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Lets see...
"What shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul"
"It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven"
"Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of Go"
"You have heard that it was said, 'an eye for an eye', and a tooth for a tooth.' But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if someone wants to sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you"
"Then the Pharisees went out and laid plans to trap him in his words. They sent their disciples to him along with the Herodians. "Teacher," they said, "we know you are a man of integrity and that you teach the way of God in accordance with the truth. You aren't swayed by men, because you pay no attention to who they are. Tell us then, what is your opinion? Is it right to pay taxes to Caesar or not?"
And the republicans would say No. Definitely not anything that contemporary republicanism represents.
Clearly not. Jesus would be a Hippie, and Hippies support The Green Party. Jesus would have voted for Cynthia McKinney in 2008.
The real question is, would Jesus be a Christian? If so, which sect would he choose? Lutheran? Protestant? Irish Catholic? Roman Catholic? Evangelical? Southern Baptist? Eastern Orthodox? Mormon? The list goes on and on...
Jesus would be THE most flaming liberal hippie you ever did see. Wandering around barefoot, asking people for food, consorting with what the public had decided were rif-raff and criminals, sleeping in caves or outside or inside or...anywhere he could, and saying you should give all your belongings away to the collective poor, Jesus would be the absolute epitome of "liberal," and all the conservatives on CD would be screaming that he was a lazy-*ss punk who felt like spouting his mouth off and getting free wine instead of working.
When he knocked at your door and asked if he could sleep in your barn for a few days while he and his friends preached, you'd call him a g*d d*mned loser, slam the door in his face and scream out your window that you hoped he'd freeze to death overnight for being such a lazy punk. You'd tell him if he cut his hair and got a job, then maybe you'd let him in. If he could pay the full price for a room, of course.
If one of your ridiculous lib friends, who did in fact just happen to work for a living despite your precious fantasies (a lot of that going around, it seems!) said, "Come on, man. He's a good person. I've heard him talk. He and his friends will freeze out there, or robbers will come and kill them," you'd say, "Good! Hope they get his friends too. That'll be 13 fewer problems for this town to worry about."
You'd call the police to get him off your street if he tried to preach there. You'd smile as he was thrown into jail and you'd say he's the reason society was for crap.
And you all know it. You would condemn a "Jesus" today up one end and down the other, hope to see him fail and then laugh as loudly as you could if he were ever suffering because you'd decided in advance it was his own fault for not leading a mainstream life. You'd be the ones crucifying him. And that's the truth.
All of the conservatives that once lived on earth are going to be rather surprised upon their deaths indeed to hear St. Peter say, "Sorry...not you," all the while ushering the libs, who gave a shoot about people, I don't know, eating and having doctors and all that, getting into heaven. See ya there, MassVt! You bring the Coors, I'll bring the Village Voice!
All of the conservatives that once lived on earth are going to be rather surprised upon their deaths indeed to hear St. Peter say, "Sorry...not you," all the while ushering the libs, who gave a shoot about people, I don't know, eating and having doctors and all that, getting into heaven. See ya there, MassVt! You bring the Coors, I'll bring the Village Voice!
And speaking about supporting good causes, are you in for a one-way deportation ticket to Costa Rica for Rush? I'm ready, willing and able
If Jesus were to come along today into todays America- he would be labeled a homeless, crazy nut, who would be ignored by all that passed him by on the street,they wouldn't even give him a second look as they passed him on their way to work- I see so many homeless 'preachers' on the streets of Chicago as it is, who's to say one of them couldn't be the next Jesus- he would probably end up getting thrown in jail- he could perform miracles and no one would believe they were real-'Ah its all a fake'---todays cynicism rampant in all of us would make his task far more difficult than it was in the bible-I doubt he would want to associate with any of the political parties in the U.S.- probably start his own-if he did get any followers they would be labeled a cult and probably be slaughtered ala Waco-
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