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People are looking for reasons to get offended and show outrage.
Also reasons to criticize people that believe in god.
Understand this as far as the subject matter of the op. It's not outrage or even being offended....more like just annoying.
It's not important enough for outrage
It's because wishful thinking is simply a lazy thing for people to claim they have done without taking action to actually help others. You mentioned the wildfires, that's a good example. Wishful thinking won't do anything, but encouraging people to help those by donating money to help them does. This is why people are upset when others say things like "I will pray for you". That's just wishful thinking. If you really care, you would encourage others where to donate money for the cause, because leading them to pray does nothing. If someone is sick, we don't want you to pray for them, we want you to take action and get them the best medical help possible, offering to take them to the doctor. Just saying you will pray is lazy and that's what makes people upset.
That's a lot of it. If someone says thoughts and prayers but also donates/helps with a lot of causes that's cool with me.
However it's still a difficult phrase to hear for this reason
Quote:
Originally Posted by katzpaw
Mainly it's the hypocrisy of saying "Thank God", "God heard your prayers", or "God spared you" while "he" wreaks havoc and death on those around you.
If it's someone I admire I do understand their heart is in the right place but it's aggravating to get that response when you have seen enough evidence that if this God figure exists they don't care about you. If it works for you fine..maybe you've been blessed even but you can't assume everyone else has the same experience.
If it's a situation that you can't do anything about I'd much rather hear/see that the person has actually been there and understands..something along those lines. You can't put out a blanket statement like that. There should be specifics that can be tailored to the person.
It's especially important because some of us are realistic pessimists. You can put out all the prayers you want but it won't change a thing. The positivity has to be meaningful. I have a lot of backgrounds in my phone library filled with quotes so it's not as simple as just being bitter. One example is "I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together" I do often question "everything happens for a reason" myself so when I tell myself that I end up still looking for a reason and go insane when I can't find it but it does make a lot of sense. Though my favorite (which I surprisingly don't have on my phone yet) I have heard on tv shows/movies I watch all the time "life isn't about the destination it's about the journey"
Quote:
Originally Posted by mikeyyc
I was, but hey, it's a free-for all discussion. I think it all boils down to sincerity. If someone genuinely cares, it doesn't matter what they say, it's always appreciated. When someone is saying something (anything) just so that they can be seen to be "doing something" it always rings hollow. Lately that something has been hopes and prayers.
This too. I still have that part of me that goes "ugh" but if it's someone I admire I appreciate it a lot more. I actually do that with other people too. If I don't care to know how someone's doing I don't ask "how are you". Thoughts and prayers can be the new how are you at times. They don't really care they just pretend to.
Well the fact is anyone telling me what God thinks or how God works is a liar or delusional. Case in point, saying "God has a plan for us all" or "it was Gods will" in the aftermath of a disaster. They dont know that at all except having been spoon fed the nonsense from the bible (AKA "the word of God". Which of course is the word of man. God can create the universe but not printing presses)
So in summary people react angrily because in the face of tragedy theists come around peddling what amounts to complete bull. Its not helpful its insulting.
Freedom of religion means you can practice yours as well as we should not be subjected to it.
I am an agnostic anti theist by the way. When asked what my faith is I say "I am a man of science. In science faith is a vice. In religion it is a requirement."
Scientists particularly astro physicists are heros of sorts to me. I don't see why science and religion have to clash so much. It is only when people take a religion and twist it for personal gain (which science can be also) is when things go wrong. I don't judge you for being a non believer, not my place to and I wouldn't reject your friendship just because. You want to ask me about my faith I'll reply but I'm not the kind that pushes it in your face and just saying "I pray for you" is not pushing religion it is a personal way of saying "I feel ya".
"Gods will" some may believe that literally, to me Gods will means there is a rhyme and reason to the universe even if I don't understand exactly why, that's called faith. Even the greatest scientists have been wrong at times, there is plenty that they just don't know. Who's to say? I can tell you that I pray and have experienced a positive result from it, I can't prove it to you , you have to take my word in faith, but since I tell you it changed me how can you deny it because you can't prove it didn't change me.
Now for saying "best wishes" as a response which also could be a lazy response as some have claimed, that response doesn't cultivate such harsh responses compared to "my prayers are with you" which can only mean some have a chip on their shoulder against those who believe in prayer, not against those who may give a "lazy" response.
Now for saying "best wishes" as a response which also could be a lazy response as some have claimed, that response doesn't cultivate such harsh responses compared to "my prayers are with you" which can only mean some have a chip on their shoulder against those who believe in prayer, not against those who may give a "lazy" response.
"Best wishes" is literally a rote sign-off like "sincerely." It's about as deep as calling someone "Dear So-and-so" in the greeting - could be anyone from your beloved mother to an IRS agent for how much emotional meaning the phrase now carries. Is that the depth you, as a person of faith, want ascribed to prayers? That it's just a phrase you mouth or write because it's the pro forma, fill-in-the-blank response?
That's a lot of it. If someone says thoughts and prayers but also donates/helps with a lot of causes that's cool with me.
However it's still a difficult phrase to hear for this reason
If it's someone I admire I do understand their heart is in the right place but it's aggravating to get that response when you have seen enough evidence that if this God figure exists they don't care about you. If it works for you fine..maybe you've been blessed even but you can't assume everyone else has the same experience.
If it's a situation that you can't do anything about I'd much rather hear/see that the person has actually been there and understands..something along those lines. You can't put out a blanket statement like that. There should be specifics that can be tailored to the person.
There are so many things I'd like to post but I'll just say this is one of the saddest things I've read on c-d.
It's often people who have gone through hell that have the strongest faith. Historically, the two groups that have had some of the worst experiences in life - Jews and blacks - have had unwavering faith.
I'm genuinely sorry you feel the way you do, Nickchick. Not about believing in God, but the rest of it.
I don't even know what to say beyond that. I hope things get better for you.
I have noticed more and more on news sites that allow comments to articles, anytime someone offers prayers to something bad happening , like right now the California fires there are a certain amount of commenters who get hostile and call the other commenter foolish and and say *********your prayers and your fake "sky god" and on and on.
So what's up with that hostility? Someone in good heart just wants to offer prayer on behalf that things get better and they get pounded in hostility for it?
If you don't believe fine, but is there a need to get in someone's "face" and tell them how they are stupid and so on? Seems like those that do so have a chip on their shoulder.
The “thoughts and prayers” phrase has been so over used by some really insincere people that it has become insulting.
I have noticed more and more on news sites that allow comments to articles, anytime someone offers prayers to something bad happening , like right now the California fires there are a certain amount of commenters who get hostile and call the other commenter foolish and and say *********your prayers and your fake "sky god" and on and on.
So what's up with that hostility? Someone in good heart just wants to offer prayer on behalf that things get better and they get pounded in hostility for it?
If you don't believe fine, but is there a need to get in someone's "face" and tell them how they are stupid and so on? Seems like those that do so have a chip on their shoulder.
This stems from all the gun violence in schools, work places, churches, theaters and wherever else. Many are demanding gun control which Republicans turn a blind eye to. Republicans don't even care about these 3 D guns being homemade. What are prayers going to do. No one wants prayers, they want action. And this is where the hostility comes from. No one has a chip on their shoulder though.
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