almost everything to do with sex.
Shame is something one accepts, no one can put it onto another. Accepting the value of others is what causes shame. If you accept what you are as a human being, no other can shame you. It is only when you subject yourself to thinking their value of you matters that you experience shame.
Saying you have gay pride doesn't mean a thing, you are what you are and nothing can change that. If you accept shame or acknowledge it then you aren't true to yourself.
Just read the posts that start with "young professional gay..." or similar content. The more a person treats or thinks of themselves as different the more others will accept that and follow suit.
Live as a human being and achieve and let those achievements speak for you, they will unless you make what you think you are more important. Achieve and be proud of that, not something you say you were born to be. If you want to be proud, be proud you are a human being and not some sub group. All humans are the same species.
It's basically the equivalent of saying that you're not ashamed of who you are and you don't hate or judge yourself for who you are the way that others might hate or judge you. It's similar to ethnic pride, but not as similar to regional pride. Regional pride is more about having a love for the place that you live/come from (see; proud to be an American). It's a poor word choice in all of those cases, but it gets the point across.
I am shocked that OP doesn't really get it and suspect instead that he/she is yet another internet provocateur, aka T-R-O-L-L. But, yes, you've expressed it exactly.
Gay people have been shamed, beaten, killed and everything else for who they are..."gay pride" simply means not wanting to be shamed into silence or hiding their true identities.
This, more or less.
I think you also all need to study up on the history of gay pride, and why the parades were started in the first place. They were basically a reaction to the Stonewall riots of 1969, when the gay community was forced to fight against intolerance. Following that incident (among others), they decided to gather annually to celebrate who they are - while essentially giving the middle finger to bigots, repressive laws, etc. Then came the 1980s with the AIDS epidemic, when these parades shifted from celebration to unity, remembrance, and education. Finally you come to present day, where it's more a combination of celebrating and fighting for (marriage) equality. Now do you understand what gay pride really means?
But gays are not the same as a race. Gays are different because of who they sleep with or attracted to.
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Originally Posted by Sprite97
A race is different than being gay. Gay is a sexual orientation or preference.
So what? Two groups don't have to be the SAME to be equally "allowed" to their pride... being Jewish isn't the same as being black, but is there something weird about my pride in being Jewish? If you want to show pride in who you are, by all means do it! But why rain on some other group's parade (literally), just because you don't care to celebrate yourself? I also hate when people play the old "this group had it worse/better," because again, that shouldn't negate the struggles or rights of anyone else.
People are and have been shamed, beaten, killed and everything else for many reasons and those things have happened to other groups of people far more than have ever happened to gay people. There is no comparison for the things that have happened to people without regard to their sexual being to what has happened to gays, on the scale gays are nearly zero when considering their hardships.
As I just said above, who's had it better or worse is irrelevant... that still doesn't negate their rights to be heard, and/or to celebrate without the constant scrutiny. We get these types of questions all the time on C-D, usually during Gay Pride month and Black Pride month, but nobody questions why we celebrate St. Patrick's Day? Or why Irish people get tattoos of the Irish flag etc? I could argue the Irish had it easy compared to many, so why do they feel the need to show pride? Because they want to, and that is all the explanation I personally require.
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Anyone who has ever watched a gay pride parade quickly realizes that it has almost nothing to do with being gay and almost everything to do with sex.
I have attended many (have you?), and do not realize that as of yet. Sure, there are some sexually-themed booths and so forth, but that isn't the FOCUS of these celebrations... at least not the ones I've attended in SF, where the focus is more on community & social awareness.
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Saying you have gay pride doesn't mean a thing, you are what you are and nothing can change that. If you accept shame or acknowledge it then you aren't true to yourself.
Just read the posts that start with "young professional gay..." or similar content. The more a person treats or thinks of themselves as different the more others will accept that and follow suit.
Live as a human being and achieve and let those achievements speak for you, they will unless you make what you think you are more important. Achieve and be proud of that, not something you say you were born to be. If you want to be proud, be proud you are a human being and not some sub group. All humans are the same species.
Everyone has their own sense of being, and you have no right to dictate how others should self-identify. Why does this even bother you? Not all gay people are like that, but if they do identify strongly with their "gay side," I don't see how that should matter to anyone else.
Besides, you really don't understand what it's like for them, and why this means more than you feel it should. If you had been taunted, shamed, harassed, disowned, etc, for something you could not change, you too would feel the need to stand up proudly. I know this from experience as a Jewish woman, because whenever someone attacks my/our Jewish identity, it only makes me want to flaunt it LOUDER! Maybe that's just the redhead in me, though.
I prefer the word embracing, because I feel that pride is more something you've done that you can be, well, proud of...but I don't have a problem with the word. I recently came out as lesbian after years of trying to suppress and hide it, and I'm learning to embrace it. Feels good, I don't feel trapped, empty, depressed, and afraid of myself anymore. I can go out, find someone, and be happy. I feel more free.
But because gay rights is still an issue, and gay people still have to deal with bullies (especially in high school) and being discriminated against for what they were born with and who they love...having a community that will accept you, help you, love you for who you are...it's a nice thing to have.
Though some people do make it their only identity and never shut up about it, which can get annoying. I know someone like this, and they insert being gay into anything they say. We know you're gay, so am I, good for you, now can you please talk about something else? Haha. I know most aren't like this though. It's just a few people I know...
I don't make it my identity, and I don't talk about it unless the conversation or topic is brought up...or if a guy won't take no for an answer when hitting on me. Sometimes, even telling him I'm gay doesn't work....bleh. I mean it is a part of who I am...but I feel there are more things about me that are more important.
I wish it wasn't such a big deal. It really shouldn't be. Maybe someday...
Last edited by Harmonica_Blues; 02-14-2014 at 10:41 PM..
I think it's pushback - not that gays or other minorities are necessarily proud of something they have no control over but that they're letting everyone else know they're not going to be treated as 2md class citizens because of it.
EXACTLY. Well put.
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