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When writing news articles (I am not a writer) I know it is important to capture a reader. However, it struck a chord in me this morning when I saw: "Autopsies scheduled for 7 slain at Ga. mobile home".
I read the article out of interest that 7 people at one home had been murdered. In the body, I found this nugget.
"Investigators were talking to neighbors about whether they saw or heard anything unusual at the dingy mobile home shaded by large, moss-draped oaks with an old boat in the front yard. "
I don't find that appropriate. These people just lost their lives and the reporter felt the need to comment on the "dingy" mobile home and the old boat in the front yard. Does this lessen these peoples worth? Should I have stopped reading because these people didn't matter, or was the description designed to keep me reading because there is probably something "trashy" afoot. Is that why the article title had Mobile Home in it in the first place?
I really want some insight from people who write for a living. Is there a statistic showing that people want to hear more about murders in mobile homes?
BTW - I own two homes and not one is a mobile home, so I am not taking offense at stereotypes etc.
In police investigations it can be very helpful to be as descriptive as possible. You never know when someone was randomly in a neighborhood (plumber, electrician, home health aid, etc.) and their memory will be jogged by that type of description--and it turns out that they do remember seeing a car, a person, or hearing something that could be helpful to the police.
I certainly would recall the "dingy mobile home shaded by large, moss-draped oaks with an old boat in the front yard" long before I'd recall a random mobile home--especially if it was in an area where it was surrounded by 20 other random mobile homes.
I go past a few dozen mobile homes every day on my way to work and back, and couldn't begin to describe a single one, except for the really old one under the large oak trees with hanging Spanish moss, a boarded up window, and two rusted out cars in the yard. I have no idea who lives there, or if it's even occupied. But if it were simply described as "the mobile home at 1224 XXXX Road," I'd have no clue of where they were talking about (it's a 10 mile long rural road), even if I were perhaps the person who did see something where the description would jog my memory.
Since this topic really isn't about writing, but about how people's perceptions may be shaped by something they read, I'm moving it to a different forum.
Location: Jonquil City (aka Smyrna) Georgia- by Atlanta
16,259 posts, read 24,752,651 times
Reputation: 3587
Mobile homes and ghettos are both places where lots of bad things tend to happen. The news media tends to focus more on the ghettos because they tend to be inside big cities where the media is mostly located.
That is not to say that everybody in a mobile home is a bad person, a drunk or a meth head but I have rarely seen a trailer park that did not look like a total dump with trash all over the place and dogs running loose. And the ones that are nice are either "over 50" parks or ones where people actually own the lots the mobile home sits on.
'Mobile home' or 'trailer park' are code words for white trash. Plain and simple.
Unlike KevK, I have seen trailer parks that are well kept up however they do house more unsavory types merely because of how cheap they are. Like cheap houses/apartments in the worst parts of a city. Many times all a local paper has to do is write the address of a murder and that would be enough for everyone to 'know' that it was done in an area with a lot of gang activity (and in my neck of the woods that would be black and/or latino areas of town).
The author seemed artistically moved by the fact that this particular mobile home park was the setting. Much of the article is about the history of the park's land.
Either moved or the article is color while waiting for further police reports.
Just like the story a while back on here, The woman was driving a mini-van. What does driving a mini-van have any thing to do speeding? Nothing. It was invoked to plant a picture of an innocent mother stopped for no reason. as they say, "words have meaning".
Just like the story a while back on here, The woman was driving a mini-van. What does driving a mini-van have any thing to do speeding? Nothing. It was invoked to plant a picture of an innocent mother stopped for no reason. as they say, "words have meaning".
The author seemed artistically moved by the fact that this particular mobile home park was the setting. Much of the article is about the history of the park's land.
Either moved or the article is color while waiting for further police reports.
Thank you for the insight, you sound like a writer or someone that may know the trade.
I don't find it appropriate either. They do not need to be further descriptive in this situation as you can bet it is more than evident that this particular home is where this incident happened.
It doesn't matter whether one lives in a Mobile Home, Modular Home, RV, apartment or a mcmansion it doesn't make them any more or less, they are simply human beings.
This was just as pathetic as Charlie Gibson and someone from the boston globe (editor maybe?) chatting last night when Kennedy's casket was being removed from the Hearse at Arlington, they were discussing what would be done with the Kennedy home and turning it into a National Park. That is so very distasteful to say it as nice as I can. My point, they were booting the Widow out of the home and building a park. Tacky...
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